Ramblings on a wall: Cashing in my reality check

3rd blog entry of 2010 and its already 17 June 2010!

2010-06-17T17:03:00.002+08:00

Half the year has gone by, and I've not blogged anything since 1 March! Guess I'm really into the facebook notes thingy, so don't really blog anymore. Anyway just a quick summary of what happened in the past few weeks..

Met Boon, Ian and Yuhong for lunch some time in May. They came down to raffles place just to have a meal with me, was pretty touched by that gesture of friendship.

Got to MAMBO quite often! i think i've gone mambo about more than 10 times already this year! getting more fun cos made more friends who like mambo, like Elaine, Yuen Yen (michelle's friend), Audrey, Rallen, etc. shall not mention the other more annoying pple though! haha..

Went to Australia for 11 days, Gold coast and Melbourne (which included mornington peninsula!), check out the note on fb for more details on it!

Alicia and Ziqian got married, Yvonne Yap and her husband (can't remember his name), Cuixia and Sujin are pregnant, Eunice and Yongji got married and moved to Abu Dabi, and so many other things.

Oh yes, more recently, Joan and her family moved to Kovan.

In a nutshell thats what happened from March till now. Got to rush to do work now.

2nd post of 2010!

2010-03-01T17:36:00.003+08:00

Can't believe I only posted once the whole of 2010 and its already 1 March 2010 today!

I guess I don't really have much stuff to post here, now that I've got an iphone and can update everything on facebook! i haven't gotten a twitter yet cos i think its really stupid, and nobody will bother to follow me anyway cos i'm not some superstar or super important person! haha.. i don't really like to announce what i'm doing or thinking to the whole world anyway. =p

Anyway just had a nice relaxing weekend and wanna thank God for it. Though I actually missed service cos I was unable to wake up in time to go expo. =P

Had tea with Audrey and her friend Ding Li at 313, then went HMV to browse songs until Elaine, Val, Xiangling and Momo joined me for dinner at Marche at 313 at about 6.30 pm. Had a great time catching up with them all, knowing whats happening in their lives and all the ex-CL zone members! Then Val left after dinner and the 4 of us when shopping till around 10 pm, then Xiangling and Momo needed to go home, so I went to play pool and just hang out and chit chat with Elaine..

She appears to have a some bitterness towards some pple in her life.. Not a good sign, cos bitterness will always end up hurting the person in some way. I know she still believes in God, I know she believes the Word and wants to come back, but there's so many things hindering her. Perhaps thats why I have such compassion for her, cos I feel that she deserves more than this. And needless to say, she's also an October baby! 20 October is her birthday! Yishan is 13 October if i remember correctly.. I really do have good friends who are born in the same month as me! Hahaha...

And on Sunday, hung out with my primary school friends at 313 again! Hahaha.. i suppose its my fault for recommending the place to them. It was great catching up with Kelly, Lishan, Yingyan, Shujun, Jacob, etc.. but honestly i was only really interested in hanging out with Kelly and Lishan, cos I was always close to them. The rest not really, maybe except for Liangfeng cos he was my agent for awhile. Haha.. Shujun is really pretty and I wonder why is she single. Maybe cos guys generally afraid to go for career minded girls? Hahaha.. but its amazing how after so long, Kelly and I can really click, think of the same lame jokes, and we got tons of stories to exchange! Felt like old times again, minus the fact that we're now all grown up. Yvonne's getting married in May, thats the latest news..

At the end of the day, I just hung out with Joan. It seems we have some difficulty seeing eye to eye on a lot of things now that we're on the way to get married.. And i don't like this feeling. I hope, I pray that we're able to work things out, and our love for each other won't grow weary with the disagreements..

First entry of 2010!

2010-01-06T10:26:00.002+08:00

Seems that I've not updated my blog for quite some time! Just thought of dropping a few thoughts here, and a quick prayer to begin the new year!

God I'm in such a pile of work I don't know where to start, I don't feel like doing anything, and I'm feeling sleepy as side effects from the pills! What a bad way to begin 2010.. sighz.

I didn't go service on Sunday cos I was so sleepy n tired after going cycling on sat night with Joan, then had supper at Carls junior at east coast. i don't think we got home too late, cos after supper i just sent joan home then went home to play a bit of game, but i was just pure lazy to go church on sunday. I had a headache n overslept n Joan waited 2 hours at tpy mrt station for me.. i'm so sorry i wasted her time, but i assumed that she was not going service cos she said she slept at 6 am due to vomitting or something.. i mean, i read a SMS at 6 am in the morning, half asleep n not thinking straight, what should i expect?? anyway, next time i will switch my phone to silent mode n check SMSes only in the morning after i'm totally awake!

Spent the afternoon trying to piece together a new furniture my parents bought for $500 from ikea, too 2 hours to set up the base only! totally annoying, didn't expect it would take so long just to piece together a few pieces of wood! then joan insisted i meet her and she told me she wanted to pass the ring back to me becos she wasn't ready.

Oh God, i could've just heard my heart break there n then. I don't get it. I don't know why she would feel stressed from the ring. i mean, its just a ring. we've been living as if we're engaged anyway, so what difference would it make? i couldn't understand, and i was so angry. i use anger to cover my sadness n disappointment, becos, well, i generally don't like to show that i'm vulnerable or weak. weakness is for pussies. i threatened to throw away the ring n if she returns it i will never propose again. which is of course nonsense...

i dunno but i feel the whole engagement is a BIG mistake. i did it too rashly, i didn't give her enough time to think through it, and worse, i overreacted when she told me she was having some problem accepting the engagement. i really don't know what to do, or who to confide in because i'm going to lose a lot of face if i tell the whole truth to anyone... and my ego n pride doesn't allow that. i will never cry in front of anyone except God or Joan, i told myself that long ago..

but this whole engagemenet thing has turned into a big mess.. i got sick with rashes, i couldn't go to work on monday cos i was too upset n the rash was so bad i went to see dr kwok.. i should've asked for 2 days MC, but there's so much work in office that i know i have to force myself to go back to work.. i dunno how to deal with this. i never though i'd feel so depressed after getting engaged, i only thought we would be so happy together.. i feel like i've failed Joan, i've failed God, i've made so many mistakes..

My new year resolution not to use vulgar words was broken so easily. my other resolution to control my temper was also gone while i flared up at the yishun mrt on sunday night. i've got no more motivation to make anymore resolutions, to do anything.. i wanna quit my job n just wallow in misery at home.. this sense of chaos and failure just looms over me. sigh.

I'm sorry God, i'm sorry.. i just can't live my life right, i can't do things right without You in it..

Totally annoyed, so much work to do, so little time.. and I don't even feel motivated to do anything.

2009-11-03T16:40:00.003+08:00

Its already 5.30 pm according to the clock on my computer, I just wanted to drop a note to complain and whine about work and how much it sucks.

I don't think I can take much more of this. If this goes on, I think I will really quit my job within the next few months.

I haven't even asked for one day leave to shift house next friday, and boss is in such a foul mood, I doubt she would agree to it.. and I got so much work I haven't got the foggiest idea where to start.. or when it'll end.

Anyway back to work.. i got emails to send, documents to finalise, etc..

Sharlyn's wedding, STOMP, and various other stuff

2009-10-15T14:14:00.002+08:00

Actually wrote an entry a few days ago, but duno why when i tried to upload it, the internet connection was down, so the whole post disappeared! yes, irritating things like that does happen to blogger once in awhile. Or maybe its just my internet connection that's cranky. but anyway..

Seems like my birthday party came n went in a flash. i took days, even weeks preparing for it, and it was all over in about 3-4 hours. i still haven't gotten the photos from thomas and ziqian lah. quite annoyed by that. even my pri sch friends already posted the pics up. whats the point of being professional but SLOW?? i honestly don't care much for the quality of pics or the lighting or whatever, as long as i can nice pics of me n my friends. i think thats the problem with all those amatuer photographers out there. you think that just by buying a SRL camera from canon or whatever branded camera, u're ready to take nice pictures n produce results. honestly, most pple don't care about all the details, as long as they have nice pics to remember the occasion, the joy, the emotion, the friends and the fun. And i really think 2 weeks is a little too slow to get my pics ready lah.

But enough about annoyances, more about the good stuff.

Sharlyn's wedding was certainly eventful! Dances, video clips, strikeforce drumming performances, etc. I had 2 costume changes, and ate only like 4 of the dishes, cos we were too busy preparing for the performances! had lots of fun w darshan, ruyuan, esther, edwin, jasmine, irenus, joan n the rest practicing for the big MJ Beat It performance! at least those pics are up on facebook! rushed home to change, then went to expo svc. after expo svc we went to airport for dinner n lo and behold, ian n millie ran into liting n her boyfriend! i didn't get a chance to see him, but it was good catching up w liting for awhile, she does look skinnier n a bit haggard though. Work n studying isn't too healthy for anyone at all. After having popeye's we went to Azzucar with David n Neo for some chilling, but it turned out to be a clubbing place with loud reggae and latin music! wasn't really in the mood to club cos we were all really tired, except for David Lee and Neo of course, those guys had so much energy to dance it was really amazing! we left at about 1.30 am, cos was really too damn tired to dance much or hang out any longer.

Sunday we woke up pretty late, n had a quick meal before rushing to esplanade to watch STOMP! dunno why i found it a bit boring at parts, but maybe cos i watched before already, so i expected what they were going to do. thanks YQ for belated birthday present, i absolutely love the belt n the special buckle!

Tues nite had practice for Sat's gig, then had KFC w Meiqi at sing post while waiting for the rest to finish their prac. apparently CK, reid, julia, valerie, yuhong n jason went to Hongkong w Boon for 4 days, n they'll be back on sunday. So Shoik lah, wish i could still go on such overseas trips with them.

Watching Darah w amelie later tonight after work, cos sat she can't make it n has to visit some friends or something. Sat gig reporting time is 4 pm, so quite early also lah. its 2.30 now, another 4.5 hours to do some decent work n then meet amelie at plza sing for dinner n movie. damn, my eyes are closing, i'm sleepy n lethargic.. no motivation to finish my work at all. sigh. but no choice lah, got to do up my stuff n send out some documents by today. oh well at least thank God today is already Thursday, just 1 more working day till the weekend!!

Feeling a little out of touch..

2009-09-30T14:25:00.002+08:00

Nothing really much to update, except that Lena and her boyfriend have broken up, Amanda and her boyfriend broke up and she's now with someone new, Sebastian got attached, etc etc.. Nowadays at this age, all i'm hearing about are pple get attached or breaking up or getting married or worse, getting divorce.

I feel so out of touch with my friends, really. I don't get to meet up with SF pple n play gigs as often as I'd like to, I don't meet up with BK clarence n the guys to play LAN games anymore maybe except once every 3 months or so, I don't meet up with my old pals like christine or yongqiang at all, maybe like once every 6 months? Its quite sad n a little disturbing to know that work life takes away time spent with friends and family.

It could be that I really need a vacation. Not just a weekend getaway, but a really long vacation, maybe take leave for a whole week to chill up and catch up with friends. Of cos i still spend lots of time with Joan, and we've really been able to work on our relationship, n we haven't quarrelled for quite a long time, amazingly. Or at least the quarrels are small and minor n usually over in 15 mins.

Anyway i'm quite excited for a few things:

1) Mambo at zouk tonight w clarence, michelle, amelie, junyi, etc.
2) Chijmes dinner with family and cousins tml night at hog's breath cafe, probably followed by drinks or something
3) Friday KTV with SF pple after cell group, prob gonna sing till 2 am at least
4) Saturday don't really have anything planned, except for a music practice w Genieve, the guest violin player. I really wish my brother were here, it seems that my brother n i have literally the same or very similar taste in music, n we often really flow with each other when it comes to making music. hahaha.. but i guess sat is always fun meeting up with joan n spending time together w her.
5) sunday we got dance practice at the airport after expo svc, after which i'm gonna rush home to teach clarence, sweekeng, mikki n michelle the MJ dance for beat it, for the birthday party opening act! its only a 3 hour long party, n i've spent like days organising it. hahaha.. but i can't help it, i like holding big events and celebrations with friends! haha..

then after this weekend, next weekend is also filled with activites:

1) sharlynn's wedding at 11 am, probably gonna take up the whole day cos we need to reach by 10 am to prepare (or maybe even earlier!)
2) STOMP performance at esplanade on sunday afternoon at 2 pm! which reminds me to get the tickets from YQ, and to attend sat svc w Joan too

so many things to plan and prepare, its a hectic but fun month of october! hahaha..

Jurong Bird Park, Xiangling's 19th birthday celebration, Strikeforce gathering cum Neo's farewell party!

2009-08-31T11:48:00.002+08:00

Boss isn't in today, so finally can have some time to blog about the past weekend!

I've got like 8 matters to settle, but I don't know why I just don't have the motivation to get started on any work today. Guess I'm still feeling the effects from the enjoyable weekend that I had!

Friday night Joan went out with her friends, and I fetched her from Clark quay area around 1 am, n she stayed over at my place so we could get up early to go to JBP. Joan was worried about the weather, but I somehow knew that the weather would be good, despite of the fact that it was raining the past few days!

True enough, the weather was nice n sunny. In fact it was so hot that when we got back to the car at about 5 plus pm, Joan couldn't even sit on the seat cos the leather was so hot! Haha.. but anyway we got up quite late, around 10 am, and after quick washup, we didn't even have time to eat breakfast, we drove to JBP and reached there about 11 plus. We had already missed the first 2 shows in the morning. =P but its ok, cos we really needed the sleep! hahaha.. We spent only $18 for the tickets, cos its a one for one deal during the month of August. =)

But of cos, we spent a bit more on the food! I bought an ice cream for $3.50, the Bongo burgers meal even after 20% discount was about $22 (before was around $27). The beef bongo burger and the fish n chips were not too bad though, only the drinks were expensive. $3.50 for ice milo and $3.50 for the lemonade was already like $7!

We took a lot of pics, about 100+ photos, walked a super long distance around the bird park, from 11 am till about 5.15 pm. Joan was super amazed and impressed that in many sections, the birds were actually free to fly and roam around, visitors could get up close and personal with the many beautiful colourful and exotic birds. from the large ostrich to the tiny little red coloured small birds which could fly THROUGH the small holes in the fences, from the colourful parrots to the majestic predators, there were really so many birds to look at. the lories at the lory loft were really friendly but noisy, and the bird park sold bird food at $3 a cup. Didn't want to waste money, i would rather spend the money on human food for myself. Hahaha.. Oh, we saw one of the parrots singing a chinese song, rasa sayang, and a birthday song! Thats amazing, they no longer just say "hello", the intelligent birds can sing songs as well! i don't know if the birds are getting smarter or the trainers are getting better. haha.

i think we visited about 5 enclosures in the bird park, and the flamingo lake was really quite beautiful for weddings n events. there are probably at least 100 of those pink birds! there were a lot of swans n pelicans n herons as well, i suppose there were plenty of fish in the lake too.

Oh n joan actually went to touch a large blue pigeon n poked it. haha. those birds are really not afraid of humans anymore, probably used to seeing tourists everyday. i think the bird park is smaller than the zoo though there are more varieties of birds.

in the evening, we went to vivocity Marche for dinner to celebrate xiangling's 19th birthday. joan n i had a quick drink at the mac, cos we were so thirsty from the walking n the heat at the bird park! supposed to have about 12 pple, but in the end, everyone was late. at 7 pm only xiangling, joan n i were there. by 7.45 pm, only daryl had arrived. BK and michelle appeared later, and bowen came much later, and yishan and toonsiong were the last to arrive. The food at marche wasn't that great, but it was EXPENSIVE. not worth it, i won't go back there again. =P but its for a friend, so still ok.

We left the place around 10 plus and went to jewel box on top of mount faber, wanting to try the oreo milkshake, but sadly, they did not have that on the menu anymore. but its ok, cos the view from the toilet was very nice. the toilet itself was well designed, very high class looking, had a fish tank, and transparent glass walls facing the sentosa view! apaprently it was an award winning toilet, very beautiful and exquisite looking. had a few drinks n dessert while xiangling, michelle n joan went to find their old work colleagues. actually the view is not so nice now, cos so much construction going on in sentosa, it looks like some harbour or factory.

but anyway we talked a lot about cell group stuff, how different pple are doing, about Boonkiat's love interests, n joked about everybody and everything! it was really funny, Michelle said "BK like to play with little brother, and Momo has a little brother that BK can play with!" and then i burst out laughing, n everyone caught the meaning n we laughed until pple from other tables looked at us. hahaha! the dessert at $11.80 was totally not worth it, but joan n the rest had free drinks on the house, so not bad lah. sent XL and daryl home around 12 plus n it actually felt early n I was uploading the day's pics on fb, but joan had already fallen asleep. haha! i think it was roughly about 3 am when i finally went to bed.

the next day supposed to wake up at 8.30 to meet alicia for a short BS, then support peijin water baptism, n attend svc, but we missed everything n i woke up at about 12.30 pm! can't help it, had a bit of a fever during the night, cos Joan took all the blankets and it was really cold around 4 am! Joan prepared spaghetti and chicken for breakfast, it was satisfyingly good! we watched Simpsons n lazed around, and reached studio at about 4 pm for a short rehearsal for the song Time of Your Life by Greenday.

Neo's farewell party was an enjoyable one, lots of SF videos and even the old SF Funniest Videos made a comeback! Ian really did some nice editing and mixing for the NDP, GDOP and FOP performances, as well as the YOG performance, which sadly i wasn't able to perform for. But still, from the videos, I could see i'm still in the major performances such as NDP, GDOP and FOP, although i've not played for commerical private events much in 2009. working life is really tiring and time consuming, even if i could end work on time to rush to play for gigs, i would prefer not to, as it takes up a lot of energy and i'd have to skip dinner n rush home after the gig to get some rest. think its really time for the next generation of SF members to do the performing, while the older guys take a back seat. Hehz.. F1 in Sept, prob my last gig for the year as well as Neo's last gig in Singapore.

Anyway the food was really nice, esp the chicken and the dessert, mangopudding with cocktail. not too bad for $10. after a couple of videos, n boon's speech about UDC and SF, we sang a song for Neo, n everyone went to give him a hug. I couldn't really do it, I think I might actually cry on the day that he leaves SG! hahaha.. but anyway chowkiat did one of the best tributes to Neo, he did a drum solo for him! that was really cool, n best expression of love ever! hahaha..

Thank God for a wonderful weekend! I totally enjoyed myself, the fellowship with friends, the quality couple time with Joan. i guess what would've made it better was if i hadwent for service n heard pastor phil's sermon! =P but oh well, whats done is done, i also dunno why i felt feverish in the morning, i didn't get drenched in the rain at all. perhaps just my body overworking itself to keep up with my busy schedule! hahaha..

Alright, i've slacked the whole morning, time to eat lunch n get down to some serious work after lunch. Thank You Jesus for a fantastic, totally fulfilling weekend! One of the best weekends of 2009!! Hahaha..

Super busy weekend!

2009-08-03T12:16:00.002+08:00

Dedicated to God and CHC: Happy 20th anniversary!

Dear God,

Realised I've not blogged for quite a long time! Spending more time writing notes on facebook rather than blogging. But anyway, just an update on whats been going on in my life for the past week..

Thank You for the great and wonderful weekend! Truly, I enjoyed myself since last thursday, going for meetings and eating good food, and on Friday, my boss brought us to the top of Pan Pacific restaurant for a tim sum lunch which is really good! I will definitely bring Joan to eat there one day.

Then at 7.30 pm, while i was driving mindice home w joan in the car, chowkiat called n asked me to go for FOP SF prac at 8.30 pm! had a small disagreement w joan, but in the end we did went to the fish n chicks place at sembawang for dinner, n arrived at studio at about 9.15 pm, n practice hadn't even started yet! prac was supposed to end by 10 pm, but it dragged on until about 10.50 pm, n we started singing ktv only at about 11.15 pm if i remember correctly. not long enough man, only about 2 hours n we had to pay $12 each. we still went to Mac for a bite n chatted for a while n finally left for home about 2.15 or so. GK last min didn't come, but he said he'll pay me lah, so nevermind.. Not really satisfied w that KTV session though, will prob organise another one when we're all less busy! By the time we sent everyone home, we reached home at about 3.30 am, slept around 4 am. I actually managed to wake up at 11 am to rush for NDP preview, which is not too bad, imho! LOL! Joan was still lazing around when I was packing my stuff n left the house to drive to marina square at around 11.45.

Thank You also for giving me the energy to last through the NDP preview! I don't know why, during the rehearsal I was already perspiring like crazy, but during the actual performance, I was even more nervous n felt my throat was dry n felt a littleweak n a bit stunned at how fast things seemed to be moving! perhaps its stage fright, but considering i've performed in front of thousands of pple before, it shouldn't be stage fright.. but all in all, the NDP preview was quite good, i managed to pull off chapter 3 and 5 without much difficulty. Forgot to take my gold costume, but fortunately Red ran back to get it for me, haha. See, all things work for the good of those who love Him! I've learnt to not get angry when things don't go smoothly, and learn to be adaptive and flexible, to solve the problem rather than blame the persons responsibile for the mistake. Sure, there's a time to scold n rebuke, but when the problem presents itself, it needs to be solved before the scolding n finger pointing can behind. at least that is what i believe. to solve the most urgent problem, n finding the root of the problem or the cause only later. reacting according to the situation, rather than to emotions.

But enough w NDP preview. Janice had her birthday at D1415 at downtown east, n it hard finding a car park there! despite the new multi-storey car park, it was still super crowded. had to rush to eat my dinner, n met up w John n Mikki, n of cos the birthday girl janice. I don't even know why I consider her a friend, like a god daughter, when she's so obsessed with her looks n her modelling thing, which i doubt she can do for much longer. maybe another 3-5 years at most. but i don't like her smoking, ah beng, vulgar friends. see what happens when u backslide? =P but still, had a good time w John n Mikki, catching up w each other, sharing whats happening. John's a designer for ceramic company apparently, n Mikki has problem w an emo cg member. oh n janice has amazingly large posters of herself at her party, n we were taking many photos of those posters, quite funny! Hahaha.. after sending everyone home, i reached home about 2 am or so? second night of returning home so late! sleep depravity in motion!

Sun morning, we tried to wake up at 6.30 am for the 9 am svc, so we could reach SIS by 7.15 to join the queue to get the commemorative glass block, but in the end i was too tired, n just sms alicia that we'd go for the second service at 11.30 am. we woke up later around 10, n reached SIS around 11.20 am, just in time to find 2 seats (thanks Grace!) just before svc started. Thank God it was a celebration service w little preaching, if not i'm sure i would've dozed off! Had lunch at pastamania after svc w Joan, n even had time to drive her to meet SHufen at Suntec, before driving back to SIS for SF prac which begun only around 4 pm (supposed to meet at 3.30 pm lor, n i'm actually one of the earliest pple to reach!). The performance was only like maybe 2 min max, but it was good! Rev Canon James Wong liked it, n we hoped so did the audience.. a small crowd which occupied the floor area and a bit of the sides. =p quite pathetic, to be honest.

After dinner at ajisen ramen, i sent joan home n walked up the creaking new stairwell, then reached home at around 10 plus. so that concludes the busy n fruitful weekend! Amen!

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Now its monday afternoon at 2.22 pm, another 3.5 hours till i get to go home n sleeeeeeepp!! super sleepy n tired, n finished reaching Cain's Last Stand. not exactly one of his best books, very average story only. but anyway my eyes are still on the verge of closing, think i shouldn't have read finish the book n slept so late. but weekends are precious to me, n i honestly don't think i can do very much else besides eat n sleep on a weekday! =P

At least the actual NDP is around the corner, my final performance as part of the national day parade! time for the younger memebrs in strikeforce to grow up n take over my place. hahaha..

I don't know what to do..

2009-07-18T13:30:00.000+08:00

I should be with the guys at NDP getting ready for the preview. But I'm just so damn tired n don't feel like doing anything.

Had a big arguement with Joan last night. Well, not so much an arguement, but she was yelling at me and complaining that I don't spend enough time with her. I don't know what to say to that, I just can't be bothered to talk about it cos I think that's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.

I've got a hell lot of work left uncompleted, i'm supposed to go back to office this morning, but I really don't feel motivated to do anything now except stay home and rot. The sky looks dark like its about to rain again. I just recovered from flu, I can't afford to get sick again.

Nothing cheers me up nowadays, I just feel so moody and depressed.. Work sucks, I'm not feeling well, my girlfriend's mad at me for something I don't even understand, and I don't know what to do.

Nearing the halfway mark of 2009

2009-06-10T14:37:00.002+08:00

Had lunch w eunice today, though we didn't get to talk very much, only talking about things like buying of diamond rings, eunice's wedding plans, my anniversary celebration w joan, things n pple in strikeforce, the struggle to go to bible study, yongji's struggle to quit smoking, etc.. sounds like a lot of things, but actually just skimmed the surface of those topics. Like previously, I still felt that although there was a warm familiarity about eunice, there is also a wall or some barrier between us, not sure if its intentionally placed by her or me, or totally unintentional. Difficult to describe, but just a feeling that we're not being totally honest with each other, n we don't really joke or crap much anymore, its just talking about serious stuff n dealing with issues in our lives.. i guess that's how adults talk when they hang out? Haha.. i don't know.

Anyway its only Wednesday, midway through the work week, thank God that the weekend is coming, but also a bit sian that my saturdays are all filled up all the way until after national day, cos of SF performance for NDP.. seriously, not being able to go out with friends n girlfriend on a saturday is a major drag. by the time practice ends around 6 pm, n i rush home to take a bath n rush out to meet joan, its usually like 7.30 pm or so, n we can only spend like maybe 4 or 5 hours together before have to go home to sleep so won't over sleep for service on sunday. =P oh well at least no more work for this weekend!! (hope i don't speak too soon!)

Oh, had dinner at Lawry's Prime Rib with my family to celebrate my dad's birthday and Weiliang's sending off to australia event, on last Sunday, 7 June 2009. I know its a little late to blog about it now, but simply had no time to blog. Honestly, the steak, though very big and meaty, wasn't that well seasoned, though some of the sauces were very unique. the spinning bowl salad was good, n the mash potatoes were nice, but the steak was really too big for joan or my mum to finish on their own. infact, i even had alittle trouble finishing my own steak it was really so huge! and its only 285 grams, i wonder what a 300 gram steak looks like. hahah. took us 2 hours to finish that meal! quite a large portion of everything. cost me $342, quite reasonable, each person only about $55. won't go there if there wasn't a 1-for-1 deal for DBS card holders!

On Monday watched Blood the last vampire movie with Joan after having dinner at plaza sing w my bro n mindice, what a small world, we can actually bump into them in town! haha. oh the movie had nice slick action, n the lead actress was really hot n pretty, but aside from that, the film pretty much sucked. horrible ending, worst climax fight i've ever seen. super lame japanese trying to speak english, sounding like an idiot. thank goodness we didn't watch this on a weekend! totally not worth watching. i'll rather watch the animation lah.

Last night after work had strikeforce practice with benjamin n yingying, a new couple who met during strikeforce. Haha, seems like SF has become a place to find a partner. they're nice pple, i was surprised to find out he was from ACS(I) cos usually pple from that school are arrogant proud bastards. offence intended. haha! but benjamin seems like a nice guy, n yingying seems like a nice girl, they actually look pretty good together. hehz.

Now its 3.30 pm, another 3 hours till i pack my stuff n head home, or maybe to the lan shops to meet yongqiang, he's still deciding whether or not to play lan later. haha. if he can't meet up i'll probably go home, having a bit of flu n sorethroat. =P

2 years with Joan - anniversary celebration!

2009-06-04T13:55:00.002+08:00

Actually started going out with her on Tues nite 2 June, cos it was Irenus birthday and we celebrated for her with a dinner at the Japanese place at the basement of grand cathay. Can't remember the place, but Joan n i last ate there with Ian n millie about 1 or 2 months ago, i think. Pple at irenus dinner were yongqiang, valerie, julia, jiali, christine, shuting, joan n myself, and of cos irenus. Jasmine, the organiser, wasn't there by the time i reached (about 8.50 pm or so, if i remember).

Went to Cafe cartel for a drink after Irenus n shuting went to watch movie, (its was basically for my benefit cos i haven't eaten dinner, n honestly the food at cartel isn't that great, just like a normal food court food) n just chilled out n talk n talk with the SF pple. i was wondering why millie n ian weren't invited though, maybe they're too busy. =P

Anyway the main event started on Wed morning, we woke up at 9 n saw the rain clouds, n i began to think i needed a plan B, becos if it rains, we can't go walking around macritchie reservoir anymore right? but turns out that after our ba chor mee breakfast, the weather seemed quite nice after all. thanks God! You knew it was our anniversary n prevented the rain from spoiling it! Haha..

I think we walked about 14 Km or more from 10.15 am at the car park, until we reached the tree top walk, and walked back to the reservoir area, and reached the car again at about 1.45 pm. Thats roughly around 3.5 hours! If you think that's slow, you should try walking the path man. Rockly, muddy, sloping up and down, some steep slopes here n there, insects flying around, etc, it was like going thru field camp in army all over again! Hahaha.. exciting events / highlights include the encounter with a colourful thin small snake on the suspended bridge, me climbing over the fence to unlock the gate of the bridge (becos we went the wrong way n the gate was closed from the other side so i had to climb over n unlock it), the seemingly endless flights of stairs, the stork / pelican birds we saw, the cute tortoise that seemed to understand what I said, n several other instances where joan shrieked n grabbed my arm so suddenly i also freaked out. Haha! thank God Joan had the sense to bring a bottle of water, if not we would've suffered from dehydration in the jungle! but it wasn't that hot anyway, quite good weather, cloudy with a little bit of drizzle to wash away the heat. but seriously, i won't go back there at least for the next few years, too tiring n non-romantic place! Haha.. i hope Joan really had fun, trudging thru the jungle tracks n mud, getting sand in our shoes n perspiring n panting! Haha.. actually it was kind of fun, but i didn't know joan was afraid of heights. =P but angmohs must be damn fit lah, we saw several ang mohs, even 2 mums pushing a pram with a baby, trekking at the reservoir, n they were walking even faster than us. oh, n joan saved me from injury, i almost walked into a few branches cos i usually don't look at where i'm walking, prefer to look around n enjoy the greenery instead. Haha.

Took a few pics, shall upload them later tonight or maybe this weekend, depending on when I'm free.

Had lunch at thomson plaza becos dino had no parking lots available, we did consider walking over to dino from thomson plaza, but i was simply too tired n too hungry to really want to walk some more! the chicken chop wasn't tht good n the drinks were expensive! $2 for a canned drink is really ridiculous.

We reached home at about 2.35 pm, took a bath n rested, and then rushed to omnitheatre to try to make it for the 4 pm show, but we reached the ticket counter at about 4.05 pm, and the person said that the show would've started by the time we walked over to the theatre, and its only a 40 min show, so we should just catch the later show at 6 pm. so we ended up paying an extra $2.80 to go to the science centre for 2 hours to kill time before the show. and to our surprise, even though we already went to science centre last year, there were quite a few new stuff n exhibits that we haven't tried before, n there were some areas only for school kids, n there were DNA labs n classes on animation for school children, which i think should be quite fun! how come there were no such things during my primary school n sec sch days! Hahah.. Joan n i had fun playing with the various exhibits at the science centre until about 5.45 pm, then we walked to the omnitheatre for the 40 min show on Sea Monsters. was about this weird looking water dinosaur called a "polly" or something, n how she lived among the other creatures in the sea during the dinosaur age. quite interesting, but i was so sleepy that i actually dozed off for a few minutes in the middle of the show, but the big fight between the 2 giant monsters was interesting n woke me up. i think each of those creatues was like 25-30 feet in length. I think 3 feet is about 1 meter, so estimate about 10 meter long monster! thats quite big, more than 5 times the height of a human. but i actually wanted to watch the Grand Canyon show but it ended its showing in Oct 2008 last year. =P nevertheless i enjoyed myself, the Polly thingys were quite cute, despite having rows of sharp teeth! hahaha.. Joan said they look like a cross between a dolphin n penguin.

Had dinner at the pasta cafe at basement of taka instead of Lawry's prime rib. I think i'll reserve that place for a more significant occasion. Haha. Anyway there are lots of anniversaries n birthdays to go for Joan n i, plenty of opportunity to eat there again. Although i think we will go there soon, since there's a promotion of a 1-for-1 for DBS credit card holders. Hehz..

Somehow i felt the day sort of felt unfinished, cos usually we end the day with a romantic movie or something, but we already watched night at the museum 2 on Monday evening, so no more good shows for us to catch! NTM2 was really funny though, i don't mind watching again actually! haha. but anywayz.. just sat at the fountain n chatted with Joan after giving her our anniversary present. Nothing grand, just one thousand dollars into her account. I'm sort of ashamed of not getting her a card n celebrating with her property, but i guess i'm really quite busy n don't have the time to plan out everything like i used to. =P

but anyway to cut a long story short, we had an enjoyable day. I feel so loved n thank God that I've got such a cute n loving girlfriend and soon-to-be wife. Haha! can't wait to propose actually, only thing that's holding me back is that the house isn't gonna be built until Nov 2011, and thats really really long time coming. n in the meantime i've still got to save up $$ for the wedding, the renovation, the honeymoon, the ring, n all sorts of other expenses. getting married is stressful! but of cos also exciting lah. you don't really know what to expect no matter how well u plan for things to happen, but the good thing is, i'm not doing it alone anymore. Joan will be there to help n support me, and will be there for me for the rest of my life. =) thats why i don't let her do jobs like air stewardess, cos i don't like her being away from me for too long. u can say i'm selfish, but if that's what it takes to make a relationship work, then i think its worth it.

Great night out with Pri 6 class mates!

2009-05-18T01:35:00.002+08:00

Dear God,

Its been a long time since I last blogged / prayed on whats happening in my life. I remember just on Thursday night I was crying while I prayed for Joan's exam paper for economics.. not because I was so intensely praying for her until I cried, but rather when I was praying, I felt like I've wandered so far from You this year.

To be honest, I've really not gone to church for more than 1 month. Watched service online, sometimes just can't be bothered to watch at all, cos i'm so busy with work. Or sometimes just plain lazy and need sleep.

I think I've gotten my priorities all wrong, now everything I do is for my job, everything centers upon excelling at my job, getting my work done, getting the deals in and getting more money. Its like somehow, I've totally forgotten about my promises to God to always put Him first, to fulfil the basic requirements of service and cell group. I know there's the whole cultural mandate thing going on, but when I'm just pure lazy to go for service, I know there's something seriously wrong with my spiritual life.

God I admit I need help.. I think I shall speak to Shaun or Yujie about this. I'm not yet too familiar with Alicia, as friendly and nice as she may be, I don't know if she understands what I'm going through.. True, I never did give her a chance as I don't confide in her at all, which what I'm supposed to do.. Be accountable to my leader. It seems the more financially stable I become, the more I feel I'm in control, the less I see the need to be accountable. All my old flaws flaring up again, rebelliousness, pride, stubborness to change.

Initially I wanted to blog about the great time I had with my friends, Kelly and his wife, Liangfeng, Junhao, Jiayong, Lishan, Shujun, and to a lesser extent, Yockwei. And I wanted to complain about how fake some pple can be, after listening to Liangfeng's story which Yingyan told him while at St James 2 weekends ago. I was supposed to go with them, but was too caught up at work (again!). These guys are really nice pple (with the exception of Yockwei, I really don't like the way he tries to portray he's living the high n fast paced life, like he's rich or something, when obviously all of us can see through his pretentiousness..) especially Kelly, we were talking the whole night through various topics from games to marriage to divorce to education, and we were really hitting it off like old friends, and I really do miss hanging out with him.. we had a nice steam boat dinner, the soup was really good, and we chilled out at TCC at clark quay for a good 1.5 hours at least, n i really enjoyed the fellowship..

But when i got home n i was thanking You for a good time with my pri sch friends, I also realised something. I don't feel the presence of God when I'm fellowshipping with them, which is the difference when I fellowship with strikeforce or other church friends. When I was at Mikki's birthday. Heck, even when I was playing LAN with boonkiat and daryl. I mean yeah, those guys like computer games n we have fun, but they love You too. Daryl still attends his church faithfully, and BK, despite being in army still serves security ministry n attends his own service. Those guys put me to shame. I ought to be the one on fire for God even more, leading more pple to You every year, shining in the market place, and in the church as well. But i seem to be drifting further and further away from you, and cooking up excuses why I can't go for service.

I mean for cell group, I really do have to work OT and have valid reasons for missing them, but for service I really should go. To not experience the intense presence of God for a month, to not be able to be refreshed in Your presence, to not read the bible, to not absorb the truths in Your Word, its really taking its toll on me. I feel lethargic n energyless all the time, I'm back to my old bad habits of scolding vulgarities and cursing and swearing at pple, my hot temper is acting up, i'm becoming more quarrelsome n easily agitated.. God, I've even scolded Joan last night for interrupting my game play.

I need You God, more than ever. You and only You can keep my behaviour in check, n can guide me to the right path. I need to learn to love You again, to follow You again, to put You first in my life again.. and it so tough. I find that there are few pple that I can trust, after seeing all the Christians give up hope on backsliders, how would I know pple won't just give up hope on me? For all I know, my cell members may already be viewing me n Joan in a different way... Am i being overly sensitive or paranoid, or do I feel I just can't fit in with them? Like they're excluding us or even snubbing us in some way? I dunno.. I'm not holy enough to hang out with them or something. Haiz, sarcasm isn't going to get me anywhere and I know it.

The lyrics of the worship songs just came to me..

Lord we need Your grace and mercy
We need to pray like never before
We need the power of the Holy Spirit
To open heaven's door

Spirit touch Your church
Stir the hearts of men
Revive us, Lord
With Your passion once again
I want to care for others
Like Jesus cares for me..
Let Your rain, fall upon me..

Oh God, let Your Words sink deep into my soul, into my spirit man.. revive the dead passion I have for You, awaken the spiritual man in me! I need to break free of this routine of work, work, work, and money money money, and see that there is more to life than just meeting my own needs, surviving in my own world. Let me open up my eyes to Your will once again God! Let me enjoy being in Your presence, worshipping You, praising You, giving thanks to You once again!

I know that You are ever there, waiting for me to come back, and I am coming back to the heart of worship.. I will come back, and I will stay in Your will and Your presence once again. I need time to open up Lord, but I will pray and read Your Word again, I will try my best.

God, I put my trust in You. Help me when all else fails, help me get through to You once again.

In Jesus name,
Amen

Tired and no mood to work..

2009-04-27T21:11:00.002+08:00

Past 2 weeks have been quite crazy, spent the weekend working from morning till morning.. the next morning, that is.

Its been crazy, i'm getting really sleepy n dizzy n i can feel a headache developing.. i think i better go home n sleep immediately after work.. and i hope the company sends the OIS info only later in the morning.. really cannot take it much longer. i think by thurs when we send out the documents for submission i will really faint after submitting the stuff to SGX.. i hope we can do a submission by Thurs late morning, like around 12 noon, so afternoon can relax in office n have a nice long lunch liao. =P

Happy Easter 2009! Almost 1/3 of the year 2009

2009-04-13T11:01:00.003+08:00

Monday morning on 13th April 2009.

Dragged my feet to work after a long weekend, woke up on time but lazed around in bed until I was late for work by about 15 min. Hehz.

The Easter drama was alright, not exactly what we expected, cos the postcard looked sort of like a matrix thingy, but it was still set in early Jerusalem during Jesus time. Interesting concept, but lacking in story development, the characters were very one dimensional, the only good acting came from the main guy, who always played Peter, or John the Baptist last year. Was kind of hoping for a more traditional easter drama actually, cos the Final Solution thing was quite good for a modern play n is thought provoking, but seriously has nothing much to do with the Easter message, or at least in my opinion, they could have linked it to modern times and do a flash back thingy like last year's I-Ming. but anyway, the show didn't really impact me that much, guess i'm becoming a little immune to the same repeated scenes every year.

Anyway, the highlight of the weekend was really the Strikeforce MTT at east coast combined with BBQ. After Easter service, we hung out at the career booths at hall 7 for awhile, then i went for lunch with Joan while sending her to the library to study, bumping in to Chowkiat at the beer garden kopitiam! Haha, its a small world.

At the ECP, we did basically the same things which we did at the boot camp, practice playing far away from each other, n there was a short 40 min class conducted by 6 various groups of instructors (made up of Strikeforce seniors) and then the usual talk by Boon, and the announcement of the group who is taking part in NDP. Not alot of pple actually, only slightly about half of the new pple.

BBQ was fun though, i got to talk to many new members, David, Ee Lin, jeanette, rica, erika, wilson, abel, n a coupple of other new pple. G-ladys, the 11 year old little girl, is quite cute, the cutest girl we got in SF so far, IMHO! hahaha.. also caught up with the older SF pple like Meiqi, David Lee, YQ, Liting, Darshan, Sharlyn, etc. It was really a very fun gathering and I totally enjoyed myself, even though there wasn't enough food n I had to ask Joan to buy some food from Mac for me, the staple food of rice n noodles were barely enough to feed the new SF pple, but many of the older SF pple didn't even get a chance to eat the staple food, but its alright, the event is mainly to welcome the new pple into SF n get them integrated. Most of them i can safely say are well integrated and can really mix well with the SF memebrs. many kids can click with the younger ones like Christine and Verena, but there are also the older members like Ralph and Wilson and Red. Really had a great time, chatting with different groups of pple, just chilling n sharing stories. Oh, small Desmond likes someone that Neo knows, and Neo's gonna help him and show him how to whoo the girl! Hahaha.. Oh, and I remember i mentioned that Verena and Daryl were wearing the same t-shirt Adidas, only in opposite colours, Daryl was like "alright Verena high five!" then Verena hestitantly raised her hand slowly and gave a super funny look of bewilderment! Oh man, it was so classic, Neo, Jasmine, Christine n i burst out laughing!

As usual, Boon wanted a 5 min sketch from each of the 6 groups on how coming to the SF has changed them, and what they aspire to be in the SF, and, as usual, (hahaha) the group that I was helping won! David, Jeanette, Ee Lin, Ivan and 2 other girls (i actually didn't catch their names) acted in the 5 min sketch, of which they developed the story line and dialouge, but I helped to put in the funny bits (suaning Ian, the last line at the end, etc) and I was really proud of them when they won. Haha! On a side note, YQ's acting as the stranger was really so "uncle" and funny! Really the clown of the night! Overall, the sketches were quite good, considering that they had only like 20 min or so to discuss. But one thing about the BBQ food, some really not cooked properly, I had stomacheache last night n this morning! Hahaha.. thank God Joan brought me some food, if not I'll really be starving by the time I got home. =P

The Ultimate Crossover: L4D, Resident Evil, Space Marines, etc!

2009-04-02T10:16:00.006+08:00

"I'm not gonna make it!" Louis stammered, as he limped painfully, supported by Francis. His left ankle was swollen and it hurt like hell, after a Smoker dragged him along the road for several meters before Francis rescued him.

"Yes you are, now shut up and keep shooting!" Francis fired a round from his shot gun, blowing 2 infected to bloody chunks of flesh, as they struggled to get to a safe house.

Zoe and Bill were ahead, blasting a pathway through the hordes of infected, blowing them away with hand guns and carbines, but careful to conserve ammunition, which was relatively difficult to come by. Bill mentally counted every shot fired from his carbine, knowing that every head shot mattered, as he felt the weight of his remaining 2 ammo clips in his pouch. Zoe fired more freely, as her dual hand guns had a large supply of ammuniton, as she kept a few boxes of hand gun rounds in her backpack and jacket pockets, which would make up maybe 500 rounds, since one small box contained 20 bullets. Still, she tried to go for headshots to conserve ammo for the rest of the team, since they all took the 7 mm hand gun rounds from her.

The 4 of them had been running and gunning for the past 3 days, heading toward Mercy Hospital. None of them knew if there was any more un-infected humans left in the city since the terrible incident of the Umbrella Corporation a week ago. An explosion at the Umbrella's Research Laboratories spread a virus known only to employees of Umbrella as the T-virus. Civilians panicked and rushed to get away from the vicinity of the explosion, and ambulances, fire fighters and police rushed to the Labs to try to rescue survivors.. Turning into the first batch of infected themselves, as the airborne virus was breathed in by them.

The blast propelled the dangerous T-virus over a raduis of 2 miles, and soon every person within that radius had become infected to a certain extent. Most became mindless, bloodthirsty zombies, but a few became mutated creatures which hunted and craved for more survivors.

The local police and security forces were ill-equipped to deal with such a situation. They tried cordoning off 10 city blocks to prevent the infected from spreading out, but their barricades could not hold against the onslaught of thousands of infected who rushed out from the buildings to attack any living humans. The mayor panicked and quickly arranged for an evacuation for himself, and called in the army to assist the local law enforcers.

Tanks, 5 ton trucks carrying troops, APCs and light attack vehicles soon filled the streets, supported by a few helicopters and fighter planes which made a few carpet bombings to clear the streets for the ground troops to move in. Street fighting broke out everywhere, with civilians taking the law into their own hands, mixing it up with the army, police and infected.

To make matters worse, the mutated infected wreacked havock in the city, destroying military vehicles and killing scores of troopers. Infected Tanks, hugely muscled monstrous zombies, easily flipped the army tanks over, and pounded the trucks aside. Smokers strangled helpless victims, as hunters pounced on others and slashed them to ribbons. Lickers, a sort of combination of a smoker and hunter, ran along walls and took out soldiers along the flanks, while Nemesis zombies similar in bulk to the Tanks, with huge eyes on their shoulders, simply smashed their way through the military defences, feeling no pain from the dozens of bullets striking them. Even domesticated animals like dogs became infected, and grew in size and ferocity. Giant alligators emerged from the city's sewers, chomping their way through helpless civilians or soldiers alike.

"Come on, wake up!" Francis slapped Louis again, this time the sting really woke Louis up. He must have lost conciousness and dreamt about the events of the past week again. Louis found his ankle wrapped up and his cuts and bruises patched up with bandages.

"We were lucky enough to find you." A lady in military fatigues smiled as she spoke. Behind her stood a few more armed personnel, dressed in miliary fatigues like the woman who spoke to him. "My name is Alice. Pleased to meet you! We've been searching for survivors since this whole incident started, but have no managed to find any.. until we came across you guys."

"We would've made it out ourselves anyhow.." Bill grumbled. He wasn't used to being rescued by women, not matter how biologically superior they may be. "So whats the plan now? We were headed to Mercy Hospital, there was a radio broadcast saying that there was some helicopters which would evacuate survivors on a daily basis. You guys gonna join us?"

"We have our orders.. we can't leave the city yet. We've got to secure some.. articles." A muscular blonde tough guy spoke. He seemed to have the highest rank of a 1st sergeant, but his stern face looked intimidating enough. His army fatigue had the name "Nickolai" on it. "Marcos! How is that policewoman doing?" He turned his attention elsewhere, apparently another person was injured.

Marcos answered, "She's doing fine sergeant! The blow from the Nemesis must have stunned her for awhile, but she's up and getting her weapons again. She's a persistent one, thats for damn sure.. Jill, give it a break! You're going to get yourself killed out there alone!"

Bill looked angry, "Your orders? You mean the military has other objectives besides rescueing survivors?? I should've known those top brass had something to do with this horrible mess!" A war veteran, Bill knew the politics and forces at play were far more sinister than he could imagine. He had enough of a lifetime of fighting during the Iraqi war, and thought his shooting days were behind him.. until this happened.

Jill Valentime glared at Nickolai as well and nodded. "Yes..especially when the top brass is being sponsored by Umbrealla Corporation!"

Alice looked at Jill in bewilderment. "Are you sure about this?"

Nickolai shouted, "Everyone shut up! We saved your sorry butts out there so just shut up alright? We've got to find this device and bring it back with us, that's all! Without Umbrella, you wouldn't even be here in the first place!"

The roar of a nearby hunter broke the tension in the room they were in. And hunters never worked alone.

I never get around to finishing my stories.. haha..

2009-04-01T16:16:00.002+08:00

I just realise that i'm stuck again.. no more creative juice or energy to complete my space marines story featuring the strikeforce members. perhaps thats becos i've introduced too many characters for a proper focus on the main storyline, and plus i've actually forgotten how i wanted to end the story cos i didn't write the main idea down on a piece of paper! hahaha..

anyway, happy 21st birthday to a sweet ex-RGS girl from the Strikeforce! will be getting a belated present for her, cos Joan reminded me to get it! =P how can i not give a friend a present on the 21st birthday! thats like the most important birthday ever. hahaha..

anyway puikwan's sick today and on MC (i think both of us take MC on alternate weeks! haha..) n i've to cover her duties n correspond with her clients today. not too difficult, fortunately, as i've dealth with those clients before, n they're really nice.

seriously, puikwan and i are quite scarily alike in many ways, we r late for work on the same days, we have the same skin problem, even fall sick on the same day once (haha, both of us took MC on the same day, imagine that), we both love to talk about movies and shopping, n we value friendship above material wealth, n we're both born in october! she always likes to say that i'm her long lost brother, and i must admit, she really is like a little sister to me rather than a colleague. i have to take care of her by teaching her how to talk to some unreasonable clients, have to comfort her cos she will cry when very stressed or get scolding from client, and she often corrects many mistakes which i overlook in my work, or point out inconsistencies and errors which i can't handle, so i think we make a pretty good working team! honestly i'm really thankful that God place such friends in my life, Puikwan, Hongyee and even Shuhon, to help me in my work n make life bearable in the miserable office. =P i know that even if i leave DLP or if any of them leave the firm to greener pastures, our friendship will remain.

Joan's exams are coming n she's spending a heck of a lot of time studying n studying n studying.. and i'm surprised she doesn't feel stressed cos i feel stress just looking at her notes and seeing her struggle with her work! there's times when i really wanna watch a movie, or go somewhere nice to eat dinner n have a romantic night out, the last time we really went out on a date was when i gave her Mr Balloon (hahaha, its still floating after a month!) and we had a nice lunch at manhattan fish market n watched the Watchmen.. since then, all we've ever done together is sit down n study. or rather, she studies, i teach her or attempt to try to teach her cos my memory of basic law is so bad, or she studies n i play computer games or read books.. sure, its spending time together, but its not quality time.. i don't like it when she's distracted n worried about the exams, n how she's having fun studying with her friends n sch, n i seem to be play such a small part of her life, i can't do much except accompany her to study.. sigh.. i just hope after her exams she'll be free enough for us to go out on proper dates, shopping trips, maybe even a short day trip to pulau ubin or sentosa, or maybe overnight stay at bintan.. i dunno, anyting just to get out of the mundance activities of everyday life.

really feel like going out with friends, but pple are jus too busy with their own lives.. the SF pple r busy with trainings n gigs which i can't play in cos i'm working till 7 pm everyday, my cg members, well, i don't even bother going out with them cos i don't click with them at all, my ex-cg members, some in army, some working, i really wonder who's free to accompany me for a short meal n maybe a drink to chill out or something.. after becoming a working adult, my circle of friends have shrunk so much. not that i don't have friends, but i don't spend time going out with them as much as i'd like.

Discovering the thrill of Left 4 Dead versus mode, Strikeforce gathering 2009, getting sick on my leave day, and best friend Lewis coming back!

2009-03-26T16:19:00.002+08:00

Well, the title just about sums up what has happened since my last post.

Had a nice dinner with the SF guys n the new pple, though there was almost friction between Ian and Liting, I think the dinner was alright. Fiona came back to Strikeforce! The cool girl with the blue hair, is how I always remember her. LOL..

I'm not feeling too good now, still having a bit of sore throat n flu, difficulty breathing and keep sneezing, plus on top of that, my skin rashes are flaring up again. sigh.. all over my arms and back and behind my knees. really quite itchy and painful as well.. i've booked an appt with skin centre on 15 April already, hopefully they'll be able to give me some meds which are effective in the long run!

damn tired also, not enough sleep from last night, cos the horrible itch was keeping me awake.. i wanna just quickly go home n sleep tonight..

Tired, lack of sleep.. Wish i can take an extended holiday!

2009-03-19T10:10:00.002+08:00

Took a day leave on tuesday for no apparent reason, but just to take a day off n chill with friends.

Went L4D with Millie, Ian, Yuhong and Nic from about 11.30 pm till about 5.30 am in the morning! 6 hours in total, only $7.50, so quite cheap leh, cheaper than watching a movie!

Oh n before that, went to love the world cafe for swing dance lessons with daniel, audrey n mukhali. met some new pple, learnt the swing dance for free, so not bad lah. 2 instructors were present, a long with a few helpers to teach the public the swing dance. they performed lindy hop and jazz dances as well, really cool and looks fun! due to back ground in rock n roll dance, i picked up the swing dance quite easily, its really similar to rock n roll. 6 step basic, with the usual turns and changing place. Had a bit of finger food snack n drinks too, was surprised that they serve wanton and curry puff.

Anyway we L4D until tues morning, then had breakfast at the kopitiam till about 6 plus, then took cab home. its ok cos i shared with millie n nic, so reached home about 7 am, bathed, slept about 7.45 am till 2.30 pm! hey its not that much, only about 7 hours plus of sleep leh. haha.

arranged to meet up w bowen n daryl n bk for movie n dinner, but daryl didn't wanna watch movie n bk, well he over slept, think he woke up at about 5 pm! crazy fella, wonder what he was doing at night! watched the very stupid, crappy, ridiculously lame and low budget dragonball evolution. only thing worth watching was chi chi fight. the romance scenes were horribly awkward, chow yung fatt is totally unsuited for the role, the action scenes were far too short, only Hame Hamma Ma or something, then the bad guy is defeated already. The audience (mainly teenagers) were laughing throughout the show and making fun of the stupid lame characters. Really horribly done show, but ok lah, i guess the entertainment factor is there, i'm entertained becos the show is so stupid and funny! Haha.. met up w Daryl for dinner at BK, then went for SF practice with Joan at joo chiat.

Finally having my first proper gig for 2009! feels good to be hitting a drum n performing once again! man i've really lost touch with my 16s and snare parts, but can't be helped, where to find time to practice, given my busy schedule.. playing sudo this time round, with the octopus sudo! heavy man! hahaha..

Tonight going out with my new SF team, leader is Ian, helpers are Liting, Rallen and another guy i dunno who! Got about 10 new pple under us, so about 2-3 new guys for each of us veterans to train, i guess its a good ratio. Provided that Rallen turns up lah. Haha..

Keeping in touch with friends

2009-03-11T12:10:00.002+08:00

I've realised something during my short work life of about 1 year 2 months, that when you work, you hardly have time for friends.

The only way I maintain contact with friends is through facebook, purposefully organised gatherings, church-related events, or once in a long while, last minute outings.

I used to hang out with Strikeforce pple like Boon, Ian, Neo, Millie, Liting, Yongqiang, Lianghong, Chaokiat, Nic, Lingling, etc, for hours and hours every week, either at practices, rehearsals, or just waiting to play a gig. Now its like, I don't have time to go for MTT, and after MTT the rest usually have practice for some upcoming gig and have to go studio or something. I really miss hanging out with them, performing with them.

And how about my cell group members? I only see them during service and cell group. Kinda hard to meet on weekdays given that we've got like zero common interest aside from God and church.

And my ex-cell group members? I only maintain constant contact with Boon kiat, Daryl, Clarence, Bowen cos of gaming interest, and of cos Michelle, Mikki and Yishan due to our closer friendship, the rest are simply not free to go out all the time. I try to meet up with Yongqiang and Yujie at least once every few months.

And besides church friends, i've got primary sch friends, JC friends, and other friends whom i've known n missed along the way. Old friends like Christine, Lewis, etc.

And whatever time I have, I try to spend with Joan cos I know she is struggling with her school and exams, and its my duty to encourage and support her. Afterall, she is my girlfriend and takes priority over everyone else. And I even miss her when I don't see her for a few days.

I'm surprised that on a weekday when i end work early, i go home eat dinner and read comics and sleep early and still feel lethargic the next day! I really cannot believe i get so tired so easily after work, when just a year ago, i would still go out almost daily to meet friends after work.

Of cos another factor is the finances i have.. i've given a lot for the building fund. even though the church website only registers $1600, which is WRONG cos i know i have given at least $3200, i felt really pissed off that the church can have such wrong info. i sacrifice a hell lot to give my building fund, and this isn't the first time the numbers are wrong. And besides the building fund and tithe which combined makes about $1200, i'm contributing $1200 monthly for a joint account. Which leaves me with only a little over $1200 to survive for the rest of the month.

After paying my bills ($70), topping u fare card, taxi trips ($200 approx), offerings and cell group fund ($100), insurance ($250), i have only about $600 for food and enjoyment. Think that's a lot? Assuming I spend $10 a day on food on working days, thats $200. Thats $400 left for me to spend on weekends. Divided by 8 days, thats $50 per weekend. I watch one movie with joan and have a nice dinner with her, easily $50-60. Last weekend I definitely spent more than that already, having a nice dinner with Jessie as well.

I mean, I'm living on the allowance of an NSman. They don't need to pay for food and lodging and get $450 to blow on weekends and I have even less than that to spend. Its freaking ridiculous when i think about it. My brother, going through NS, is earning more than me becos he isn't paying for anything and gets about $700 a month through his wedding videos.

And pple claim that being a lawyer means i'm rich. I really feel like punching those pple who say that to me. I grin and remain silent, cos i'm known for being a nice guy, and i know its not right to react with violence, but still i feel irritated and upset when pple make such remarks.

A nice weekend with Joan, The Watchmen movie, and ex-cg dinner with Jessie!

2009-03-09T11:08:00.002+08:00

Dear God,

What a wonderful weekend! I feel so blessed to have had such a great weekend with the people I love and cherish. Thank you Lord for enabling me to spend a nice weekend relaxing instead of rushing back to office to work on a Sunday or saturday afternoon!

Its been really horrible, i've got to work either on Sat or Sun for the past 1 month or so, I've never had a proper weekend to rest. Even when I had a weekend to rest last week, it felt like the weekend just zoomed past and i hardly had a moment to properly savour the moment, but still it was good, i'm gonna take a day leave either this coming Friday or next Monday, to reward myself for the work done so far.

On Saturday, went to get the balloons from the shop, which i ordered on Friday night. i thought it was quite cheap at $35 for the set of balloons, but apparently according to Joan, i got cheated, like every other guy who wants to buy balloons for the girlfriend! i really have no idea how much is the price of such balloons, i was expecting a range between $20-40, so $35 was still within my budget.

Anyway, picked it up from the shop at 11.30 am, and went to PS manhattan fish market for lunch n to wait for Joan to be pleasantly surprised by the balloon! oh and what a coincidence, we ate at the manhattan fish market, and the movie was about DR MANHATTAN! hahaha.. but anyway we took some pictures of the balloon, its still in my handphone, gonna upload it tonight. i have not seen a movie with Joan for so long, i almost wanted to cry cos i missed her. but yet she has to study harder for her exams, n i need to constantly motivate n encourage her, n i need some encouragement myself too.. Sigh, doesn't matter, God is the strength of my heart, i should be leaning on Your strength more n not depending on Joan to encourage me all the time.

I think Joan n i really enjoyed the Watchmen. it has everything, a good story line with many twists, superheroes, plenty of fighting, slow-mo effects, violence, gadgets, jokes, romance between unlikely people, politics, etc.. literally everything that you like in a movie, its in the Watchmen! i don't understand how can the newspapers rate it only 1 star, it is really a thought-provoking n for its time, revolutionary storyline, that isn't afraid to showcase the destructive nature of humanity. From the naked Bluie, to the fake fat Batman, and the pyscho guy in the changing mask with the rapsy voice, all the characters were too cool n realistic. haha!

i really wouldn't mind watching again, or perhaps get the DVD for the movie. would've loved to see more of the Comedian though, a classic anti-hero, barely fighting for the side of good, but being manipulated by the govt.

Anyway after the 3 hour movie, we spend about half an hour deciding where to go, then went up to the Equinox to take a look at the view.. the view is really spectacular and breath-taking. We really could see most of singapore from that view, parts of malaysia as well. i'm thinking, i should bring Joan there more often, since we both like the view so much. perhaps even make plans to pop the question there? Haha..

Had dinner at Dino's and then went to my house for a short while, then went to fetch my bro from merchant court hotel, and have supper at toa payoh. It was good spending time with my bro n mindice, i'm so glad mindice n joan can get along well! that's an unexpected blessing in our lives.

Sunday service was pretty alright, pst Tan continuing in the marriage series of sermons. Had SF recruitment after service, and then went for dinner with Jessie, Janice, Yujie, Yongqiang, Eunice. Colin last min couldn't make it, otherwise it would've been noisier and lamer! Haha.. it was really good seeing all of them again. Having Yujie n yongqiang as my two "elder brothers" giving me advice on working n marriage preparation, i really appreciate them n thank You for bringing them into my life. Didn't really get to talk to Eunice very much cos was engaged in quite a serious conversation with Yujie over shares, options, family planning, etc. He's really a very inspirational leader, and I'm glad to have his advice.

Dinner at Ma maison wasn't that great, i've always wanted to try the food at that place, and Jeanette said it was quite good, but turned out a bit disappointing, and the price was well, pricey. After dinner, we had a bit of supper at TCC near MOS at clark quay area, chatted and hung out until about 11 pm. Overall, had a lot of fun, but also a lot of thought provoking n advice given by my friends. Thank God for such good friends, who can actually add value to my life.

Chilling out at Love the World Cafe

2009-03-06T10:07:00.003+08:00

Last night went to Love the World Cafe for free jamming with my bro n his guitarist Hanyuan, as well as Audrey n her friend Chantelle (sp?). Had a great time there, listening to the resident band, they were really quite good, singing a mix of Christian songs and pop songs, very tight and the keyboardist Melvin was quite skillful, super pai seh when he asked me to play on stage cos i really can't play very well! but just for the fun of it lah, anyway at least i knew the song they wanted to jam. My bro played I will survive with his guitarist, and the pub bosses seemed impressed. Haha. Reached home at about 1 plus, n slept at 2.30 am. Woke up this morning around 7.50 am and am zombified in office now. Haha.

Been sleeping for only about 5 hours for the past few days, hopefully cell group ends early so can go home n rest tonight. Tml is the last day of going out with Joan, i hope the cinemas aren't too crowded, i wanna catch the Watchmen tml!

Part 6: "Reinforcements have arrived!"

2009-03-03T15:16:00.003+08:00

Time seemed to crawl to a standstill as Grifter helplessly watched his team get overrun by the Wicked Orkas.

He could see in such detail, the look of despair mixed with rage as Reid thrashed about wildly, green muscled beings surrounding him from all sides, and Shona gripping the combat blade with the last reserves of strength in her, slashing and stabbing at the circle of Orkas, while Yuri's armour cracked with a group of Orkas stomping on him, roaring with triumph and eagerness to destroy the armour to attack the human within.

Even as he slashed his way toward them, he knew he could not reach them in time, not with Rallen hanging on limply on his back. Beside him, Yonq Iang's face was bloodied with human and Ork blood, his cape shredded and torn, but still fought on with crackling energy from within. Destiny and Sharlynette also fought alongside Grifter desperately, but knew they were merely delaying the inevitable.

Inside Grifter's power armour, alarms were going off and notices were flashing. "Armour integrity at 28% and dropping." "15 bolt rounds remaining." "Recommend immediate medical treatment for wound on left thigh, administering nanobots now." He shut them all out and concentrated only on 1 thing - taking down as many Orkas as possible in his final battle. But then, a message came, flashing amber. "Reinforcements have arrived. ETA in 10.. 9.. 8.." He could almost see the hope flaring up in his teams faces, even though they had their helmets on!

Streaming clouds of smoke, the Space Marine Drop Pods came screaming out of the sky. Rallen, though losing both his legs, gave a whoop of joy, while Destiny and Sharlynette shrieked in delight. Several Orkas were momentarily distracted and looked up at the sky, wondering what was making that sonic boom that resonated over the battle field, although most simply carried on the carnage.

"Brace for impact." the voice in Grifter's helmet instructed.

3 Drop Pods came smashing down extremely near Grifter's team, crushing several dozen Orkas, and throwing other Orkas to the ground in the impact. In a moment, the doors slammed down, crushing more Orkas on the ground, and out came the reinforcements!

"Into the maelstorm of battle!" yelled the Sergeant of the reinforcement team, and Grifter had trouble identifying him for awhile, before realising it was his old friend, Veteran Sergeant Honggad! Bolters spitting death at the Orkas, Honggad gave a brief nod to Chaplain Grifter as his team came forth in support, to rain death and destruction on the Orkas. Grifter smiled to himself as friends were indeed a great welcome on the battlefield.

On Sergeant Honggad's flanks came Techmarine Nic, who released sentry guns while he fired his bolter in his left hand, and Sister Liting, expert in the use of agile close combat, having trained together with Sharlynette before, brandished her dual energy blades as she lept and decapitated Orkas who barely registered her presence. Like a shadow darting back and forth, no conventional weapon could even hope to strike her down, her speed knocking Orkas to the ground even as she flinted by. Finally came another huge Space Marine, encased in powerful Terminator bulk armour, with a huge chain bolter protruding from his right arm, firing incendiary rounds into the mass of green Orkas, punching through several of them, cutting them down and sending limbs and torsos scattering in all directions. On his left shoulder, a personalised emblem of an eagle on a pink shield, signifying his favourite colour, Terminator Robin was fearsome indeed. "How about some brute force to back you up eh!" Robin grinned at Yonq Iang. Nic, quickly laid down about 4 sentry guns and 4 battle drones, which formed a perimeter around the Space Marines, giving Grifter and his team some space for a breather.

Encouraged, Grifter, Yonq Iang, Destiny and Sharlynette fought with renewed vigor, after getting fresh ammunition and weapons from the Drop Pods. Grifter spoke into his combead, "We have 3 men down 20 meters to our West, near the broken defense structure! They need assistance!"

"Already on it, sir." A female voice voxed in reply. Sister Valerie and Apothecary GK was tending to Reid and Yuri's injuries and Sister Shona, knocked unconscious by the impact of the Drop Pod, was carried to it by Brother Daryl, who quickly locked her into a safe compartment, and resumed fighting the Orkas. Partly invisible and perched on top of a Drop Pod, Sergeant Arthur took out the biggest Orkas with his long las rifle, each shot piercing through the head of a lumbering Orka leader, or at least what he assumed to be the leaders. He quickly issued orders to the rest of his squad to re-join the battle once Yuri's injuries have been tended to. Reid's injuries didn't seem too severe and Arthur took him into his squad for the time being, and gave him a few more rockets.

And the third Drop Pod contained only 1 thing, but it was enough to cause the Orkas to pause in their assault. Towering more than 4 meters in height, heavily armed with a flame thrower, dual heavy bolters and missile launchers, the venerable dreadnought Luke ploughed through the mass of Orkas like it was taking a walk in a park. Rallen and Yuri, though heavily injured, cheered the dreadnought on and shouted in unison, "Luke Rocks!!"

But even with the arrival of the 6 Space Marines, 2 Sisters of Battle and the incredibly powerful dreadnought, Grifter knew they didn't stand much of a chance against tens of thousands of Orkas, no matter much many were killed, the swarm of Orkas just kept coming.

Happy birthday Boon!

2009-03-02T19:22:00.002+08:00

Thanks to this man, Tan Boon, i've managed to really expand my capacity and realise my talents in music! and not to mention have a heck of a lot of joy and fun in the process, and finding many great friends and awesome musicians!

Celebrated his birthday at the Love the World cafe at the Singapore Flyer last night, i was asked to sing a few songs last min by Ian, and the band was pieced together to play those songs at very last min notice as well. It was really quite sudden, we had super little time to practice, n the whole event was, well, not as organised as expected, but still, most of us there had a lot of fun! and even the drummers and ex-strikeforce pple turned up, like Sebas, Soo huei, Titus, Gabriel, etc! old friends like Darshan even made a guest appearance! hahaha.. noticeably absent was luke, David and Justinn, but aside from those 3, most of the old birds all came! even Samuel n his wife came, n colin brought along his new gf, n we had lots of fun making noise n fellowshipping with the strikeforce pple! haven't talked to so many of them in such a long time, i feel like i'm missing my family members!

Its only a monday n already i'm feeling so lethargic and tired! got work to do but can't really do anything more, have a headache n my eyes are painful from starring at the computer screen, or from the glare of the afternoon sun during the meeting.. sigh. working life is really not easy, almost had to work through lunch today, and clients aren't being very cooperative so its worse..

But i guess i should thank God i still have a job lah. i'll have to force myself to wake up early tomorrow to come to work early, cos i really have no mood to carry on working now liao..

Michelle's birthday party last Sunday, Shuting's birthday party last night, Boon's birthday party this Sunday!!

2009-02-26T14:48:00.002+08:00

So many birthday parties to attend lately, I'm becoming broke just paying for meals and birthday presents. Hahaha.. but its all worth it. Friendship is really valuable and true friendship is really hard to come by these days.. Thank God for good friends and colleagues like Puikwan and Hongyee!

Michelle's birthday (Sun 22 Feb 09)

Met up with Michelle, Joan, Clarence, Sweekeng, Momo, Jeanette, Daryl, Bowen, Mikki and another girl, I can't remember her name, I think is Jazz's girlfriend or something. Think I might have freaked her out by asking a lot of questions about Jazz, but haha, who cares! Oh yeah, and Amelie came later as well, so about 11 pple in total. Met at Bugis and ate at some expensive Japanese place, where the food quality was mediocre, the price was ex and the portions were small! The ice-cream wasn't nice at all, but since they gave mango sauce, it made it edible. If not it just tasted like macdonald's icecream with mango slices! really expensive, that meal, n not worth it at all. Oh, Xiangling came very late too. but as Michelle's best friend, she had to be there lah. Hahaha..

Momo bought the gift which we shared, a black dress which is more like her style than Michelle's style! Haha, but quite nice lah. Mikki made her a card with a really old photo of our old cell group with yujie during halloween, it was damn funny!

Oh yeah, Joan n i took a ride in Clarence's red car to bugis junction, n he's quite a bad driver, changing lanes without signal, and speeding along small roads! but good news is, he quite smoking! (prob for the girl lah.. dawn or something?)

After dinner, we went to TCC (the one nearer the main road) and chill out for an hour or so. the waitress teased clarence (CNN) for being a cheapo, asking for free water n free cake for Michelle! haha.. but then again, the drinks were quite expensive too, about $8 each, so we spend more than $100+ there as a group, plus a few of them ordered cakes. oh, n they took like 80+ over pictures with Mich's ibook camera! so vain n lame lah, but amazingly SK joined the girls in the photo-whoring! hahaha.. she or i mean he, really likes to get attention in photos man! the guys just joked and talked about games, girls, and the usual, and at about 10 pm, I think most of them went home, so left 4 of us guys who went to parklane to play L4D!! To me, that was the highlight of the night, yelling and laughing and panicking and banging the keyboard in frustration and laughter, we played about 2 hours of L4D! by the time we left the LAN shop, it was about 12 plus, and I got home at about 1 plus am.

Was good fellowshipping with the guys n girls! Catching up with things in Michelle's life and the latest gossip and happenings in the cell group! Hahaha..

Shuting's birthday (25 Feb 2009)

Was actually quite surprised that Jasmine asked Joan and I along for Shuting's birthday celebration as we weren't really that close to her. well, i guess Joan is, since she helped out much more with the admin side during drumfest, while i was chilling with the other guys. Haha! but anyway quite a lot of pple came!

Valerie, Jasmine, Yuhong, Ian, Millie, Daryl, Rachel, Yongqiang, Guankeat, Jaslyn, Julia, and maybe one or two more pple that I missed out, I think about 12 of us altogether. They had dinner at Shokudo, but i didn't join them, i prefered to save $ and eat with Puikwan and Hongyee first. They rented 2 rooms at cineleisure to play guitar hero and with 4 seperate computers, where we played L4D all night long! Hahaha.. Was damn fun, screaming and shouting orders and yelling for help and shrieking in fright (yes, Millie and Jaslyn really screamed when playing the game!) and shooting zombies and sometimes killing each other accidentally, was really funny and hilarious! Seeing the expression on Ian's face was priceless man!

Daryl showed up with a big bunch of balloons and we sang Shuting the birthday song. She had about 3 presents from all of us, mostly bags. I dunno why girls always get bags or belts for birthdays! LOL! but the balloons were really nice, n Shuting felt so touched she was stunned for words. Even Irenus rush down from cell group to join the bunch of us.

Though by the time we left it was almost 11.30 am, and I reached home after midnight, I really treausre the time spent with Strikeforce guys, and my old cell group members as well. Guess I really can't click well with my current cell group, even till today I feel like an outsider, to most of them at least. Shrugz..

Thank You Lord for all these friends that You've brought into my life, I feel so blessed to have such great friends! Doesn't matter if they'er younger or older, or in church or not, but they're just wonderful company to be with and enjoy life with!

midnight and still working at office..

2009-02-20T00:01:00.001+08:00

Just a note to self.. when working past midnight, always bring snacks to office to tide me over! so hungry now.. think i'll report in late for work tml, earliest 10 am!

Valentime's Day 2009!

2009-02-16T11:47:00.002+08:00

Just a short post to describe how Joan and I celebrated Valentime's Day.

I know I really didn't spend much time planning for this year's Vday, I initially planned to get up early on Saturday morning, go to the shop which is near Joan's school and get her one of those plastic balloons with a smaller balloon inside it, then go pick up Joan from her house.. unfortunately, I overslept, and woke up at about 11.50 am!

I don't think we stayed up very late on Friday night either, all I remember is meeting Joan after her class and going to eat some very nice Japanese food at the new Jap food court at paradiz centre. A little bit pricey, around $6-8 per meal, but the food was nice, and the decor was good too, and we got a window seat. Hehz. After dinner, we took a short stroll to the museum and had went to Olio Dome for mocha with gelato and an oreo cheesecake for dessert. The drink was nice, but the cheesecake, while looking quite nice, wasn't cheesey enough, and was a bit bland actually, and I was quite disappointed cos it looked really nice on the plate. But by about 10.30 pm they were already cleaning up and chasing out the customers, so I was a little annoyed. We walked to city hall to take MRT home, and I didn't even send Joan home because I was so tired n sleepy.

So anyway, back to Vday. Reached Joan's place just before 12.30 pm cos my dad gave me a lift to the MRT. helped pack the Japanese rice into a tumbler and a small container (haha, don't ask!) and then wanted to go to clark quay Mai mason restaurant for lunch, but in the end settled for Sizzler, becos the stupid restaurant closes at 2.30 pm, and by the time we left Joan's house was already close to 1.20 pm, can't possibly expect us to rush through a nice Vday lunch right? So we had a good meal at TPY's Sizzler, good food and value for money. We had a window seat too, although not much of a view! Haha.. Think I ate too much, had 2 or 3 servings of salad, 2 soups, 2 cheese bread, main course of beef steak with pepper sauce, and fruits.

After that we went to paragon to shop around for ingredients for the Japanese dinner that we were supposed to cook at my place, and ended up at Carefour at plaza sing instead, cos the things were cheaper and easier to find there. I will never go back to the paragon supermarket, one bad experience there is enough. =P

We bought the food (which amounted to $60+ and over spend by about $15, was estimating$50) and actually shouldn't have bought the chocolate ben & jerry ice cream ($14.90!! for such a small container!) but oh well, doesn't matter, how often do I get to splurge on Joan and on such a special day too.

I shan't go into details of my first attempt at cooking with Joan, at least she had a cookbook and some cooking experience to help her, I was struggling with finding simple sauces and cracking an egg. Haha! I admit, I've never cooked a meal in my life, except for instant noodles. We started cooking at around 6 pm, but by the time we were done, it wa already 8 plus in the evening! I never knew cooking could be so tiring! And all I did was prepare the chawamusi egg thingy, and helped cook the Japanese curry, and cut up some carrots and onions, and I was quite exhuasted by the time we finished cooking everything and sat down to eat! The sushi that we made was really funny too, mine was overly cramped with ingredients and was too fat, Joan's sushi still looked quite alright, and my bro n mindice actually took a bite to try it and thought it was ok. Hahaha.. mine was like, experiment gone wrong! but nvm, important thing is that we had fun cooking together, and I must really thank Joan for not getting annoyed with my constant questions on what to do on this and that, cos I really never cooked before! haha.. Took some nice pics, will upload on facebook when I have the time.. After dinner, we had some erm, recreational companionship activities in the living room, before deciding to join my bro n friends. (haha!)

Went down to the BBQ pit to chit chat with Weiliang, Mindice, Huiling and her bf Bao-Er (what a name for a guy, i thought the name was for a girl!) and basically just talked crap and lame jokes until everyone was laughing. The wine probably helped! Then my bro came with more cakes although all of us were simply too stuffed and full to eat anymore, but we still crammed the cakes down, as the cakes were really delicious. Sounds like gluttony, but oh well, once a year only right? How often do we celebrate Vday? Hahaha.. But seriously i've never eaten so much since the CNY cruise!

So that just about wraps up Vday.. sunday was kinda relaxed, didn't do much, wake up for service, Joan came over to watch service with me (parts 2 and 3 of the top 5 things that matter to a man and woman in a relationship), then we had a late breakfast / early lunch and Joan took a short nap before going for MTT and collecting gig pay, while i struggled my way through the afternoon heat to do some work. We had dinner at casuarina, at the botak HK guy's steamboat reastaurant, the promfet cost $47! expensive.. but it was quite big lah, so not bad. we had champagne pork ribs, hot plate beancurd, and charsiew with the 3 layer meat too. I actually enjoyed dinner with my family and Joan, mindice didn't join though.

Just like that, the weekend flew past. Weekdays seem to really crawl by, but the weekend always speeds by so quickly, before you know it, its Monday. Sigh. But i must admit, I did have a really good weekend with Joan from Friday all the way until Sunday night.. although i'm a bit sad that I didn't have time to really plan out the activities, or buy a nice gift for Joan.. thank God she's a really understanding girlfriend, but still i should've done things right, and not let work be an excuse. oh well, i promised her a holiday to Langkawi or somewhere nice for sightseeing after her exams, so i guess i'll plan that trip properly and make sure she has enough shopping money. not like the last time we were at phuket. =P hahaha..

i feel like i'm hitting a dead end..

2009-02-09T02:12:00.002+08:00

its 2.15 am in the morning.. i'm awake and i don't want to sleep, and when i sleep, i don't want to wake up.

its a monday morning n i've got to go to work tomorrow.. either that, or i go to the doctor to get a MC. which is really quite pointless, cos i don't think dr kwok will give me anything which i already don't have... honestly i want to get MC cos i want to stay at home n not go to work because i hate my job.

i've got to admit the fact n start dealing with it, otherwise i simply won't be happy. i suck at my job n i don't like it there. i've got to go job hunt for another job. i simply can't take much more of corporate lifestyle.

sorry God but i think i messed up my life. my girlfriend's upset with me over a few things, i'm feeling really lousy about not being able to meet her needs n being like a slave to my job.. i can't even have a weekend without thinking about work. i'm forced to work extra long hours cos i can't finish my work on weekdays.. i hate this lifestyle, i really hate it..

its like what boon said. i'm doing something purely for the sake of money.

and i''ve got no choice because i'm locked into this property, a house i bought at $630,000. ok, minus off 30k grant, but it still costs $600,000. how the heck am i supposed to find the money to pay finish the house, have a wedding, n a nice honeymoon at the same time? its freaking ridiculous..

i don't know what to do anymore.. i only know how to run away n hide under my blanket, n wish my troubles away, but i know that when i awake, its back into a living hell for me.. the hell of my job, the hell of trying to make ends meet, in paying the house.. i mean, if i want to be debt free in 15 years, i've got to pay off $600000 in 15 years, thats about $40000 a year, which means is about $3k a month which i need to fork out..

that is freaking impossible.. i only earn 3.6 k a month.

on top of that, i've got insurance to pay, the building fund, tithe, offerings, transport, hp bill, and pretty much anything that i need, i've got to use my own cash to pay for it. my parents aren't giving me a single cent anymore..

its so hard to go on.. God i know i can always quit and find another job. but i want to at least finish up this deal with inventa before quitting n perhaps, going for SOT.

maybe start giving tuition part time n teaching again. i don't know.. somehow i pray that You offer me a solution. anything's better than this living hell i'm in..

Royal Carribean Cruise

2009-01-28T17:38:00.002+08:00

Haven't been blogging for the past 2 weeks, because, well, work has been hell, literally. Been going home near 12 midnight almost everyday last week and the week before. I hate work.. but anyway, now i've got some time i might as well blog everything that i need to.

Quick summary of the cruise!

Day 1: Leaving Harbour front!

oh yes, had steam boat dinner with Joan and her family on thursday night before going home, had an enjoyable time with them, just thought i'd drop that note down first. Joan stayed over at my place on thurs night, so no need to fetch her on friday morning.

we rushed out of the house at about 11.30 am, couldn't get a maxi cab so had to go to harbour front in 2 cabs. mindice came from her sch. boarded the ship at about 1 pm and had lunch at the windjammer. good food! i thought. i ain't seen nothing yet! after lunch we went to our cabins, then went to take part in some lucky draw, which we actually won some stuff! after that we explored the ship, and went line dancing and won some more stuff! dinner was fantastic, watched the show at 10.30 pm, some magician named Charles Bach. no bad, he copied a few tricks from David Copperfield and David Blaine, but he stressed that they're only illusions.

Day 2: Port Klang, Sunway Shopping Centre

breakfast was good, at the romeo and juliet restaurant, then we went ashore at Port Klang, malaysia. we were quite excited, never been to that place before. initially i thought there would be nothing to shop and nothing to do, but oh man, Sunway Shopping Centre is even bigger than Vivo city and takashimaya combined! they have an ice-skating rice at the basement as well! its very nice for shopping, Joan n i literally ran from shop to shop picking out clothes, shoes, etc. we didn't spend very much though. Joan bought a cap and 1 top, i bought 3 tops and 1 jeans. i can't help it, i'm a shoppaholic! hahaha.. ate lunch at about 2 pm at the so-called famous bakut teh, which was really cheap and satisfying! loved the taste and the special chinese tea. malaysia really does have better food than singapore! our version of bakut teh has too much pepper, theirs has more herbs and pig organs and stuff. satisfied with lunch, we made our way back to the ship before 4 pm.

rested in the cabin for a while, went to play othello with Joan, and lost to her 2 games! and she couldn't stop bragging about it for the whole trip. -_- haha! dinner was beef steak, prime rib i think. delicious. can't remember if it was the dress up night, but i remember missing the show because i was annoyed with joan over something, and went to buy a book from the shops to read in the cabin instead. but don't worry, we kissed and made up soon.

went to play midnight mini-golf, i think 9 holes. joan got a hole in one, and the bragging starting again. haha. we went to lie down on the deck chairs and listen to music, the wind, the stars and moon, very romantic. haha!

Day 3: Phuket or as the cruise director calls it, "pu chi dao!"

this time didn't have to wake up early, i think we woke up around 9 am, ate breakfast and then went to play bingo. i thought that was ultimately boring n waste of time, so Joan n i went to check out the rockwall, but there was a rock climbing competition there, so we didn't get to try it out. we went exploring, joan got trapped in the kids game room, i set off some alarm cos we used the wrong door, it was really funny! haha.. but anyway we went ashore at about 2 pm. had to sit on this small ferry, 10 min ride to the shore from the cruise ship.

immediately we were bombarded with touters, tut tut drivers, etc! they really know how to "whack" tourists! my mum insisted on looking for the massage at countryside hotel, but nobody seemed to know where on earth it was. we decided to go jet ski first, quite expensive though, $40+ for 50 min of jet ski, but since it was joan's first time, as well as mindice first time playing the jet ski, i think they had loads of fun! Joan was super daring, she actually went to jet-ski around our cruise ship!! our single jet skis of course were much faster than the double that my bro n mindice rode, it was fun, but i almost got thrown in to the sea when i tried a sharp turn! hahaha.. joan went flying across some rocks with the jetski when she went a bit too close to the shore and didn't see the rocks near the bottom of the jetski! thank God she wasn't hurt and the jetski wasn't damaged! we were totally sun burnt when we came back ashore.

had a drink at macdonalds, went searching for the massage parlour again, took a tut tut to the C&N hotel massage, and each person spend 500 baht, which is about $20, on a one-hour massage each. i didn't really enjoy it, felt it was a waste of money n time, i would've much rather gone shopping instead, but since my parents really wanted to have the massage, i sort of went along with it. the person really rubbed my neck n it was quite painful, didn't really like it much. oh well.. we had a dinner that cost us about 4500baht, is around $200! really expensive, i thought it was quite ex, but divided among 6 pple, each person around $33, and we get lobster, prawns, fresh fish, green curry, sotong, mixed vegetables, thai specialties and giant coconut drinks, i think overall not too bad lah. still cheaper than if we were to eat in singapore.

then the shopping-spree began. we had little over an hour to shop, and had to literally run from shop to shop, buying things almost on impulse! joan bought a top and a shorts, i got a bermudas and a pair of shoes, and a t-shirt. my mum bought a bag, my bro n mindice bought clothes. i think only my dad didn't get to buy anything! oh, and i bought 2 DVDs as well. had a bit of hiccup again, but on the ferry back to the boat, joan n i had a nice time sitting right in front of the ferry, watching fireworks, as the locals celebrated chinese new year eve!

went back to the boat for the show, an impressive performance by Crazy horse! the super muscular guy and girl team who did acrobatics, balancing acts, and the guy could even sing very well! amazing act, i would actually pay good money to see such a performance. the show was probably the best of the 3 that i caught. after the show we had a countdown party which lasted all of one hour (or even less!) which involved many balloons dropping down and pple standing around wishing each other happy new year. haha, so what else is new.

we had a bit of supper and then went to the disco to see some crazy chinese pple dancing. wanted to dance, but joan didn't want to, so nevermind. slept at around 3 am.

Day 4: Day at sea

Think this day was a bit boring, but still it was relaxing. Had breakfast at windjammer until about 11 am, then went to catch Charles Bach magic trick in the pool at noon. after that i can't really remember what else we did, except we had a quick nap in the cabin n then joan wanted to swin n go jacuzzi so i accompanied her to the indoor pool, n met my parents there, n tried to play some card game but the rules were too complicated, so they left to go line dancing n i read my book. actually i was pretty much reading my book will joan, my bro n mindice swan in the pool.

there was a final show before the last dinner on the ship, but it kind of sucked. the pianist was alright, interesting pieces, but the 6 china girls playing traditional instruments was quite bad, to the point of being funny. oh well, at least a few of them were good looking. haha! had dinner n thanked Gary, the columbian waiter, for his excellent service during the cruise. after dinner, we went to sing KTV until midnight, n finally collasped on the bed, exhasuted.

Day 5: Reach SIngapore, went visiting, watched Brideswar with Ian, Millie and Shona

Had a really early breakfast, then had to pack up and leave the ship at about 9 am. Really quite sad to leave the ship, had a lot of fun and relaxing time on the cruise. I remember the fries and the pizza at the pizza bar, the super strong wind, lazing around on deck chairs, taking lots of pictures and oh yes, the marvelous works of art during the art auction. it was a cruise which was really very enjoyable, great food, lots of programs. there was even towel folding lesson, and a ice-sculpture demonstration. really 101 things to do on the ship, too bad i didn't bring my trunks, so didn't join joan in the jacuzzi. now thinking about it, i really do regret not jumping in with my shorts! hahaha.. but overall i really enjoyed the trip. i never ate so much in 4 days in my life! hahaha..

Reached home at about 10 in the morning, took an hour nap, and then went visiting to uncle Andrew's house, then to su-po's house, then auntie Jessie's house. then went to joan's house to drop off her bag, then went to visit her grandma. poor thing, she's all alone on chinese new year! i was wondering why didn't the uncle n aunt bring the grandma along when they went visiting? but we had dinner at the 99 cent sushi place w millie n ian, shona didn't eat. the movie asn't as good as i thought, but anne hathaway is pretty sweet n cute, so yeah. haha!

5 days seems to rush past in a flash, n today i'm back in office wondering why didn't i just take today off as well! really no mood to work, was just playing facebook n updating some emails. i really don't think i'll stay in this line of job too long, sitting down n reading documents all day is really boring. haha.

God, thank you for a really good trip, it took my mind off the hell week i just went through before the cruise, but now i really wish you help me get through another 2 days of work.. i've got so much to do, i don't know where to begin, n worst of all, i don't feel like working AT ALL. i almost cried today when joan called my office to chat with me awhile, even though she wasn't feeling well. She's an angel, i love her.

Part 5 - Falling

2009-01-09T19:05:00.000+08:00

"I'm down to my 2nd last clip!" Librarian Yonq fried another 4 Orks with an electric blast, even as he reloaded his bolter. His powers were weakening as they had been fighting intensely for more than an hour, although to the squad, it seemed like eternity.

"Same here, we better fall back to the line!" Grifter sliced 2 Orks diagonally across and emptied his clip into 3 more Orks. He knew they would have to hold the line no matter what the cost. He shouted to his troops "Fall back to the line! Now! Covering fire!!"

Sharlyntte ran backwards and fired her sonic blasters, while Destiny and Reid blasted on full auto, giving some breathing space for the Marines to run back to the defensive line. It was no easy task, hundreds of bodies lay everywhere, and the Marines had to trudge through the blood and flesh to reach the defensive position.

When they reached, they saw Shona tending to the arm of Yuri. The plasma gun had overheated and exploded, his left hand was a bloody mess, but he still fired his bolt gun with his right hand. "Fit a power gauntlet over my arm! I'll fight on even without my hand!" Yuri bellowed, obviously frustrated at the loss of his favourite weapon more than his own hand.

Grifter shouted, "Form the line! When you use up all your ammo, grab your shield and halberds!" He paused to throw a couple of frag grenades, and then voxed, "Where the heck is Rallen? I told everyone to fall back!"

Sharlyntte shouted back, "Rallen's down! I saw him get dragged down into a mob over there!" Her sonic blasters were turning red hot with heat, and she knew they would breakdown any moment.

"What?! Sharlyntte, Yonq, Destiny, to me, now! Form a wedge and cut through to Rallen! We're not leaving anyone behind!!" Grifter yelled in anger. "Use your remaining grenades at the count of 3!"

When the grenades exploded and cleared a small area, the four of them formed a triangle, with Destiny in the middle, firing over the shoulders of Grifter as he grabbed his halberd to form the tip of the group. Yonq and Sharlyntte flanked him, and the four of them cut their way through the lumbering Orks to reach the pile of dead Orks where Sharlyntte thought Rallen was buried under.

But in the meantime, Reid, Shona and an injured Yuri tried their best to hold the Orks from reaching their position, but with each second, the Orks were moving closer, until they were less than a stone's throw away. Suddenly a huge fire ball crashed down right next to Reid and he yelled in pain and surprise, his left leg crushed by the weight, even as the flames singed his armour and his power suit injected painkillers into his body. Barely a moment later, Shona's heavy bolter clicked on empty and she was back using the flame thrower, its fuel supply nearing zero as well. They could not hold the Orks off much longer.

Grifter thought to himself, I hope the infiltrating force has more success than us!

***

"Two more Warbosses down!" Chrawkate's sword sputtered with Ork flesh and he lost his combat knife, stuffing it down the throat of the monster that tried to take a bite out of him. The second Warboss crashed to the ground as VC Ian cut a large "X" shaped wound into its back with his power sword and chain sword.

"And 15 more to go eh! Let's hope the other 3 were killed when the roof collapsed on them!" Jennifurious shouted as she sliced another 2 Orks into 2. "Then that'll actually be just 12 left!"

"Time to bail out and move to the next room!" Millenia was holding off several Orks with her two bolt guns, firing only at heads, maximising the limited bullets she had left. She had dumped her expanded flame thrower in a corner of the room, as hole in it cause the promethium fuel to leak out dangerously.

Suddenly, the 3 Warbosses with the chain mail appeared and roared viciously, looking very very pissed off, with iron rods sticking onto their backs and dust all over them. They actually survived the collapse of the roof and were here presumably to exact revenage for their fallen buddy.

"Fall back! We can't take on those 3 like this!" VC Ian threw a flash grenade which stunned a few Orks momentarily, giving them a road of escape. They fired and backed away toward the corridor.

Suddenly Millenia stopped and reloaded her bolt guns, kneeled down and aimed. VC Ian grabbed her arm and said "There's no time! Those peashooters don't work against those mon"…

KABOOM!! The room exploded in a blaze of white and yellow heat, the fire spilling out into the corridor and incinerating the 3 Warbosses along with dozens of other Orks. Millenia had shot the fuel tanks of her spent flame thrower to cause the explosion, taking out the 3 Warbosses at once!

She grinned at Ian who could not believe his eyes. His skills, his rage, his experience.. all bested by a young Sister who had thought to use her brain to set a trap. "That one's for Charles." She managed to whisper. "We've still got 12 more to kill. Let's go!"

But as the four of them regrouped and leapt down the stairs to the second floor of the hideous building, a sudden deafeningly loud explosion rocked the entire building, causing Jennifurious to actually lose her footing and trip slightly. Pieces of the wall were destroyed and several Orks lay dead along the corridor. VC Ian wondered what had happened, when gun fire from outside the building drew his attention.

Rohan and Neophiri were atop a Leman Russ tank, and they had blown a hole in the wall. Orks were surrounding the vehicle even as the machine guns and mounted heavy bolters spat death all around the tank.

"Come on! We need you guys to help!" Millenia yelled, as she noticed they were soon about to be overrun.

Neophiri jumped onto the ledge and Chrawkate caught his arm and pulled him to safety, and Rohan prepared to jump, but first, threw a grenade into the hull of the tank - which was filled with explosives. "Guys, run for cover!!" he yelled and laughed insanely as he joined the group. They ran down the hallway for 4 seconds before another tremendous explosion rocked the building, as the tank was blown apart in a huge fire ball, killing scores of Orks which were surrounding it.

"Oww.. my ear drums are still ringing!" Complained Chrawkate as he picked himself off the floor, as the group shook hands with the newly arrived Marines, more than glad to see them add firepower to their squad.

"Eh guys.. you might want to take a look at that.." Rohan pointed toward the big hole in the wall where the tank had blasted. 10,000 angry Orks had heard the blast and has come running to the scene of battle. Ten huge and ugly Warbosses, some of them carrying rocket launchers and meat cleavers, were at the fore front of the mob.

"Well," VC Ian said to this squad. "Looks like we don't have to hunt for our targets any longer.. Since we're about to become the hunted." There was no way they were getting out of this mess alive. They needed a miracle to get through this.

***

"Rallen! Rallen!! Get up man!!" Librarian Yonq grabbed Rallen and hauled him up from under the pile of dead Orks. His chest armour was broken and his left arm was cracked at a very painful angle, but thank the Emperor, he was still alive and breathing. At least he would still be able to walk back to the defensive line.. If it was still there.

"Its.. no use.. leave me.. leave me!" Rallen gasped and coughed out blood. His visor was removed and he had the look of defeat on him. "My legs.. I can't feel my legs!"

Chaplain Grifter slapped his face. "You are not dying on me now Marine! You get back up on your ass and finish this! You are part of the Strikeforce!!"

Suddenly they heard a scream and a shout of despair, and they turned to see the 3 warriors being overwhelmed by a tide of green monsters. Only Reid was still standing, his left arm punching away at Orks furiously, while his right hand held onto Shona, who was firing weakly into the horde. The desperate look in his eyes was as piercing as the look of fear on Shona's face. Yuri could not be seen, probably on the ground being trampled upon. Grifter felt numb in his heart.. He had led his squad not only to their death, but also to their defeat.

Part 4 - Cracks in the plan

2009-01-09T17:23:00.000+08:00

While the main assault begun in the distance, VC Ian and his small squad prepared their jump-packs to make the jump straight into enemy territory.

Sergeant Chrawkate was spinning his combat blade and chainsword, eager to slay some enemy Orkas. He had fought several Wicked Orkas before and knew their strengths and weaknesses, and thus his input was extremely valuable to the squad. Charles prepared his smoke grenades and adjusted his stealth powersuit so he became almost invisible. Jenniferious was there to ensure that VC Ian did not go out of line in his rage and hate toward the Orks, and her wisdom and experience in battling Orks too helped understand the enemy. Not to mention her large curved katana was handcrafted centuries ago, which had tasted the blood of many Orks, had a special feature - it glowed bright blue if there were Orks within 10 meters of the sword weilder. There would be no surprise attacks on this dame. Millenia just looked down at the Ork stronghold and focused on their jump.

VC Ian had a chainsword in his left hand and a power sword crackling with electricity in his right, a gift from an old Inquisitor. He looked at his squad, seeing they were ready, and gave the hand signal for the jump.

The 5 of them leapt into the air, assisted by the jump packs, and landed right on the roof of the headquarters of the Ork stronghold. Or at least what resembled a headquarters. It was crudely nailed together wooden walls, with red and white paint splashed over it and forming the word "Wagh!!" No Ork noticed them, as they were either rushing to the battle at the main gates where Alpha squad had engaged the sentries, or running around trying to find out the source of the noise. The green creatures were really quite dim-witted, several fights were already breaking out as big Orks collided into each other in their frenzy to reach the main battle.

Flightphesy squad paid them no heed as they silently entered the main building, wondering how on earth the Orks managed to build a stronghold with wooden boards and metal rods, and where they would find the 20 or so Ork leaders. They didn't have to walk very far.

The first room they came to already contained 3 of the brutes, snoring loudly and fast asleep. "This is a walk in a park!" whispered Charles as the squad moved in around them, and prepared to make the kill. Simultaneously, 2 of the warriors plunged their blades into 2 Warbosses, while VC Ian took off the head of the meanest looking one with a swipe of his power sword. It head rolled off and green ichor spilled all over the floor. The other 2 however, didn't die so easily. One actually managed to lift its shoota halfway and fired a shot, before Chrawkate twisted the blade in its heart to kill it, and another let out a loud roar of defiance and brought its left fist on the head of Charles. He moved aside to dodge the blow a little too late and got hit on his arm, but Jenniferious decapitated the monster. But the damage had been done. The noise alerted the other monsters to the room!

"Rwwarrr!!" With ferocious growls, a horde of about 20 greenskins stomped into the room, probably the personal guards of the 3 Warbosses they had just killed. Although slightly smaller than the 3 monsters they had killed, these Wicked Orka Orks were still towering beasts of over 2 meters, with huge cleavers and spiked clubs as weapons.

Millenia sent a wash of promethium flame over the horde, softening them up before the other 4 opened up with small arms. 7 Orks fell dead, another 3 collasped and rolled on the ground, roaring in pain at the fire. The rest clambered over the fallen dead, only to be gunned down by 3 warriors while Millenia continued to flame the disgusting Orks. Sergeant Chrawkate preferred to engage in hand to hand combat, his knife and sword slashing and slaying Orks left and right, moving with grace and such speed that he was only a blur of dark grey. Within a few minutes, 20 dead Orks and 3 dead Warbosses littered the ground. But more were stomping their way up the stairs, and Charles had to smoke them in order for the squad to move to their next targets.

"Not bad, 3 down, 17 to go!" VC Ian complemented his team as the ran down the hall, through the smoke screen, their visors providing them with detailed layout of the stronghold.

***

When the first explosion went off, Sergeant Neophiri and Rohan were still laying mines at the sides of the Ork stronghold, walking through swampy land and placing explosives at critical parts of the fort.

"Damn, that’s a bit too early! Come on, let's get to the vehicles or Alpha will be rocket barraged to death!" Neophiri and Rohan threw down their remaining mines and ran toward the side gate. The 4 Orks guarding the gate didn't even know what hit them, and the 2 Space Marines broke the lock (which was no easy feat, considering the lock was a thick pad lock the size of a tree trunk!) and went to destroy the Ork Vehicles.

Only, they didn't expect to find a squad of Ork Bikers getting ready to move into battle. Thankfully, they were clambering onto the bikes and whooping in delight, that they didn't notice the 2 Space Marines who had sneaked in through the back door of the makeshift garage (a large rectangular room, made of tin walls and a partly covered zinc roof, all rusty and bent out of shape.

Before Neophiri could react, Rohan had jumped into the gunner's seat of the nearest Ork vehicle and opened fire with the 2 canons, blasting the group of Bikers to bits and pieces, and creating a heck of a noise! Rohan was grinning from ear to ear after he finished blasting the last Ork, and the bikes exploded with a small "BOOM"!

Neophiri shouted at him, "This is supposed to be a covert operation! You just signed out death warrants!!"

Sure enough, the loud explosions alerted another large group of Orks who were roaring and groaning with pleasure at the prospect of another battle. Rohan simply shrugged and turned his big guns toward the angry mob, while Neophiri was about his task placing the C4 charges onto the vehicles. And man, there were at least a thousand vehicles in that storage place, there was no way the 2 of them could destroy that many! He had to think of plan desperately, while Rohan fired away at the raging Orks approaching the garage, but for every Ork that fell, 3 more seemed to stomp over the dead body and charged relentlessly toward him!

***

Outside the stronghold, already a thousand Orks had closed in on the 8 warriors, while another few thousand were impatiently pushing their way through the mob, war cries and sluggers being fired into the air angrily, as the Orks began to overwhelm the small band of warriors.

Each blast of his plasma gun literally cut Orks into pieces, slicing torsos and limbs. Yuri was laughing and enjoying the carnage, even has bullets bounced off his armour, threatening to break it open. But he know the ceramic armour of his power-suit could withstand much more punishment, so he ignored the small pitter patter of bullets and slayed more Orks.

Rallen was whooping with savage joy, having abandoned his heavy bolter for the fun of close combat, wielding a lightning claw on his left hand and a chainsword in his right, he danced a bloody spectacle in the mass of swirling Orks, his sword taking off heads and his lightning claw spilling cuts with each swipe, his massive foot kicking and cracking skulls. This was what he was, entirely in his element of energy and savage killing! He seemed an unstoppable one-man demolition machine, carving holes in the advancing Ork army, having slain perhaps a hundred Orks already.

Sharlyntte too had kept her sonic blasters and jumped into the fray at Rallen's side, wielding 2 wickedly curved blades, signature weapons of the Sisters of Battle. While Rallen's dance of death was forceful and erratic, hers was a dance of fluid grace and speed, almost like the Harlequins of the Eldar, her blades sharp enough even to cut atoms into pieces. She leapt and twirled around, all the while shrieking and yelling her native battle cries, fearless and relentless. It was almost ballet as a form of slaughter.

Reid was being more level-headed, using his cybernetic left arm to fire salvos of rockets at the biggest targets, while operating Rallen's heavy bolter with his right hand, stopping every few minutes to reload his rocket launcher. Each explosion of a rocket created a fireball as big as a house, incinerating at least 20 Orks with each blast.

Chaplain Grifter and Librarian Yonq Ilang was fighting back to back, cutting down enemies all around them as the Orks thought surrounding these foes would give them the advantage in numbers. Not so, as they found out the hard way. Swinging his sword skilfully in large arcs, Grifter sliced Orks and continued firing his bolters, each shot splitting a brain open or puncturing a hole in a heart. Librarian Yonq was another feat altogether, his entire body glowing and crackling with power, as he used his staff to knock his opponents off their feet and then fry them with a blast of electric power, or using his mind to tear apart the brains of the Orks with a psychic storm, and his left hand still spitting out death from his bolter.

Destiny, the psyker was not as well trained or as powerful as Yonq, but she too could release a blast of chain lightning, killing dozens of Orks with one blast, while she aimed her heavy bolter and continued shooting down Orks at the fringe of the firing line, being careful not to hit the dancing Rallen and Sharlyntte. She didn't fire at full auto so as not to lose control of the weapon, and conserved ammunition for the numerous foes. Her heavy bolter and Reid's heavy bolter created a criss-cross pattern of gun fire which the Orks struggled to break through, only to be cut down by Grifter and Yonq.

Shona was right beside her, burning Orks with the cleansing promethium flame at short range, making sure the Orks did not penetrate the firing line. It was her first time fighting the beastly Orks, and although she had dealt with Chaos hell spawn, mutilated cultists, Dark Eldar and uncountable Tyranide, she began to think the Orks were by far the more savage and brutish of them all. They didn't burn as easily, they never retreated and they still pressed on through the flame as it burned their faces off their skulls. She shuddered and wondered if they could hold them off much longer.

They had been fighting for little more than 30 minutes and already hundreds of Orks lay dead on the ground, and dozens more lay squealing as they awaited their death, arms and legs broken or guts spilling out of gaping wounds. Yet, they knew this was just the beginning. Beyond the gates, there were thousands more Orks, bigger, stronger and tougher than the ones they had killed. They could see the Kamikaze Rocket Boyz, the Shoota Boys coming from the back of the swarm. Large fire balls lauched from the Orks crude steam artillery rained down around them, although none actually came close to hitting the warriors, and often crushed and burned other Orks instead.

At first to keep his spirits up, Chaplain Grifter began to sing and praise the Emperor. His vox communicator was still on, and soon, every member of Alpha squad was joining his song in the chorus, a joyous song of slaughter of the ghastly monsters, the damned enemies of the Emperor. They are the Space Marines, and they shall know no fear. They cheered and sang as they killed and killed, but with every green monster slain, more seemed to charge at them. Would they be able to hold out long enough for Flightphesy squad to accomplish their mission?

***

"Take that you piece of green filth!" VC Ian stabbed an Ork through the face and his power sword impaled the monster and sunk into the brain of another Ork behind it.

Here the fighting was intense and fierce. In close quarters, guns were of little use, and every warrior had a blade drawn and cut a bloody path through their attackers, going from room to room, hunting for the remaining Warbosses. They soon found what they were looking for, when they burst into a large room, this one filled with the stink of meat, wine and really bad breath.

Four huge war bosses stood in the centre, clad in chain mail and holding ridiculously huge weapons. Two of them had huge broard axes, one had a jagged sword and the other had a spiked mace.

"Marines!! Focus fire on 3!!" VC Ian yelled over the din of battle. "The one in the centre!!"

With a last thrust or a kick, the 5 knocked away the smaller Orks who seemed puny compared to the huge towering Warbosses, and whipped out their ranged weapons and concentrated fire on the largest Ork in the room for 5 seconds. The coughing of bolt rounds, the fwoosh of the flame thrower, the hiss of the plasma gun, all aimed at the biggest meanest Ork they have ever seen. It was so big, they didn't even need to aim. Green flesh exploded in all directions and the monster seemed to halt in its tracks, but to their horror, the monster roared in defiance when they ceased fire, and seemed to move forward..

And then it tripped on another dead Ork and collapsed to the ground, dead.

But the victory was short-lived, as one Warboss slammed a fist into Millenia, sending her flying to the side of the room, falling and landing on 3 Orks, killing them instantly, while another Warboss swung his mace at Charles, connecting with a shoulder pad and cracking it severely. The smaller Orks, on seeing that the Space Marines could falter, pounced on them with renewed vigour.

Jenniferious had to act fast or risk the whole squad being swarmed and trampled to death. She activiated her jump-pack and crashed through the roof, shouting at the rest to follow her lead. While the rest struggled to activate their jump-packs, she lay down covering fire and blasted many Orks to kingdom come, but she realised she was running low on ammo magazines. "Hurry guys!"

VC Ian, Millenia, a bit stunned but generally unhurt, and Chrawkate flew through the roof.. but where was Charles? The roof was collapsing onto of the Orks, slabs of concrete crushing several Orks.

Charles could not be seen as the Orks swarmed across the room kicking up a cloud of dust and began hurling axes and debris at the 4 of them.

"Dammit! Let's move to the other side of the roof!" VC Ian directed his jet pack and the others followed suit, and they flew to the other end of the roof about 30 meters away and dropped down on a few unsuspecting Orks, crushing them with their boots. VC Ian smashed his fist into the face of another Ork in anger, his eyes blood shot with rage, and swore, "We'll make sure Charles didn't go down in vain!"

Part 3 - The Assault

2009-01-09T12:24:00.000+08:00

Formal introductions and the briefing for the mission were over quickly. Each warrior knew that the fate of the planet hung in the success of their mission, and they knew they would rather perish in battle than let the Lord Emperor down. Soon, all 15 of them were aboard the Thunderhawk, racing toward the heart of the enemy, in the dead of the night.

Sister Millenia was checking her gear and her flame thrower when she noticed VC Ian pacing the ship quietly, as if in deep thought. "What bothers you so, brother?" She asked, when he walked pass her. "Does the squad leader have a plan to strike the enemy yet?"

VC Ian looked up in surprise, a little annoyed to be interrupted from his thoughts, but formed a smile when he saw Sister Millenia's earnest face. "Yes of course we do. We have to form 2 squads, one to create a diversion, one to infiltrate the Orkas stronghold, and maybe two warriors to be on standby to secure the LZ (Landing Zone)."

Sister Millenia simply asked, "Permission to make a request, Vice-Captain?"

VC Ian raised an eye brow. He was not used to requests coming from his men. "Speak freely, sister. What is your request?"

"May I request to follow you into battle? I've heard many stories of your bravery and leadership, and would like to have the honour of experiencing it in battle today." She almost turned red from embarrassment at that statement.

VC Ian was a little taken aback as well. Not that he didn't know about the stories or rumours about his exploits, but that even a revered sister could stand in awe of him, he was truly humbled and replied, "Of course, I look forward to working with you as well.. Millenia." He smiled and walked away.

***

In the dense jungles of the planet Batukara, the Wicked Orka Clan had secured their stronghold. Being crude, low-intelligence creatures, they simply mimicked whatever building or castle they have seen before, throwing together pieces of metal and wood in a haphazard way, to build a large and ugly fort which held some 200,000 Orks, growling and shrieking at each other, along with their primitive weaponary of axes, shootas, rocketss and vehicles of war. Out of the large mass of Orks, a group of about 20 Orks stood out, being almost double in size and grossly muscled, with teeth as long as a human's index finger and claws as big as an elephants tusks. These were the leaders of the Wicked Orkas, the targets of the Strikeforce Space Marines. Defeat these, and the remaining Orks, without leaders, will simply turn on each other in a thirst for endless war.

A small squad of 15 against 20 massive and cruel giant Ork leaders, and with 200,000 Orks at their command. The odds were stacked heavily against our heroes, and they probably needed a miracle to get their job done.

***

The drop pods landed more than 10 km from the stronghold, and the Space Marines and Battle Sisters began their daring assault.

It was a simple plan. Sergeant Neo and Brother Rohan would form a 2-man team and go on a "Cross Roads" saboteur mission and join up with the main force later. 5 Marines and 3 Sisters lead by Chaplain Grifter would be the distraction assault "Alpha", while the remaining 3 Marines and 2 Sisters lead by Vice-Captain Ian would be the War-boss killing squad "Flightphesy", moving under cover and stealth into the rooms of the 20 Warboss Orks. A simple plan with textbook strategy. However, none of them expected the disastrous results of their plan, and the unnerving cunning of the Wicked Orkas. They would be even more shocked at the appearance of an unexpected force.

***

Squad Alpha were moving slowly, as they had to allow squad Flightphesy to move quickly to higher ground and jet pack silently into the compound of the Orka stronghold. They would give Flightphesy about 3 hours lead time, before making the distraction to draw the majority of the Orks out for battle. Or at least that was how the plan should have been.

"My brothers and sisters, as we prepare for battle today, remember that we only go into battle to preserve the authority of the Emperor, for the glory of the Imperium of Man, and for the safety and prosperity of the generations to come. We are not here to rain mindless slaughter on the enemy for selfish reasons of territory or revenge, or worse still, unreasonable animalistic lust for war. Yet, when we strike, we will be swift and without mercy, we will give no quarter for we shall receive none. We will cut them down and let the fury of the God-Emperor burn them to the ground. And we shall give thanks for the honour of this task, this suicide mission. But do not think we go to our deaths, but to our destiny!" Chaplain Grifter gave his rousing speech, after reading the Litanies of Battle and positioning his warriors. Though he spoke with an edge of victory in his voice, he knew, and his warriors knew, that this day might be the last day for some, or even all of them.

A handful of Space Marines and Battle Sisters, no matter how formidable or skilful or powerful, were no match for the hundreds of thousands of Orks which were gathering on the planet. They had no armoured vehicles, no air support, no escape plan. They were here to sacrifice their lives for the sake of the greater mission, to ensure that squad Flightphesy carries out their mission as quickly as possible.

They formed the firing line at the edge of the clearing. Brother Yuri with his meltagun, Reid with his rocket launcher, Rallen with his heavy bolter, Sharlyntte with her twin sonic blasters, Shona with her standard flame thrower and Destiny with a mounted heavy bolter. Librarian Yonq Ilang and Chaplain Grifter stood in the center of the firing line, Yonq with his staff alight with sizzling blue energy and a standard bolter, Grifter with two bolters drawn, his chainsword is his waist, ready to be drawn.

Grifter glanced to his right and saw that Destiny, like all the other members of Alpha squad, were looking at him for the signal to begin the carnage, but her large eyes seemed to say something more. After all, they had been more than friends, even if that was a long time ago. He made a mental note to look out for her, and promised himself that when they get off this planet, or rather if they get off this damned planet, he would leave the Space Marines Chapter and find Destiny to pick up where they left off.

"Let's show them what the Strikeforce is made of! Weapons ready?" Grifter shouted.

"Locked and loaded!" "Give me a target sir!" "Ready to commence execution of targets!" "Affirmative!" "Ready when you are, Grifter!" "Aaahhh-wweeeee-wwwoooahh!" A shrill war cry from the lips of Battle Sister Sharlyntte somehow pumped up their adrenaline another notch and pushed their faith up, and their muscles tensed, their fingers itchy to pull the trigger on their weapons.

"I've got your flank, Grifter." Yonq Ilang smiled.

"Well there's no better way to go than this eh, old friend?" Grifter raised his bolters, took aim at the sentries and got ready to move forward. "Going down in a blaze of glory!"

"We're not going down, my dear Chaplain. Remember, the Emperor protects." Yonq Ilang grinned, knowing that over-used line somehow didn't feel so right anymore.

"Yeah, just make sure you fry em if they get too close to me." Grifter chuckled, and then shouting into his vox. "For the Strikeforce, and for the Emperor!!"

8 warriors opened fire on the surprised Orks and the day of killing began, in a spectacular explosion of fire, a blaze of plasma and coughing of bullets. The assault had begun.

Strikeforce Space Marines - Part 2

2009-01-08T10:10:00.000+08:00

Vice-Captain Ian paced back and forth along the corridor impatiently, awaiting the decision of Captain-Commander Boon for the remaining 8 Marines to accompany him and Chaplain Grifter on the infiltration mission. He was already slightly annoyed at the Inquisitor's surprise guests, the 5 Sisters of Battle, but his penchant for battle was irked even more by the arrogance of the Inquisitor. He decided to save his energy and unleash it on the Orkas instead, and decided to settle down to wait.

Meanwhile Chaplain Grifter was thinking about one particular person - Sister Destiny. Years before he joined the Space Marines, he had met the girl who captured his heart, but because of his duty to the Emperor, he had been forced to repress those feelings, and the gene-seed of the Space Marines were supposed to suppress useless emotions such as affection and hormonal activity. He had chosen this path of the warrior, the powerful Adeptus Astartes, and had abandoned her on his home planet N280 many years ago. Yet, once again, they would meet and this time he wondered how the situation would turn out.

Captain-Commander Boon decided on the 8 Marines and issued his directions through the servitors and data slates. On the final list for the team, aside from VC Ian and Chaplain Grifter:

1st Sergeant Neophiri, a veteran of the Strikeforce Space Marines, an experienced and well-liked warrior who had risen the ranks in the previous years.

Librarian Yonq Ilang, a sanctioned psyker and a keen mathematician and battle tactician.

2ns Sergeant Chrawkate, a relatively newly promoted sergeant, known for his extremely efficient skills in battle, and his amazing speed and stamina in taking down enemies.

Brother Yuri, a large, muscled veteran marine who uses heavy weapons like the plasma gun and heavy bolter, and who also doubles up as engineer and technician for the squad.

Brother Rallen Joshua, a courageous, energetic veteran, who never failed to inspire his fellow Space Marines with shouts of victory and vigour, charging headon in to the enemy.

Brother Charles, an almost retired veteran, but useful in this mission of infiltration and stealth. His smoking skills would be an invaluable assets for this particular mission.

Brother Reid, expert in close combat and small arms. His left arm was fitted with bionics due to a previous battle wound which severly injured his shoulder, but how it was stronger than ever, with strength 3 times that of a normal human.

Last, but not the least, newly inducted Brother Rohan, a skillful warrior who quickly learnt the art of war and surpassed many of his teachers, on par even with sergeants and perhaps even the Vice-Commander.

This squad of 8 of the best which the Chapter had to offer, plus the strength and spiritual anionting of the 5 Sisters of Battle, would be the ultimate dream team.

New Strikeforce Space Marines story

2009-01-06T18:12:00.001+08:00

Time for a little creativity! Have not been writing stories for sometime now, and since its already 5.30 pm, I've no mood to work any further, and i'm totally annoyed with the stupid internet connection which keeps disconnecting every half an hour or so, thought i'd write a short story to end the day.

***

What if the Strikeforce was a special section of the Space Marines?

***

Captain-Commander Boon deliberated on his decision for hours ever since obtaining the data slate from the Adeptus Mechanicus from the planet Mars.

He knew he had a powerful solid team of Marines. He knew they had access to the most advance weaponary that the Imperium had to offer, and even Xenos weapons which the Ordo Xenos Grey Knights had thought fit to confer upon the Strike Force Space Marine Chapter. But brute strength and courage would not win the day for this coming war. He knew because the Strike Force had encountered such enemy before, the green-skin filth, the brutish, hulking, noisy, warmongering alien species known as the Orks, and none so noisy, barbaric and bloodthirsty as the Wicked Orka Clan.

He called for his Vice Captain Ian Esienhower, and Chaplain Grifter as well.

"My brothers, how should we defeat this emeny? They are numbers without limits, massive but stupid. Yet, our numbers have dwindled in recent years, while their numbers only grow in disgusting proportions. Your Captain humbly seeks your advice." Captain-Commander Boon spoke, his voice deep and serious.

Vice Captain Ian growled, "I say we let them face the Chapter whole! Let's overwhelm them with our might and courage! Though they may be large in number, we Space Marines of the divine Emperor shall purge the land of such blasphemous filth!" He was known for his strength and courgae, always taking the most direct approach, with little patience for incompetency. Vice Captain Ian had earned a vicious and respected reputation as the youngest Space Marine to ever hold the title of Vice Captain, given his zealous support of the Captain-Commander and his service to the Emperor of Man.

"Hmm.. but what about the new recruits? Those who have yet to have a taste of real battle? Those freshly graduated Marines who only have practice at the target ranges, or taking out weak enemies not fit for me to use a lightning claw to decapitate? And how about those who have become silver with years of experience, but have not seen battle for a long time? Would you have them join the battle of the Wicked Orkas without fielding them for more than a decade, without updating them on the new weapons and tactics of the Strike Force?" Captain-Commander Boon fired a barrage of questions at his Vice-Captain, who could not find the words to reply for a moment, his finger grasping and relaxing at the chain sword at his hip as he struggled to find the answers.

Chaplain Grifter spoke out softly but firmly. "We only need to send in a team. A simple surgical strike at the heart of the enemy, remove their leaders and without the leaders, the Wicked Orkas will simply degenerate into factions and infighting. They will do our work for us and slaughter each other, and while they are weakening each other, only do we return with the full Chapter to rain death and destruction to the enemies of the Emperor, with the help of the Ordo Malleus, Ordo Xenos, Adeptus Mechanicus and the blessed Titan Warmachine - David the Goliathe!"

The mere mention of the ancient but powerful and revered Battle Titan - David the Goliathe, seemed to put a smile on the usually strict and stern face of the Captain-Commander.

"A good plan.. Leave me now, both of you, and prepare for battle. I shall choose the other 8 Marines to accompany you for the strike at the Wicked Orkas.. Hold on. I've just received a scroll of urgency from the Inquisition!"

A hologram image of a robed figure appeared near the Space Marines. It was the mysterious but authoritative agent of the Inquitision, the Inquisitor Dyen. As much as he disliked the Strikeforce Space Marines, he had to admit that they were a force to be reckoned with, and a deadly weapon which can be unleashed upon the foes of the Emperor.

"Greetings Captain-Commander, I have official business, and though on very short notice, would require your utmost co-operation. The infestation of the Wicked Orkas have come to the attention of the Sisters of Battle, and a squad of Sisters would be accompanying your Marines into battle. Rest assured, they are recommended by the highest order of the Sisterhood, and are more than capable of holding their own in any battle they may find themselves in. As these are instructions under the order of the Inquisition, there shall be no objections."

Captain-Commander Boon, Vice-Captain Ian and Chaplain Grifter simply nodded, though Ian's gritting of teeth was obvious and loud enough to be heard by all present in the chamber.

Inquisitor Dyen continued. "There shall be a total of 5 Sisters who will be arriving on your Battle Barge shortly. Elder Sister Jenniferious, the most senior of the Sisters. Sister Shona, the apothecary. Sister Sharlyntte, the audio-weapons specialist. Sister Destiny, the psyker. Finally, Sister Millenia, close combat specialist. Please ensure that they are well prepared and briefed for the battle ahead. For the Emperor!"

"For the Emperor!" chorused the 3 Space Marines, before the hologram flickered and disappeared.

2009-01-05T14:49:00.001+08:00

Wow, before I knew it, 2008 has come and gone, I completed my PLC, I started working for real, went through several hard times at work and in my relationships, went for several memorable Strikeforce performances, organised several fun gatherings with JC, primary sch friends, and put on quite a bit of weight around the tummy!

Oh man, my waist is 32 inches now, from just 30 inches at the beginning of 2008! I'm really getting too fat, and its only around my tummy area, which looks quite gross to me, time to really EXERCISE in 2009, at least 3 times a week!

Alright, time to really think through and set my goals for 2009.

Here's the final list, which includes the goals set out earlier in a previous post:
1. start coming to office on time (i.e. reach before 9 am) (so can leave office by 6.30 pm if there's nothing urgent! hahaha.. seriously, i wanna go home before the moon comes up.)
2. start sleeping earlier (12.30 am latest) and wake up at 7.30 am sharp each morning (7 hours of sleep should be sufficient)
3. lose the excess fat - start exercising, jog twice a week (2.4 km at least), 30 sit ups twice a week, 30 push ups twice a week, only have supper once every 2 weeks
4. start reading the Bible everyday, praying for at least 15 min after reading the Bible, before sleeping.
5. learn to understand Joan better, try to provide for her not just financially, but in terms of emotional support - encouragement esp during exam periods, plan a private getaway holiday over a weekend for just the both of us (maybe in June after her exams)
6. spend less money on cabs (max take cab twice a week) - limit myself to $100 of cab fare a month
7. complete building fund of $5000 -> $833 each month (i'm already late one month, did not give BF for november), if not feasible, pray n ask CGL about the amount
8. resume Bible study classes every wednesday night
9. start to treat my family more often to meals ( at least once every 2 months)
10. spend more time with the cell group, fellowship more with them
11. start planning my career path - write resume, send out by end of Jan, go for interviews in Feb or March, change firm by June 2009 latest (if God willing of course.. still need to pray about this a lot)
12. cancel credit card, not necessary
13. Save up at least $300 a month for myself starting Feb onwards, so i have at least $3300 in my personal savings account by end of 2009 (yes thats a really miserable amoount for a lawyer, but what to do, got building fund n all sorts of other commitments. haiz.)
14. practice my keyboard and drumming skills at least 1 hour each every week
15. Plan for wedding in early 2011 (subject to other factors)
16. record all my expenses in a book and in the excel sheet for financial planning
17. Bring 1 new friend to Christ in 2009, bring at least 6 new friends to church in 2009
18. Be more open to discipleship and fellowship with more mature Christians and working adults - find a mentor or a close friend i can be accountable to
19. go for one mission trip in 2009 (always wanted to go for one, having no time or no money is not really a valid excuse anymore!)
20. limit myself to 2 movies a month (not more than 20 movies a year)
21. step up more in Strikeforce to play for lead, work together with Boon for the SF Musical
22. learn to say "NO" to unnecessary spending - e.g. weddings of friends i don't really know, impulse buying, midnight cab fares, etc
23. come out with a 5 year plan from 2010-1015
24. go for couples ministry events, help pastor if he needs help for the new ministry
25. meet up with law friends and JC friends at least once every 2-3 months, meet up primary sch friends 2-3 times this year, meet up with old ex-CG members at least twice (pple like Rosa, weixiang, shuyi, yongqiang, yujie)

will update the list when i think of more realistic goals for the year! will also keep a checklist so that i'm able to see if i achieve at least 70% of all my goals! i think 70% should be quite acceptable already, cos very few pple can really fulfil ALL of their goals and new year resolutions!

there's also 3 resolutions that Joan picked for me:

1. be more proactive n perform better at my job
2. rise up in Strikeforce
3. don't spend so much, save up more

I think I already covered these 3 in my personal goals, so don't really have to put it in the list.

***

Now, for a quick recap of events..

31 December - 1 Jan 2009: The last gig of 08 and first gig of 09 at Sheraton Hotel!

Took urgent leave on 31 Dec, mainly because i couldn't drag myself up from bed after the late rehearsal at marina bay w the SF pple, n woke up at about 11 am. i can't really remember what happened after that, except we had to be at Sheraton hotel by 1 pm, and the practices lasted until about 4 pm, and then we went to Waffle Town for a late lunch. then we went to cold storage to buy a pack of playing cards, and then Joan n i went to meet Chinhua to get the costume (because Ian forgot to bring his costume for neo!) and by the time we got back to the hotel, we still had time to join the others n play cards for about an hour. Haha! Bridge is quite fun, if you're winning. hehz.

The gig was good, we had a lot of fun, the Russians were really sporting n fun loving pple, they clapped n cheered n joined in the fun! they needed no prompting, when we were playing 4 minutes and Dhoom again, about 30+ pple came down to the dance hall and just enjoyed themselves! energy level was up and UP, we played quite well (i mean we're playing to a track with IEM, what can we play wrongly right? hahaha!) after the FHW (david as usual, we super energetic, making all of us look like snails, n his buff build made Nic look like stick man, playing next to him!), we went to eat the buffet at the event, n it was awesome! delicious lamb, beef steak, prawns, pasta, lobster soup, etc.. we really ate until we were so full!

Went to storehub to packup, then to marina to pick up the SF pple who played at the mediacorp countdown show, then back to storehub to pack up, and then we drove to the hongkong cafe at east coast area but last order was at 2 am, and we had just missed it by a few minutes! so we went to another cafe called c9 or something also in the east area, n the last order was at 3 am, so we managed to order a bit of food and had a nice time of fellowship, although most of us were super tired by then! millie slept in boon's van even though there were like 7 of us squeezed in the back! Joan, millie, valerie, nic, guankeat, yongqiang and myself. there was barely even room left to sneeze. hahaha! Ian, as usual, sat in the front seat. LOL!

By the time we finished supper, it was around 4 am. i remember reaching home close to 5 am, and seeing a bit of the sun rise before i plonked into bed. slept until 2 pm on new year day! hahaha! i can't remember much of what happened after that too, prob went for dinner with family or something. totally too concussed from the overnight gigging to remember anything else. haha. Oh yeah, we had teppanyaki at our house with auntie Phyllis n the maid, with beef n salmon n pork n stuff! so much food again! no wonder i'm gaining weight. after that went to play game while they watched the Little Nonya on TV. boring show, don't understand why pple like it. haha! Joan wanted to go Kallang but i was too tired out so sent her home n slept until 4 pm on friday!

2 Jan: Slept the day away, went out with Joan, bought Band of Brothers DVD and attended the wake of Chenguo's grandmother. Supposed to meet up with Millie, but in the end didn't so just sent Joan home and completed Crysis the final level at about 1 am in the morning. Haha!

3-4 Jan: KTV with JC guys, met Joan for dinner in town. Watched Transporter 3 w Sharlyn, Ivan, Millie, Ian, Nic, Irenus and Joan n felt really ripped off. Short service, went for a talk by Pst CK after svc, some trip to JB with a wedding exhibition n the kickstart of the Couples Ministry. Honestly i think such a ministry is a bit bo liao, there are already so many bible studies n courses to help couples, n they can always go to their CGL and other church friends for help, but if Pastor thinks this will help us, then we're willing to give it a go. Had fun fellowshipping w the cell group after that at the kopitiam, then went to take MRT to city hall to meet up with my family to have dinner - at Joan's favourite bedok bachor mee stall at block 85! not bad lah, quite nice n good portion of food. went home and attempted to complete another stage of LEft 4 Dead, but just before completing the stage, i DIED at the very last moment! super frustrated n annoyed, but too tired to continue playing liao. oh well, another day then.

5 Jan: Back to Work.. zzz... Only less than $300 left in my account to last me until 23 Jan (the 5 day cruise) which means about 18 days to go, and i can spend a max of $15 each day! haiz.. overbudgeted for building fund n totally forgot about the joint account n the insurance payments, until i finally worked out the amounts this morning! hopefully, i can decrease the BF to about $4000, so i can have enough to survive for the next few months...

Christmas 2008 and countdown to 2009!

2008-12-30T12:31:00.001+08:00

Think my last blog entry was on 24th Dec on Christmas eve, here's the continuation! (On a side note, I didn't realise that so many pple actually bother reading my blog, there isn't really anything interesting here, just the nonsensical emotional rambling of a 26 year old! hahaha.. but thanks for reading, don't take offense at some of the strong opinions here! =P)

Dec 24: Lunch w YQ n friends, Christmas service, Momo's birthday and Ip Man movie!

Left office at about 12.15 pm to meet up with Yongqiang for lunch at Vivocity, didn't realise he was bringing along another 2 friends, Mandy, a very loud and overly excited and friendly girl named Mandy, and the other girl, didn't talk at all, so I can't remember her name, I shall call her Wallpaper. Haha. But anyway thanks Yongqiang, for the delicious lunch (if i remember correctly, it was at Secret Recipe, and I ordered mushroom sauce chicken chop)and for a great time of fellowship! Its always great to catch up with old friends (not literally old as in age! haha!) and its also nice to meet new pple. Mandy is from New Creation, smokes, drinks, clubs and likes to talk to guys. Haha. No further comment needed. She used to be from CHC, but she said she couldn't stand the strict standards and the naggy cell group leaders, so she went to NCC where she can do whatever she likes and God will forgive her anyway. Haha! I was really quite amused by her thinking. But who cares, I'm there to pass YQ his Xmas card n have a nice lunch, not talk to her about her warped perception of Christianity. After lunch, went home for like an hour before going out with family n Mindice to Seletar Country Club for afternoon high tea! i was kind of amazed that i could still eat the supreme meesiam with chicken chop after my lunch! haha. then went for the Christmas services with family, neighbours Stanley n Carine, Alex and his family. Thank God managed to find seats quite easily. So total I brought 8 friends for Xmas! Hahaha.. Thought the drama was quite boring n too many stupid jokes thrown in, the singaporean dialects, the lame humour, the unfunny jokes, I was quite disapppointed, as the title sounded really big, "Operation Save The World" i.e. a copy of save the cheerleader from Heroes. Only part which I woke up (haha) was when the flying angels came at the ending scene. Now, that was cool! But it lasted all of 10 seconds. The message was short, the candles we held for the candlelight service kept being blown out by the air condition, so it was really annoying we had to relight the candles every half a minute. What a drag. Anyway the fun part of the night was after service, when Joan n I went to meet up with Momo, Jeanette, Jaric, Boon Kiat, Elaine, JJ, Clifford n a few others for Ip Man, the awesome kungfu movie! I must admit, the movie really cheered me up after my disappointment with the Christmas drama. it was action packed, really funny also (the part when the young kid cycled out n said "mummy says you better start fighting back or else more furniture will be broken") and touching as well. it really stirs up the nationalistic feeling in Chinese! pple in the cinema actually applauded when Donnie Yuen kicked the crap out of the Japanese guys! woohoo go Ip Man, kick those Jap-asses back to their own country! it was a damn good show, and best of all, the hero doesn't die in this movie! I really don't like sad-ending hero movies, when the hero has to sacrifice himself, or someone he loves has to die, n the show ends in a very sad way. Ip Man has a feeling of triumph n excitement, that no matter how dire n bad the circumstances, when one man fights for justice and righteousness, things will change for the better. Awesome action, realistic to the core, i don't mind getting the DVD for this movie! After the show, a few of us when to Swenson for supper. there was jeanette's boyfriend n the Shortguy who joined us as well. it was nice to have BK drive us home, as tired as he was, we cracked a heck of a lot of jokes while in his car. haha.. think i reached home around 5 am in the morning!

Dec 25: Christmas Lunch at Angus, shopping and nothing much

Didn't really do much on Xmas day. I think the sad thing is, no Christmas presents to open at all this year. I guess I really miss the joy n excitement of tearing open the presents which I used to get from friends n relatives. Since young, i used to get dozens of toys n books n stuff for Christmas, but i guess we're all grown up now, its time to do the giving. Had lunch at Angus (had to wake up at 11.15 am! super sleepy n stoned) the usual steak set lunch. walked around orchard shopping and bumped in to many of my parents' friends! it was like old pple outing to orchard! my bro said all the young pple are at orchard on Xmas eve partying n at home sleeping on Xmas day, n then all the old pple come out for lunch at orchard on Xmas day! quite true isn't it? bought some clothes n shirt for Joan's dad, then went to my house to sleep, buay tahan anymore. i can't remember how long i slept, must have been 1.5 hours or so. oh yeah, we went to a CAKE shop to buy cakes n other deserts for tea! man, i think i put on some weight, eat n sleep n eat n sleep for the festive season! hahaha! wanted to watch movie but the DVD had some problem, so after playing a bit of COD5 game, I sent Joan to the bus stop n went home to continue playing before sleeping. I know, very "nerd" n no life, always stuck at home playing computer games right? but i can't help it, i bought a new computer simply for immersing myself in the latest FPS games! n i still can't complete the campaigns on L4D! quite frustrating. LOL!

Dec 26: SF gig at Orchard, jamming with Michelle Lim n my brother's band

A really bad gig! Out of the 3 gigs which we played at orchard ( i only played for 2 out of the 3, missed the first one cos i was working) i felt this should be the worst one. out of time, players not concentrating, certain players forgetting their parts, no vibe, wrong speed for the wrong sequence, wrong assignment of instruments for players, no obvious signs of leading the performers, pple getting tired after a short march, no support for the octopus, n many many other mistakes, I made a few mistakes myself, especially getting tired after the march along orchard road, as it was my second time playing the sudo (1st time was at F1) and my arms got tired from smashing the mallet on the sudo drum skin! really need to work on my stamina, and also my performance skills, i was so stiff while playing the sudo, its quite different from dancing n swinging the tom around! the sudo is so big n difficult to move around, n i probably didn't adjust the correct height. i was quite annoyed by the wrong playing of certain players, i don't want to name names since pple read my blog, but i think they know who they are. could hear Chow kiat shouting "Wrong! Wrong!" at those certain pple when they played wrongly, or can see Ian stare at the person who played the extra beat.

If these pple don't even know they played wrongly, they shouldn't even be performing in a gig. How can you go into a performance without being well prepared? Skill, mental preparation, stamina, sense of timing, etc. All crucial to a good performance. Honestly i was quite annoyed, i thought we could've done way way way better than that. Even Rallen's super energetic performance couldn't save the day, nor CK's fantastic solos (even though even this guy made a few mistakes here n there), nor the grand finale of FHW. Could see Boon was really angry with us during n after the gig. Haiz.

At least most of us had fun during the gig! And thankfully, the audience loved it, lapped it all up, and asked for more! After the FHW, the emcee asked for one more sequence! we were all shocked, wondering whether or not to pack up, whether of not CK's RIP would surface, or what else is there which we can play! Haha! That was the joke of the day man. Hehz.. In the end, we just played the usual space jam sequence loops.

Went back to Joo Chiat studio for sheraton hotel gig practice, but had supper at Astons first, since the other group was practicing first. That was where we had the "suan Nic about Meiqi" session! hahaha.. Guankeat really likes to laugh at other pple! He doesn't even do it subtlely, he does it outrightly! Poor Nic, first shona, then meiqi.. he went for the Tic Tac Toe thingy last sunday, but still can't over the SF girls. haha..

After prac, jammed a few songs with my brother's band, was quite bad, they weren't prepared for the songs which we originally intended to jam, ended up playing a bit of rubbish, only 2-3 songs were alright, the rest sucked. the drummer really lost form, the lead gutarist couldn't flow with the band, Michelle can't sing rock songs, n i felt it was a waste of time. But at least we had supper at some prata place, before my bro went to send everyone home. Haha i don't have to be the taxi driver liao, ever since my bro got his licence. Reached home around 5 am again.

Dec 27: Sujin's wedding, JC friends mini-gathering

Didn't do much on saturday except sleep until 2 pm! haha! i can't believe it, the weather was so nice n windy n cloudy, it felt really shoik to sleep! went over to joan's place for her to get ready, (met up with a few SF peeps at the TPY macs, they were practicing their rack sequence) and reached the OCC restaurant at about 8.10 pm. Amazingly, we weren't the latest pple there. The wedding only started at 8.45 pm, and honestly it was a bit weird, some pple were wearing t-shirt and bermudas and slippers! Oh man, for my wedding, if they don't wear long sleeve and at least a jeans, i will ask my bouncers to throw them out. So disrespectful to the wedding couple! One good thing about the wedding is that it gave me a chance to catch up with my JC friends, Wilson, Yewkwan, Kevin, Yiwen, Adrian, Qinning and our class teacher Ms Siau. We had a lot of fun making fun of Bengthye n his KTV skills n the sleezy location of the wedding, and Raymond with his cannot-make-it flirting ways! Qinning is the next to get married, Joan noticed the big diamond ring on her finger. Oh man, what an obvious signal, the ring practically shouts "i'm getting married soon!" hahaha.. Oh n Cuixia and her short pudgy BF came late, after the 2nd course then they arrived, if i remember right. Then they both went out for a talk with Adrian (who has liked Cuixia for a long time) and Wilson n YK n I immediately started laughing about the possibilities. The food was alright lah, not too bad, but the fun was chatting with old classmates. Kinda scary now that everyone is grown up n working n getting married!

Dec 28: Last service and last MTT for 2008! Dinner at the Jap marche (expensive & very average)

Nothing much, short service, quick lunch with YQ n Drew n Jennifer Chen, MTT with 2 new friends n the Boon welcome speech, dinner at the Shukudo or something, spent about $30 for Joan n myself, but the food was very average, n i honestly don't like such self-service places, its just an expenseive food court! n they still charge service charge 10% on the bill.. but nevermind lah, since its the last meal with all the SF pple for 2008. Had pratice until quite late, reached home about 12.30 am. Millie came back from her KL trip with her office pple, showed us some photos of her trip n pic of Jaslyn (of SF) going clubbing w her. some pple really aren't who they seem to be eh, go SOT, all holy n stuff, but when they get a chance to unwind, literally let all hell break loose. Though Millie was gone for only 3 days, it felt like we hadn't seen her for along time! Hhaha.. That's how close we are, brothers n sisters in the SF! Millie was telling us about the dream she had, about Nic doing something really stupid n ruining the SF performance, n the scary thing is, it could actually happen! LOL! but it just shows how much she misses SF, even though its only a 3-day trip.

Dec 29: Rash outbreak, last dinner with Joan at Pizzaplace at city hall, SF prac for countdown n chilling out with David!

Took MC, went home n slept until 2.30 pm (again!) before eating lunch, downloading the track n playing Crysis. Pretty uneventful day, just a day to really rest, catch up on sleep n relax at home. Had practice at studio in the evening, but ended quite early (comparatively to other practices, even though we still left studio at 11 pm!). Played Crysis until 3 am (hahaha) and now i'm zombified in office, just wasting time away until 6.30 pm, when we go to boss house for company dinner. Hope it ends no later than 9 pm, i really have no mood to chitchat about trivial things n spend time at some place where i don't wish to be.

Time to start planning my goals for 2009.. here's a list which i thought of, just off the top of my mind:

1. start coming to office on time (i.e. reach before 9 am)
2. start sleeping earlier (12.30 am latest)
3. start exercising, jog twice a week, 30 sit ups twice a week, 30 push ups twice a week.
4. start reading the Bible from the beginning, praying for at least 20 min after reading the Bible, before sleeping.
5. learn to understand girls (esp Joan) better
6. spend less money on cabs (max take cab twice a week)
7. complete building fund
8. resume Bible study classes after coming back from Dubai trip
9. start to treat my family more often to meals n stuff
10. spend more time with the cell group (haha! if possible =P)
11. start planning my career path
12. cancel credit card if unable to control my spending! ( just signed up for a free 3 year trial with standard chartered visa card last wednesday with a girl names Posh, can you believe it, i never imagined pple actually calling themselves Posh, what a stupid name! but the 3 year free trial is not bad, plus i get 10% rebate every time i use the card to pay for things. every $100 i spend, i get $10 back 2 months later. not a bad deal, thought i'd try it out.)

God, 2008 has been a very unique year for me. I can't say its all bad or all good, but really a mixture of highs n lows. I've really never had such a roller coaster of a year before. I mean in all things, spiritually, emotionally, in my finances, in my ministry, in my relationship with Joan, my cell group, evangelism, at work, relationship with boss, my personal time, etc.. every aspect has seen the ups n downs in 2008. I suppose its been that way for many pple as well, though for me honestly its been quite an unnerving n a little scary. ok scratch that, its horribly scary at times. yeah, i'm not a super human, i have fears n doubts about many things, even being a "lawyer". sometimes friends n other pple tend to think, once i become a lawyer, i'm set for life. good pay, good job, whats there to worry about? well, they don't see the other side of the coin. being a lawyer also equals more stress, more scoldings from bosses, less time for family n friends, less time for personal alone time, less time to play drums n pursue my interests. pple also expect more from you, have a certain awe or keep a distance from me (whether subconciously or not) and i really don't wish to disclose my job as a lawyer if i don't have to. God, i hope 2009 will be a much better year for me, i'll try my best to improve myself n change all the bad habits n wrong attitudes n mentality that i have.

In Jesus name,
Amen

The most happening weekend of December 2008 yet! Haha!

2008-12-23T12:15:00.003+08:00

Too much stuff to type out, but just gonna summarise the events that took place over the weekend, starting from meeting Joan on friday night to get a card for Julia's birthday!

19 Dec - Julia's birthday party, SF gathering at Mecure hotel

Meet joan at city hall to get a card while waiting for Liting to arrive cos she was like, oh man, one hour late! Joan was annoyed n I quite irritated as well, but when Liting arrived, I was surprised that Joan didn't scold her. Haha. We bought a card from the basement bookshop, i think is Times bookshop, and walked around a bit, getting some snack n drinks, waiting for Liting. Anyway we took mrt to tampines and then took a bus to the SAFRA. oh man, its so far away, but quite nice lah the place. its actually a small ktv lounge with a stage, but Rallen transformed it into a performance stage with a jazz acoustic set, very nicely done! He also folded 999 roses from tissue paper for her as decor for the stage! Small candles glowing everywhere adding to the "chill out" atmosphere.

There were about 3 bands playing i think, Julia sang a duet with a friend, her poly friends, church friends, Strikeforce friends, and other small groups of pple, but of cos SF pple were the most! I think there were about 15-20 of us there at least. Millie saw me eating with Joan and Liting and came over to kick my leg, saying how can i eat with Liting, won't Joan get jealous?? I was like, huh? We're just eating dinner leh, even Joan also never complain, why she kick me. Haha.. Oh, n poor Millie lost her camera that day, dunno if she managed to find it. =p

SF sang Always Be My Baby to Julia, Boon played guitar, Neo and I sang, and it was all messed up and funny! But ok lah, i guess its the heartfelt thanks and effort that counts! it was all fun and we had a good laugh.

Later we went to mecure by boon's van, (haha cos i was carrying the heavy amp i got a lift from him!) and went to chill out in the room. its quite big, had a living room and a bedroom, on the 14th floor. we watched SF videos and laughed at our mistakes, then played the game TABOO. oh man, we played it for like 2 hours i think? cos it was really super funny, and Nic surprisingly was very good at this game! it made pple panic, esp Joan, and made pple pekchek n frustrated, like Yongqiang, and made pple talk nonsense and come up with the wittiest sentences as well! This is a fun game, i think i can try it for cell group next time. if i'm ever gonna do games again. -_- but anyway, we had fun, and after the game we decided to walk to Macdonalds for supper, i think it was around 2 am at that time. Ian, Millie, Nic, Meiqi, Joan, Yuhong and myself. i loved it, the wind was blowing, it was relaxing and we had a good time just chilling out. Went back to the hotel n most of them went to sleep, except Yuhong n i who went to the pool side n played guitar until 6.30 am, and Joan n i went home. I concussed at about 8 am, slept till around 1 pm.

20 Dec - Gathering at Kelly's house

Supposed to meet at 2 pm at Sengkang, but at 2.30 pm joan n i were still on the bus 163. haha! we ate lunch, and then played Guitar Hero with the drums, 2 gutars and a mike! really fun, i super enjoyed myself. Joan had a boxing match with Junhao, which she won like twice! hahaha! the Wii games were quite fun also, but honestly i prefer the guitar hero thing! Only $300 for the set, not bad. Videos and pictures are up on Kelly's blog. I think from the time we arrived (same time as yingyan n Jerald) at about 3 pm until we left at 8.45 pm, we spent close to 6 hours hanging out. haha.. i can't believe we played games until 7 pm in the evening, then we watched Kung Fu panda while eating Pizza Hut. 2 large pizza n we only paid $5 each! quite ok i guess. The gathering was super fun, even though there were only quite few of us, i think about 11 or so. any more pple n it would've been over crowded actually! haha.. Thanks to Jerald n Lishan who helped to organise this event, and of cos, initiated by yours truly.

Went off at about 8.45 pm for practice at Joo Chiat, where unpleasant event happened, but i don't want to talk about it, best to forget it ever happened. Was a lousy practice, felt it was a waste of time. most pple there don't even know the exact sequence or know how to play the parts. by the time i reached home, it was about 1 plus am, n went to bathe n sleep, n had a talk with Joan over the phone over an issue. again, too depressing to mention, but its resolved so its ok now.

21 Dec - Sun svc and the orchard gig, and dinner at Crystal Jade

Was late for sun svc, woke up at about 12 pm. by the time we reached the main hall it was the announcements. preaching was about pretty basic stuff, i guess the main thing is psyching everyone up for the Christmas svcs, so not very long preaching. had lunch w e CG pple, sebas, soohuei looked half dead. dunno why but again, the very sian feeling was eminating from our cg. Kenneth wasn't around, so we went to makan at the usual kopitiam, then chatted with Peijin abit on the way to the mrt station. Poor gal, she paid $4800 deposit for the publisher to publish her manga, but she isn't able to finish the book in time, and the deposit will just be forfeited! hope she somehow manages to finish it lah.

the gig wasn't really one of the best gigs we had, while the usual sequences were ok, not fantastic but ok, ck's RIP sequence was really messy n everyone forgot one part, which looked really bad. out of the 8 UDMs, 3 had no water as well, a logistics nightmare. however, the energy was high, the shakers n toy players were dancing their hearts out (including Joan!) and the crowd liked the performances, although honestly we were quite out of time while marching down the street n playing. i guess we really need to practice playing n walking long distances! its just quite different from playing in a fixed position.

had dinner at the noodle crystal jade place, was quite nice n quite reasonable pricing. then went to eat tang yuan at chinatown to celebrate yuan siao jie or some chinese festival thingy. by the time i reached home, it was close to midnight, n i played a bit of COD5 before going to sleep, damn i only wanted to play for an hour, but the game is so engaging i played until about 2.30 am before deciding to turn in! dunno why pple say its not very nice, i think its quite alright. i wanna complete the solo campaign, then can play the zombie mode! hopefully can complete it before end of the year, i mean, i think i only got 1 or 2 more missions to complete!

22 Dec - Xmas dinner with DLPians and supper with the bug in my teh ping!

had the gift exchange thingy with my office colleagues, while having dinner at hog's breath cafe at vivocity, not bad, we had 50% off the main course due to some special promotion. the food was good, the fellowship was fun. i spent about $37 on the meal, not too bad lah, considering we had appetisers besides the main course, n i ate like 1/3 of Ruby's steak cos she couldn't finish it!

Finally, the supper with clarence, Mikki, Michelle, Daryl n Joan at prata place. oh man, i really don't think i'm going back there agin after the horrible experience of sucking a bug up the straw into my mouth! pics on facebook for the size of the bug, its really disgusting, i almost wanted to puke had the guys not started laughing n makin fun of it! honestly i wanted to scold them, but decided it would be a waste of my effort. who cares man.. at least i didn't need to pay for my drink. yucks! =P

wanted to play the game a bit, but was really too tired, think by the time i sent everyone home n reached home it was about 1.30 am. too many days of insufficient sleep is taking its toll on me.. gonna sleep early tonight, after wrapping the presents n going for a short jog with Joan. i shall attempt to complete my 2.4 within 15 min! haha..

Tml having lunch w yongqiang, then gonna go home n SLEEP! take a short afternoon nap before going for high tea with family n neighbours, then going for Christmas svc at expo, dunno what "operation save the world". sounds lame. i liked last years Christmas at Changs musical, i think its really hard to beat that kind of standard! hopefully it'll be just as good or better tml! hahha..

Merry Christmas everyone!! God bless you all!

3.30 pm on a friday afternoon!

2008-12-19T15:19:00.002+08:00

Alright, just about another 2.5 hours to go before 6 pm, until the weekend of parties arrive! woot!

Today is the first time i'm wearing jeans to office, its feels so good! And the shoes, much better than the working boring leather shoes (which are a tad too big for my feet)! Feels kinda relaxing today, plus my boss is on the plane to australia, and my big boss has not come back from his overseas business trip, the only "senior" partner in office today is Yvonne (big boss' wife) and she only came in after lunch, n she'll probably leave around 5 pm or so. what a good life man!

Anyway I didn't really do much today either, just read some agreements and edited some documents and sent a few emails. Basically spent about an hour or so surfing facebok, and after lunch another hour or so writing Christmas cards, in fact i still got about 10+ cards to write, but i'm actually tired of writing Christmas messages, so taking a break to chill by blogging.

Anyway, here's the plan for the long weekend!

Tonight at 6 pm - go for a drink with colleagues
7.30 pm - Julia's party
10/11 pm - Strike Force outing at mecure hotel
Saturday 1 pm - primary sch gathering
8 pm - SF prac at JC
Sunday evening - SF gig or Lawry's Prime Ribs dinner! Posh place, woot!

Last night also really enjoyed myself spending time with Joan, just catching a simple dinner, then buying pillow, then watching Yes Man, the romantic comedy starring Jim Carey. Really funny and feel good kind of movie, Joan n i loved it.

The end of 2008 is drawing near, perhaps I should reflect on what I've done in the past year of my life and set some goals for 2009. Maybe in another post! LOL!

Shopping trip to buy Joan's present!

2008-12-18T14:21:00.003+08:00

Last night had a fun time shopping with Millie, Melisa and Yiwei (Yanqin's elder sister, Yanqin joined us later at Heeren but I went to meet Rallen around that time liao) at orchard. After dinner at far east plaza (at the ramen place that sucked big time, Mel n I couldn't eat the noodles cos it was so bad, n Millie dropped one of her prawns on the floor n was quite annoyed! haha), we went to some perfume shop cos Yiwei wanted to buy perfume for her boyfriend. They got together about 6 months ago, according to Melisa. Then Millie was thinking of getting this bottle of purple colour perfume, think the name is like Lankin or something. But anyway I smsed Melisa to convince Millie not to buy, so that Ian can buy it as a Xmas present for her, but when Melisa got my sms, she said loudly, "Oui Weiwen, you sms me for what?" and then Millie so kpoh go and see my sms to her, totally spoil my plan man! We were laughing for like 5 minutes after that lah! Hahaha..

In the end Millie did buy the perfume for $55 (actual price $126) and then we went hunting for Joan's Xmas present. Actually we didn't take too long to find the suitable present, cos Millie remembered this shop at far east where Joan said the clothes very nice, so I selected the item and they all agreed that it suited Joan and it was very nice. Haha! I'm a fast shopper.

Anyway after that we went to the perfume section at Taka cos Yiwei wanted to buy the really branded perfume for her boyfriend and she took like half hour to sample and select the perfumes lah, while Millie n I just talked crap and joke about Ian and Joan. Haha! Kidding lah, we were talking about our plans for Xmas. Oh, n how to find boyfriend for Melisa as well! Haha..

Met Rallen at somerset MRT cos he wanted to borrow an amp from my bro. That guy, he's really very detailed n good at planning, he folded 999 paper roses for Julia, which will be part of the decor for the stage at her party, and he's getting a band to perform for the night, n there will be 2 surprises for her. I asked him to do a drum solo for her, he almost freaked out man! he's alread quite stressed about playing in front of Boon n other drummers, but then again, its for Julia n not for anyone else so i told him to relax lah. seriously, he folded about 200+ roses in a day, and spent the last few days just folding the roses and planning for the party! what a committed boyfriend! Julia must be happy to be with him, hehz.

Going to Millie's cg later tonight, though I think its clearly a waste of time, its just some cg outreach thingy, i would rather play computer games at home! man i upgraded my PC just so i can enjoy the new games leh, its so unfair that i finally got my PC fixed up and now got so little time to play games. i think i will not go tonight, it totally doesn't concern me actually, being another cell group's outreach. -_-

Really funny stuff still ringing in my mind! Haha!

2008-12-17T14:14:00.002+08:00

Taken from Corola's performance song at AC2008, the actual one goes:

Harvest, harvest, harvest
I can see the harvest, etc..

Asian version:

Malaysia, Malaysia, Malaysia
It is truly Asia, Asia Asia...

Strikeforce versions:

Neo, Neo, Neo
He can play the sudo, sudo, sudo
He's the Strikeforce hero, hero, hero
Neo plays the sudo!

Rohan, Rohan, Rohan
Play until buay tahan, tahan, tahan
Cannot lift the sudo, sudo, sudo
Just trying to be a hero

(thought about this while at Millie's birthday BBQ while we were playing at the park!)

What a great weekend!

2008-12-15T14:15:00.002+08:00

Alright, back in office on a monday, but everyone's pretty much in a holiday mood already. Except for certain clients who's really kan cheong about certain matters, but I can't really be bothered about that, i feel quite annoyed with them n the other side's lawyer, who happily went overseas this week without letting me or his clients know.

But anyway, here's a brief summary of what happened over the weekend!

12 Dec - Thanksgiving cell group and supper with William, Nadia and Joan.

Really had an enjoyable cell group meeting with games, thanksgiving speeches, no preaching or singing at all, just basically time for us to give thank you speeches to all our cell group members. Regrettably, Joan n i haven't really been interacting with the cell group very much, so we aren't really that "gum" with them, so hopefully we'll try to make an effort to spend more time with them n build better relationship. I mean, they're nice pple n all, really hope we can get to know them better next year. Oh and i really enjoyed the fellowship with William and Nadia at geylang beef kway tiao shop, although i almost got knocked down by a car while going to collect the "hao jian" from the shop across the road! hahaha.. what a scary experience! Its really nice of william to drive us all home. Oh yes, he has some problem with traffic police, hopefully i can help him with the matter..

13 Dec - Shaun's holy matrimony, Bolt with michelle and Clarence playing L4D at my place

Really didn't want to go for the ceremony on sat morning, but Joan called me n bugged me that we should go, so i obliged in the end, was quite pai seh cos never gave him any ang bao. i mean i really got not much money left for the rest of december, with birthdays n other weddings to attend. Plus i'm not even that close to shaun n his wife ailing or something. but in the end we took cab down n it was quite enjoyable meeting up with ex-cg members n CL zone friends. went town to watch Bolt (not the 3D version though) at grand cathay. its a really touching n family friendly show about a really heroic n cute dog who is faithful to his owner, along with a cyncial cat n a very funny n semi-crazy hamster! the hamster's lines are really the best in the show, the inspirational speech, the super funny lines at the funniest moments! superbly crafted story n dialouge, very cute n realistic dog, except the huge head! i really don't mind getting the DVD for this movie n watching it again, its so cute.

14 Dec - SF thanksgiving gathering!

chionging for service (with the dancing buildings for the Ela song! LOL!) and then having a quick lunch w the cg, before going for MTT where we learnt this offbeat "Cup of Life" intro, really hard to learn! Boon had his half hour speech again, before we went to his mum's new condo for a potluck dinner n games! The games were really quite fun n funny too, it sure was noisy n rowdy! had the "Boon Talk Show!" with Ian n millie sharing about how they got together, n everyone was given a chance to share about how Boon and the Strikeforce changed their lives. it was awesome, the sense of belonging n brotherhood in the Strikeforce! it seems that most of us were indeed inspired n motivated by Boon's long speeches, even though we may joke about the long speeches, secretly many of us really are impacted by those speeches! amazing time with the pple i love, the Strikeforce.

15 Dec - signing the legal docs and giving $78000 for the 15% down payment

so scary, giving the developer such a large amt of money! n the legal fees are like $16k, so much money just to process a couple of documents! then had lunch at Sizzlers with Joan and mum, ate a really full lunch, even though its just salad mostly! the salad buffet was really good, i'm honestly surprised at the high standard of food in a heartland HDB area! a fruitful monday morning, and now back to work.. another 4 days of work for 2008! (or before my boss goes overseas lah! hahaah!)

Half day more of work, and next week 4 days of work to go, before boss flies overseas..!

2008-12-11T11:54:00.003+08:00

Things to do for the remainder of December 2008:

1. Prepare ang bao for Shaun's wedding
2. Buy Christmas present for Joan
3. Write Xmas cards to friends and family
4. Buy gift for gift exchange for Hongyee
5. Bake Muffins with Joan as Xmas presents for friends
6. Wrap presents I bought
7. Prepare food item for pri sch gathering pot luck on 20 Dec
8. Prepare gift for DLP new year dinner at boss house on 30 Dec
9. Prepare angbao for Sujin's wedding on 27 Dec
10. Prepare clothes for SF overnight stay on 19-20 Dec
11. Love offering for Boon - depends on how much cash left after all the shopping!

To be added on when I think of more things that need to be done. What a busy Christmas, so many weddings n outings! Expensive leh, so many birthdays, weddings, celebrations, gatherings, etc!

New computer, got SF salary, KTV with SF and LAN with Bk n gang!

2008-12-09T10:16:00.002+08:00

What a hectic weekend! Will just blog a summary of events since last Friday evening!

5 Dec - buying the new parts for the computer and installing them.. until almost 12 am in the morning!

6 Dec - pay day for Strike Force - $1750 in total, gave $100 to SF fund, spent $1600 for the 5 day cruise during CNY in Jan 2009, and kept a miserable $50 to myself. oh well, i guess i have really got to sacrifice n save up a bit more.. Joan got $1200 i think, which she is saving up for her studies for next year. Anyway after getting our pay n our presents (2 CDs, 1 DVD and 1 pair of sticks!) from Boon, Joan n i went to meet my parent n my aunt n cousin for lunch at chinatown area, after booking the 5 day cruise. Joan wasn't too sure about it, n honestly i'm not exactly keen on going to cruise doing CNY n spending so much money on it also, but my parents really want to spend time with me, so i felt as their son i had to make an effort to spend time with them too. my mum was just complaining i have so many church activities n don't really spend time with the family anymore, so i guess i need to spend more time with them, while they're still fit n healthy.

Oh, Joan brought me to this cool shop at chinatown point, which sells all the dragon stuff n cosplay things. we'll prob have a few of those things on display in our house next time!

at night we went over to my cousin rebecca's 21st birthday at her house, n man it was so cramped with her friends n relatives, there was hardly place to stand n eat! the food was good, all home-cooked, but the cake was really horrible. looked nice, tasted yucky. i mean compared to Joan's birthday cake, i'm sorry to say the cream cake for rebecca's birthday tasted bad. hahaha.. but anyway we didn't have much to do there except watch AVP, n then went home to catch Thank You For Smoking, a really good movie.

I really appreciate Joan for spending so much time with me this weekend, despite the fact that her exam is today and she has 3 exam papers.. thinking back, perhaps i should have let her go home to study on saturday night, or on sunday night after MTT.. sigh, but whats done is done, n she says she has confidence for the exams, so i believe her. i just hope to God that she's really done her studying n is really ready for the exams, which begins in exactly 1 hours from the time i'm typing this..

7 Dec - Svc w dr john avazini, MTT and KTV at chinatown kbox until 4 am on monday morning! pics will be up on facebook soon! adventures of SF at the supermarket! the screaming singers of SF, annoyed with the $35 bill! hahaha.. we had a lot of fun, but we were really exhuasted after singing until about 3.30 am, and had to take cab home in the rain.

8 Dec - woke up at about 12.30 pm, so basically about half the day was gone. spent the afternoon fixing up the com n installing programs with daryl n my brother's help, then had to WALK down 13 storeys because the lift was under maintenance! i was really annoyed, n the stairs were quite dark too. eventually met up with bowen n BK for lan at park lane, played a bit of BF2 and Left 4 Dead until 11.30 pm, n went for supper at the tau hway stall. Thanks to BK for sending all of us home, although he was really very tired as well! he's going into NS on friday, really hope the experience will make him a better man in Christ!

actually wanted to go visit Joan n surprise her with something, but i guess i'll save the money for her Christmas present, anyway its just mock exams n nothing major, so i guess its not really very important.. although honestly i feel bad for not visiting her, when she always visits me before my exam starts, no matter how late or how tired she is.. i still remember she came to encourage me with a balloon in 2007, when i was taking my final law exams in NUS, cos i was really very stressed n worried about my studies. i was so touched, i think i cried whenever i saw the balloon, n felt so blessed n loved by this wonderful girlfriend.

Don't worry Joan, i will definitely visit you more when u're nearing your actual exams, i will constantly encourage u, n will try not to say anything discouraging or negative. I know u read my blog almost everyday, in fact, i keep this blog only for God and you, a very few friends whom i trust n thats it.

Last thing i did last night n first thing i did this morning was to pray for your exams, n that you will do well, n be calm n confident, n you'll be able to glorify God in your studies. I love you so much, I really do. =)

A slack friday!

2008-12-05T14:14:00.002+08:00

Alright, its mid-day, after lunch, n i'm feeling really sleepy cos i only slept like 3-4 hours yesterday night, or rather this morning.

Just realised that I've been meeting Joan almost everyday for the past few days! Haha.. on Wed we met up for dinner just because i missed her n wanted to have dinner with her, then it was pure coincidence that she ran into Mikki, and Millie called me for my opinion on what to buy for Ian, then she said she was at Funan, so she can join Joan n I at raffles city shopping centre for dinner at Soup Spoon. after dinner we went to have Ben & Jerry ice cream, Joan has been craving for it for a long time ever since we celebrated clarence's birthday at grand cathay's B&J. We were just talking about Millie n Ian n stuff n just chilling out.

On thursday (last night), we went shopping at taka n wisma, and we bupmed in to alot of pple! saw lydia out shopping with her friend, then we saw eunice ding, then we also bumped into shaun n yongji! what a small world. we went to (where else?) swensons at about 10 pm to have supper with some SF pple to celebrate Ian's birthday. i can't believe we were there from 10 pm until about 1.30 am! thats like 3.5 hours, just sitting there chit chatting n slacking n eating! Ian had 2 birthday cakes, one for sharing, one icecream on the house! Sharlyn was telling us the story of how she n Ivan met n fell in love, it was a really interesting story n its amazing how she can remember all the details, what time they met, what clothes they were wearing, who said what, etc!! its freaking scary man, the amt of things that she can remember which happened so long ago! Ivan totally can't remember anything, or so he claims. Pictures all uploaded on facebook already, anyway its not so much of the number of pple who went, but the quality of the friendship there. Boon, Nic, Ruyuan, Ian, Millie, Sharlyn, Julia, Shona, Yongqiang, and of course my darling Joan were there, and it was a really fun time of fellowship.

tonight Daryl's coming over to my place to upgrade my CPU, overhaul the whole damn thing with $900+ worth of new processor, new ram, new graphics card, even new power supply. He's a nice chap, hope he comes back to church soon instead of being so devoted to his paint ball! then going to meet Joan for dinner at 8.30 when she ends sch.

now its only 3.30 pm in the afternoon, another 2.5 hours to burn before i go home! i'm so stoned i can't do any work, and anyway there is no work for me to do honestly.

Joan's birthday

2008-12-03T10:19:00.001+08:00

Better blog about it now before I really get busy over the next few days with the current deal that i'm doing. I've some breathing space now cos boss is busy preparing a deal for signing today, and once the client signs, she'll be bringing all of us out for a nice lunch, before embarking on the next project, which is to be completed before she flies off on 19 December. oh yes, and i almost forgot next Monday is hari raya, holiday! so that means minus today, there's only TEN (10) working days left for me to endure before boss flies overseas n the firm basically takes a break, most pple going on leave, i think i will take maybe one day leave, depending on whether joan will be free. I want to take a day off to spend it with her, even though there's not really any special occasion until christmas.

Ok back to the main thing! Joan's birthday.

Didn't really go so well, as i woke up with such a bad sorethroat that i needed to go to doctor n get some medicine. i was thinking whether or not to get MC so i can cancel my leave due to the MC, but then it will look suspicious, so i thought, forget it. joan overslept n missed her morning class, which led to another blast of sms exchanges, and i was feeling pretty lousy around lunch time. went to take a nap after lunch (still so exhausted from the gig n the BBQ) before going to meet joan at the grand cathay at about 4 pm. actually i think i reached about 4.20 pm, but i was honestly quite annoyed n not in a mood to go out, but because its Joan's birthday, i brushed all those negative thoughts aside, i mean most important is to make her happy n celebrate her birthday with her right?

initially wanted to bring her to this jap-western fusion restaurant at the central at clark quay, but since she wanted to try the tomato place at PS basement, we went there instead. 25% discount on orders before 6 pm, plus the reasonable prices, so i only paid $27 for two meals! and its not cheap lousy food, its beef steak with prawns for Joan and pork chop with sausages n pasta for me, complete with mushroom soup, garlic bread, n ice lemon tea! that dinner really cheered me up, n we really enjoyed the food. the ambience was a bit too noisy n the ceiling too low, but otherwise its really value for money.

after dinner we decided to go walk around orchard (oh yeah we bumped into Victoria n her bf too) n take photos of the Xmas decor, n also did a bit of xmas shopping (photos will be uploaded on facebook!) mostly window shopping. but there were these really cool Christmas toys n display items, trains, houses, music boxes, nativity scene, etc, all those nice n delicately crafted Christmas items being displayed at Paragon! i think each item cost around $100-400, except the mini-music boxes, which was about $50 each if i remember correctly. Joan n i spent more than half an hour just admiring the Christmas display items, really brings a smile to our faces. we were thinking, when we have our house, we'll put all these christmassy stuff up during Christmas season! we bought some christmas cards to send out to our friends, then we went to Taka side of orchard road to take more pics. we also went inside some large tent set up by some diamond n jewellery company (Sookee? can't remember, some cheaper local brand) whereby the diamond rings n stuff were up to 70% off but still very expensive, each item over $1000. but Joan said its really quite cheap for diamond rings, but too bad we're only getting married 2 years later. plus, they don't have the designs that we like, the designs there are too old fashion, one big diamond sticking out on the ring. joan doesn't like that kind, she prefers the rounded kind, a ring of diamonds. something like the kind that Ian gave millie! we did a bit more window shopping at Taka before walking back to Cathay, i was so blur i almost wanted to walk to PS! haha..

bought nachos n chips for the horror movie, a spanish show called Highway KM31 or something. we thought it would be good cos the spanish zombie show REC was pretty good, but this one, beginning was quite intense, but after a while got pretty predictable, n the ending really sucked. oh, n they claim its based on a true story. i bet the only "truth" in the show is that there's some highway whereby there's a lot of accidents n pple died there. because the show is FULL of loopholes, wrong sequences, obviously illogical parts. for e.g., in the tunnel, the police man went in before the male lead, but somehow, the male lead managed to get head of the police man in the next scene, to find his girlfriend. Joan was like ," thats not possible, there's only one way in the tunnel, how can he pass the police man first?" hahaha.. several other loopholes in the movie gave us a very bad impression that the movie was badly scripted. but still, there were a few decent scares, even if copied from Ju-on or the Ring. I could tell the movie sucked because Joan wasn't really scared at all. haha!

after the movie i sent Joan home n very reluctantly went to take cab home. i know i selected the lousy show, i started an arguement with her in the morning, i was late in meeting her, i wasn't able to surprise her with the dinner place, even the presents were no surprise to her, the CD n the eye cream n the underarm laser treatment. i honestly felt very disappointed with myself for not being able to make her really happy on her birthday. well, true, we did enjoy ourselves for most of the time, but i just felt i could've put in a bit more effort to make it a truly memorable day, instead of an average date out. of course Joan doesn't know how disappointed i was in myself because i hid it pretty well from her, and i'm glad she enjoyed the dinner outing n "pak tor" session along orchard, and i really hope this coming Christmas, i'm able to make it up to her n make it the most memorable christmas for her. Its our 2nd Christmas since we're together.

Joan's exams are next week on tues n thurs, so after that, we can really go out n celebrate n enjoy the rest of the december holidays. 2 n a half weeks of work left before boss goes overseas n we can really chill out. =)

Joan's Birthday BBQ, Millie's 21st birthday, a SF gig on Sat and Joan's actual birthday outing!

2008-12-02T17:32:00.002+08:00

Too much to blog about all the events that happened in the past 4 days, suffice to say, i've had a really fun n tiring n exciting long weekend (minus the sorethroat and the couple squabbles during the past few days) n it kind of feels so weird to be back at work after enjoying the weekend so much! Well, not all was fun n happy though, i actually quarrelled with joan i think about 3 times, once before reaching Millie's chalet, second at her BBQ, n even in the morning of her brithday itself.. sigh. When I think about it I even feel a little heartache. But I'm here to blog about the good stuff first!

1. Millie's birthday

After work, had a drink with colleagues (on an empty stomach) and met up with Joan to go to the aranda chalet together, halfway on the journey i felt so sick n broke out in cold sweat all over my body n almost wanted to puke! i will never ever drink on an empty stomach ever again! that was a horrible experience! anyway that led to a short quarrel with Joan, saying i never take care of myself, n other things i can't remember, only that i was so pissed off i almost didn't want to go to the party. but things worked out alright in the end, we had a lot of fun sitting the swing n doing other fun stuff at pasir ris park, after the cake cutting with Millie, Yanqin n Jeremy. there were really a lot of pple there, i think as many as 60 pple scattered thru out the chalet n BBQ pit! Ian gave flowers to Millie n they look so happy together, i'm almost envious of them. Haha. but there were so many pple in the chalet n it felt so crowded, rohan, christine, neo, daryl, julia, meqi, nic, joan n myself spent about 2 hours playing at pasir ris park, rather than sit n watch the stephen chow movie in the chalet. everyone went home close to 2 am except joan n i, who stayed to fellowship n watch another movie with millie's friends, quite funny, i think i laughed quite loudly n woke the sleeping pple. hehz. we hung around until about 6 am before catching a cab home.

2. Sat - the gig without Boon!

Sat's gig was quite funny, a bit messy, but quite fun overall. reid made a super obvious mistake, n the FHW was speeding up n slowing down at different parts, n some pple were annoyed with each other, the vibe wasn't so good. but like what joan said, for a gig without Boon, its actually not too bad. a shame we didn't play flightphesy to warm up!

oh n we went to shop at ntuc near joan's house with yishan, toonsiong, bk n of cos joan. then at night after the gig we went to suntec carefour to buy smoked salmon. it was expensive! but ok lah, worth it.

3. Joan's Birthday BBQ

bowen n BK really helped out a lot at the BBQ, so many thanks to these guys! also, thanks to everyone who helped out, n those who made the effort to come down eventhough they're not that close to joan, she was really quite touched. i think i spent like $200+ for everything for the BBQ, and that's not even including the food stuff provided by my mum, joan's mum, clarence mum (the cake!) and the packet food my dad bought from the coffeeshop behind my house! there were really too many pple, i think about 50+ pple who came in total, although a few left early.

i'm happy that joan really enjoyed herself, n she loves being with all of her friends, just chilling n chatting n eating n relaxing. i mean, the effort n sweat n running up n down n driving pple around is all worth it, as long as my dear is happy. =) just thinking about her brings a smile to my face.

i think she got about 6-7 presents at the BBQ? not sure cos too many groups of pple there liao. good thing the cake was really huge n there was quite a big piece left over, taken care of by yuhong. haha. oh n i remember for me the most fun (or funny!) part was when junyi drove his car by blasting retro music, n we all dance mambo around his car! that was really hilarious, stupid, lame but fun too! mambo music rocks! hahaha. the strikeforce pple came quite late, but they got the best food reserved specially for them. haha.

think i'll blog about joan's actual birthday celebration another time. i'm going home for dinner.

oh yeah, this year firm is damn stingy with holidays, only 2 days off, of which one is compulsory leave! basket, this is ridiculous, i really feel boss is being quite unreasonable. but what to do, once i get my bonus, n the economy recovers, i'm getting my ass out of this place.

An exciting weekend in the works! (if it doesn't rain this weekend!)

2008-11-28T09:33:00.002+08:00

Millie's birthday chalet (staying overnight if not raining!) - 28 Nov 2008
Buying BBQ food (w BK n friends) - 29 Nov 2008
SF gig at ritz carlton (playing lead snare! been a long time since I played lead, time to rock the place n get it on!) - 29 Nov 2008
Joan's birthday BBQ party (6-11 pm) - 30 Nov 2008
Dinner with Joan on actual birthday (pick her up at 4 pm to bring her for a nice romantic dinner) - 1 Dec 2008

And I got a pleasant surprise, I just got paid yesterday from my firm! Went to draw money on the way home n saw my salary deposited to my bank account already! Alright, have cash to spend for the weekend n the rest of December liao!

Bought mum n bro's Xmas presents, still left my dad's present n Joan's Xmas present to be bought.

As 2008 draws to a close, some pple are already in the Christmas mood! Time to start inviting pple for Expo Christmas svc! Woohoo!

Asia Conference 2008

2008-11-24T17:58:00.002+08:00

So many things still on my mind from the Asia Conference 2008. Some of them are really good, some not so good, some downright bad. I've not much time to blog since I assume I'll be spending the next few days in office catching up on work, but here's what I would want to blog about if I had the time, possibly later in the night:

1. personal revelations during the services
2. Strikeforce related stuff
3. Benny Hinn "prophecies"
4. overall feel of AC08
5. Joan (over the 5 day period) and her views on AC08
6. starting the day with a prayer really helps!
7. Joan's birthday

Alright! Leave approved! Asia conference, here I come!

2008-11-18T10:50:00.002+08:00

Really wanna thank God that my leave got approved by my boss! Now I can play n bask for the Asia Conference n attend the morning sessions by the world famous preachers, and at the same time spend some quality time with Joan, n possibly go for LAN gaming in between the morning and night sessions! Sweet!

Oh and last night went to have dinner with Joan, some wanton noodle shop at sunshine plaza, then went to watch a horror movie, REC. oh man, honestly i thought it was one of the scariest, suspenseful, thrilling zombie horror movies I've ever watched! these zombies are not slow and weak, they're fast and have super strength! And the last 15 minutes of the show was PURE TERROR!! i'm not going to spoil the ending for anyone who might be reading, but the ending was really damn scary and Joan almost pulled my arm off! Hahaha.. Even though I think its the first time I'm watching a Spanish film, and I did get a headache from the shakey camera style, the fear factor at the ending of the show is really amazing! I never thought I'd be this scared after watching The Ring (japanese version of course!) but this zombie movie is really creepy and scary! No doubt a different sort of scary when compared to the Ring, but still quite horrifying and hellish, esp the last part when they encounter IT!

One thing though, the part which is super unbelievable is the camera man running and still filming down everything in the midst of chaos and zombie chases! But I guess its still a fresh angle and something new for a zombie movie, so good effort. And I think the budget must have been super low, not much special effects (perhaps thats what made it realistic?) and all unknown actors.

Definitely worth the $15. Its been a long time since I've had a good scare! In fact, one of the cinema goers was so terrified, she vomitted after coming out of the cinema. Or maybe its from motion sickness of the moving camera. =P Haha.. Joan was complaining she's going to have nightmares, but seriously, once you're out of the cinema, back to reality, the fear just evaporates. Especially when you realise a lot of loop holes and errors in the movie. =P

Oh and the row of cool shops just opened opposite the cinema ticket booth! All the cool statues and collectibles, swords, guns, figurines, costumes, toys, computer games, movie-related stuff, etc. I seriously doubt I'll buy anything much from those shops, but still its nice to look at the cool stuff they have on display. The life-size 2 m tall Terminator robot cost $10,000!! I mean, if I had an extra $100,000 sitting in my bank, then maybe I might consider getting it, but seriously how many pple would spend that kind of money on a Terminator robot?? This isn't America. LOL!

oh how pple change when they grow up..

2008-11-14T17:08:00.002+08:00

interesting arguement on facebook between some pri sch friends.. can't cut n paste everything here, but its basically like this

DG - invites everyone to his place at orchard for a christmas party BBQ, said $30 per person, ask if everyone is ok with the idea

Me- i said i don't mind but $30 for BBQ per person is a little expensive, i mean if 15 pple turn up then there'll be $450, which is quite ridiculous for a BBQ right?

DG - got offended n ask me don't be so cheapskate, as if $30 is a lot of money to me

LS - told everyone that DG's party is not exclusive for pri sch friends, other pple r invited as well

J - then its not exclusive to us, not so keen liao

YY - if its not exclusive to us, won't we be intruding on another party, y not have our own event

DG - got offended n say everyone is unappreciative of his offer

everyone else in the discussion - tell him to relax, we're just talking things out n discussing, nobody is saying we don't appreciate his offer

DG - still offended, saying everyone is being so negative, its not healthy to continue the discussion

everyone else - relax lah don't get angry, blah blah..

DG - still offended.

Now doesn't it sound ridiculous? Obviously I felt like telling him how childish n petty he is, we're not saying his idea is bad or criticising his party, we're just saying what we would prefer. I thought oh man, this guy has become such an egotistic, petty person, cannot take criticism or comments from others. so annoying! i can just organise another gathering at my own place on the same day with no problems from the rest of the classmates even if they choose not to turn up, it doesn't bother me.

Isn't he missing the point? doing something to be appreciated by others, to show off his house n his grand party?

I don't really care about the place or is it in town or how grand it is or how nice the food is. whats most important is the fellowship, the friends, the pple you grew up with isn't it?

we can be eating at newton hawker center for all i care. the conversation will still be great, catching up on old times, sharing our lives n stuff.

Its not a time for egomaniacs to strut their stuff n show how "successful" they are in life, living life in the fast lane, with car, big gold chain n dress like some towkay! he needs some lessons in humility and the value of friendship. LOL!

This week has been such a lousy week..

2008-11-13T15:17:00.002+08:00

So pissed off.. Finally got my work done n sent out.. Whatever happens, I can only pray for the best and hope that everyone is happy, no more back and forth emails, end of the matter. i really don't want to make anymore changes to those documents, i'm so sick of looking at this matter already.

I'm going to sit back and read my book now, worked through dinner and lunch today, I think I deserve a break, let off some steam n cool off. my boss says my work is really bad, i'm not paying attention to details, etc. but that has always been my weakness. i'm the kind who like to tackle a problem headon, and leave the details to settle on their own.

i guess what pastor always says is right, attention to details are important for success. i screwed up this matter so badly because i overlooked so many details. sigh...

yup i'm so dead.

2008-11-12T16:14:00.002+08:00

hahaha, my boss is so gonna kill me when she finds out that i've been sending out agreements without letting her vet through first, but then again the client and the other side lawyers have already looked through it, and i've check with my other colleague. i hope its alright. then again, i won't be around if anything goes wrong or screws up, so i can't be bothered liao.

after christmas i'm going to start doing up my CV and start looking for a new place to work. i really cannot stand getting scolded or stoning around with nothing to do, its not helping me at all, i'm not learning through scolding, i'm not gaining anything now besides spending an insane amount of time on facebook and blogging. I suppose if I were the slack type, I won't mind staying, but i want to do something meaningful with my time, not sit here n rot.

perhaps i really made a big mistake coming to this firm, since so many partners n lawyers have already quit n joined other firms. i'm quite pissed honestly, i should've seen this coming sooner. i just want my bonus for doing all the work earlier, i want to get paid properly for the earlier projects i've done.

now its 4.30 pm, another 1.5 hours till 6 pm, and my boss still has no time to see me. i'm so screwed, i need to send out the documents by tonight. that means i have to stay late lor, no choice. not like my boss who can come n go whenever she wants, even if the whole team is working until 1 am (my poor colleagues worked till 3 am again last night but she went off at 7 pm).

oh n she's a christian too. with nice verses n posters on her room wall.

i'm so pissed..

2008-11-10T16:47:00.001+08:00

just got a scolding from my boss over some agreements that i did, i think i got almost an hour of scolding while in the middle of explaining what is it i wrote out. she just kept shouting question after question which took me a while to answer and i really feel like crap.

i mean, i wanted to ask her about this matter weeks ago, n it really is a matter of payment terms, i don't know what the heck is so difficult about that. I mean, if the contracting parties want it to be done that way, why can't it be done if its in black n white? there's nothing illegal about it, n i honestly didn't see anything wrong with it.

i still got other things to see her on, but she's in such a foul mood i don't think i'll see her on anything else today except those supplementals.

really quite tired n stoned out when she was scolding me, i wanted to ask her, is it my fault when i wanted to see u like 3 weeks ago but u kept shushing me off? how do i know if i'm drafting something correctly if i don't see a senior lawyer to check first?

i'm quite zonked out now, but i know i'll be damn pissed if i wasn't in zombie mode right now. but right now i just want to get some sleep. i'm reall sick of this job n my boss, i'm going to look for another job soon. I think probably next year, i'll quit this job n find another firm to work at. i really cannot take it anymore, i'm like wasting my time here. i don't learn anything, my work isn't appreciated, i feel like crap everyday getting scolded for this n that.. i'm a freaking newbie, not an expert.. i don't want to do this any longer.. i've got to find another job soon.

what a busy weekend!

2008-11-10T10:45:00.002+08:00

had a super busy n tiring weekend, i'm so exhuasted now i can't get through the day without dozing off man! i really need to find something to wake me up. i can't take anymore caffeine cos i'm allergic to it, n besides, i don't like hot coffee.

actually to be completely honest, i wanted to call in sick n sleep away the whole morning, the weather is so nice n cooling n rainy days are always perfect for sleeping in! i'm just so freaking tired i keep falling asleep at the com every 5 mins, its a struggle to stay awake! i have to resort to SMSing, emailing n biting my tongue n facebooking n blogging n going toilet or something, just to keep me awake enough to reach lunch time!!

anyway after fri cg, we had some ktv session, then went with william to TPY for supper, then sat morning woke up late for SF prac, but as usual, everyone was also late, i took a cab n it costs me like, $15 for the trip! ridiculously expensive, used to be only $10 plus i think.

after practicing crossing over for like half an hour or so, we went to astons for lunch, they got the orders a little wrong, as usual, the food was quite nice, but a little slow that day. rohan n christine's fish esp!

after that we took the LONGG ride home on bus 76 from marine parade to my house, took about 45 min i think, joan was a bit sick by the time we reached home! then prepared the birthday card n gift for mindice, then prepare for her party, then after makaning at the function room, we to vivocity to meet the rest of the SF pple to go sentosa for the gig at 9 pm.

oh man, we waiting so long for the gig! it started at about midnight, n we played the usual flightphesy n FHW, but due to the overly enthu audience, we played the space jam beats sequence, as well as hot summer, and ended with crazy army. quite fun n energetic through out e performance, a bit funny as well, SF pple blinded by the smoke n lights n colliding into each other. haha!

we played for a full 20+ mins, with hot summer, nana, crazy army, etc, everything except budm! the crowd was half drunk probably, but super responsive n excited, i think i heard a comment that we were even better than the fireworks. haha. i think overall it was a great performance, thank God i remembered the crazy army parts, mostly at least! smoked my way through some parts before looking at what Ian was playing to remember what to play! hahaha..

after that we went to Mac at harbour front for supper n debriefing, until about 3 am before we finally left. got paid on the spot, so yeah, thank God for the blessing, which i in turn was able to bless Joan w money for food n transport.

sunday had a quarrel w Joan over several issues on the way to church, i was pretty grumpy cos she was late n there was a miscom, n we ended up reaching expo close to 11, just before the announcements. but it was worth the trip rushing for service, Ed silvoso was really the kind of preacher businessman that i like to listen to, a totally marketplace, cultural mandate kind of message, encouraging, inspiring n interesting. took a bit of time to get used to his super thick accent, but i enjoyed service a lot. the 4 levels of christian living in the marketplace, quite sad, i think i'm currently at the bottom rung of the 4 levels! got to break thru in this..

went for lunch w some SF guys at changi airport n then went for some dog show before going for asia conf prac at 4 pm. oh man, we played games n chatted n slacked before we could finally practice at 8 pm! we waited 4 hours just for a 15 min practice. i think mariah was so pissed off she left before we even went up to stage to practice. =p honestly, i felt it was quite a waste of time also, but the fellowshipping was great, so no complaints there. haha.

had dinner with joan at BK at city hall, where we talked about several issues.. i guess we're still quite different in the way we see things n we need to communicate more, rather than jumping to conclusions. but its good, at the end of the day, we were the loving couple again. haha! by the time i reach home n took a bath, it was almost midnight.. time really flies so fast on a weekend n drags so painfully slowly on weekdays, esp monday morning!

i want to take my leave n just chill out n relax for the asia conf weekend!! spend some quality time with Joan, catch up with non-church friends, etc. or just "nua" away, slack n watch tv n laze around at home, or chil out at some coffee place, sipping a drink n relaxing. the fast pace of life is really getting to me.. need to slow down. be still n know that He is God, no wonder even God has to command us to stop all the activities once in a while, be quiet n still, n know Him better.

What if?

2008-11-06T17:55:00.003+08:00

What if Earth in the year 2008 was simply part of the Imperium of Mankind but we didn't know it yet, until one day the tyranides show up and we're helpless in defending ourselves until the appearance of the majestic, powerful, god-like SPACE MARINES?

---

Up in a satellite floating over the earth, all seems peaceful, except that this is a spy satellite of the US, spying on Russia.

"Report in, Sergeant Roy." A static-filled voice came from the transmitter.

"All's quiet down here, nothing to report. Same old for the past 5 months.. Sir, you sure we aren't just wasting tax dollars on this hunk o junk?" Sergeant Roy joked with his superior.

"Just do your job and I'll do mine, over and out."

Sergeant Roy relaxed in his seat. Half a year of space duty didn't seem as exciting as he thought it would be. Initially he was thrilled at the chance of a trip to outer space, to see the world from heaven and literally look down upon humanity. The earth looked so small and peaceful from up in space. But after a few months, the novelty wore off, and it became just another day on the job for him. A fellow astronaut joined him with a cup of decaff.

"Roy, have you noticed the interference with the sonar equipment? We're getting weird signals from here." 2nd Lieutanant Herbett pointed to the screen.

Roy just snorted and replied, "But that's coming from the other side of where we're supposed to be looking at sir. Russia's down there, Mars is at our 6, and where you're pointing is just open space."

At that moment the screens flickered again and the interference kept occuring. This time, it got both personnel worried. When communications are disrupted, it could mean someone or something was jamming their frequency. Someone knew they were spying on Russia!

"Better get a message back to station control Roy!" Herbett began checking the other scanners and various switches. "And activate the squad to be on standby for evac!" One can never be too careful, he thought to himself. He was soon proven right.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, a giant cluster of objects appeared on the scanner! "Sir, what the heck are those things? They've got to be hundreds of miles away but there's nothing out there!" Roy exclaimed while trying to send a message to station control on earth.

"I don't know.. but I think we'll find out soon enough. They're approaching us at incredible speed!" Herbett seemed to pale as he stared at the screen. "Quick we've got to warn control!"

"I can't get anything sir! Its just static.. and that awful sound!" Roy finally began to panic.

Herbett pressed the emergency evacuation button, and the rest of the crew, some waken from their slumber, hurriedly made their way to the evacuation shuttle. "We'll keep trying Roy, let's hope the Chinese aren't listening to all this.. no wait! transmit to all satellites in range! We've got to get the message across before.."

It was too late. They never knew what hit them as a blast of bio-energy hit the satellite and blew them into pieces.

The huge bio-ship lumbered onward, its escorts at its side and front, with thousands of smaller bio-ships protecting it from all flanks. Even then its mission was simple - knock out all satellites and communication. The larger ships had even yet to pass through the warp.

---

"Yes, yes I'll send you those documents by tonight!" Grifter almost yelled at his client on the phone. It was 6.30 pm on a Thursday evening on 6 November 2008, and here he was, stuck in office working when he had plans to go out with his girlfriend Joan.

He sighed and looked at the clock again. Sometimes he almost wished he had chosen a different career path, one that didn't require him to stay back almost everyday, with demanding clients and bosses who hounded him the moment he stepped into the office at 9 am every morning.

Oh well, at least his life wasn't as bad as his colleagues, who were having a shouting match with other lawyers over the phone, having worked until 3 a.m. consecutively for the past week. How can you complain when your colleagues are having a worse time than him? But still, he felt so dissatisfied, no doubt the pay was good, but then again, should he be working purely for the sake of money?

He got another call and he picked up the phone in annoyance. "Yes, Grifter speaking, how can I help you?"

"Dude, you gotta catch the news! Right now!" James Boon, his long-time friend sounded excited for some reason.

"Look, I've got no time for this right.." "Aliens are attacking the U.S.!!"

"Wha..?" Grifter clicked on the internet to find the latest news..

"Haha! You actually believed that load of crap! Jeez! Hahaha..." James Boon bowled over in laughter. "Listen man, we're thinking of going over to the shooting range tonight, we'll be there until about 11 p.m. join us if you can alright? Ciao!"

Grifter sighed. He was good with the bow and arrow, won several competitions. Even had a personalised cross bow and long bow, displayed prominently at his home. He attempted to take up fencing and swordplay, but decided that he preferred shooting projectiles at distant targets. He had his own paintball gun, and even a rifle which shoots out rubber bullets. Illegal no doubt, but it wouldn't kill a person unless you shot him in the eye at point blank range. But still, it packed enough punch to shoot through wooden planks, and would tear muscle tissue if fired too close to a person. The things that rich boys play with.

But he had his job to do. So back to the keyboard, he typed away again, thinking of dinner as his stomach growled.

---

"Sir, satellite R43 hasn't reported in today sir. All attempts to reach them in the last 2 hours have failed."

Major Sternly sighed. An imposing figure, his light grey moustache around his muscular jawline giving him his nickname "Stern". He bet that Roy must be asleep or goofing off somewhere again!

"And sir.. we just received a message from the Chinese. Said their satellite picked up a message from R43 two days ago. They demand to know what a U.S. satellite is doing in their space and what does the message mean."

Sternly raised his eyebrows and felt the first sign of trouble. "Let me hear the message! Those buffoons better have a damn good reason for broadcasting it!!"

---

In a coal mine somewhere in Central America, workers were calling it a day as the sun set.

Suddenly there was a rumbling sound from the tunnel, and young Edwardo turned around to look. "Hey whats that? Sounds like someone's still back there!" he motioned to his buddy Holly.

Holly had a pretty hot bod for someone who worked in a mine. If you didn't mind her large biceps, that is. She was carrying an oxy-acelyn torch and removed her mask. "Well go tell em to get their butts out! This tunnel is ready to blow in half an hour!"

US election results - Obama has won!

2008-11-05T17:59:00.002+08:00

Most of my friends and incidentally most Singaporeans favour Obama over Mccain, and in the US election results, America voted for Obama as well. Enuff said! Cool young black dude vs old balding grumpy white dude, the answer was pretty damn obvious. Haha!

I hope he comes up with some sort of New Deal like FDR to take US and the world out of this financial crisis.. When the economy is down, everyone's in a bad mood, everyday you see gloomy faces, everyone knows Christmas isn't gonna be really joyous this year.

To be completely honestly, I think its really a bad time for me too. not cos of the finances, but becos of other reasons. work related mostly. sigh.

Busy weekend, nearing the end of 2008!

2008-11-03T09:42:00.002+08:00

Dear God,

Its been quite a while since I've written to You here on my blog, and I hope You're still happy with what I'm doing most of the time.

Building fund pledging weekend is over. I know the amount I gave wasn't really by revelation, the amount which I thought You wanted me to give was way way way over my current earning capacity, so I don't think I am able to fulfil that amount. I would have to empty my savings totally to do that, and now that I'm saving for a house, I don't think thats a very wise decision. Nonetheless, I've definitely pledged more than last year, a lot more. I pray that You help me to keep strictly to my budget to fulfil the building fund quickly and totally.

God, right now, honestly, I'm very bothered about Joan's situation. I've never seen her so worried and stressed in the past few years I've known her. I pray that we're able to come out with a solution for her financial problems, that You are able to show her that You're a God who provides, never too late, never too early, but just in time. Somehow, I know that You will provide a way out for her, and strengthen her faith in You once again. I don't like it when she's upset or unhappy, as it really affects me as well.

God I also want to pray for my job, I wrote on the offering envelope yesterday, for clearer direction in my job. Honestly, I should've listened to my gut feeling n go into litigation n try it out, and move into corporate only after i realise litigation isn't my forte, but now i will never know becos i didn't dare to try, n simply choose the path that most of my friends took, being the "safer" choice. I sort of regret it now, but i can't do anything about it since the choice has already been made, i've just got to learn to live with it and adjust myself to it.

Happy birthday to Sharlyn, Rachel, Lydia and Mindice (3 of them on 8 November!) and I must say, everyweek there's a SF person celebrating birthday n its getting rather expensive to keep buying presents for birthdays! Hehz.. its kind of weird, usually people don't celebrate their birthdays, but this year seems like almost everyone close to Joan n I are having some party or celebration. its fun of course, but draining on the wallet too. =p Nevertheless, I believe in blessing people who have been a blessing in my life, especially the friends that God has sent to me to help me and make life more meaningful to me.

God, i'm beginning to wonder. is this it? Working n working n slogging it out for the next 20 over years of my life? Am I able to retire at 50? If my job brings me little job satisfaction, isn't it a clear indication that i'm not walking in Your will for me? But what else can I do? At least until I finish paying off the house, I don't feel the security in any other job that I'm not well equipped to do.

Honestly, I really want Boon's vision to come to pass, about the 3-in-1 music venue, the music school, jamming studio, music shop and music cafe. And from the past 3-4 years of following Boon, i realise that he really brings his dreams into reality, n doesn't just talk the talk, he actually does the job through prayer and sheer hard work n determination! He doesn't care what others think, or if the task seems impossible, as long as he believes in the vision from God, the fulfilment of the cultural mandate, and with the support of pastor Kong n the music team, he is ready to go for it all the way. I really want to be a part of the 3-in-1 music venue, hopefully as one of the board members of the company that he may set up, and I'll quit my lawyer job the moment the music company breaks even. Not that I don't have enough faith in the sustainability, but simple economics show that it takes a while to break even. probably a year or longer? Hopefully i won't have to be a lawyer all my life, i don't wish to practice law for so long, its merely to pay for our house n store up my savings for the future. I really hope to quit practice in about 15 years time, after paying up for the flat n having a comfortable amount of a few hundred grand in the bank.

God, another dream which I want to see fulfilled is the Strikeforce show at the IR! i mean in las vegas they have those weekly shows n performances to bring in the tourists as well as the casinos, a family entertainment centre, which doesn't have to focus on gambling all the time. I really believe the Strikeforce can do it. have a 1.5 hour show on our own, with fantastic set ups, innovative sequences, n something so unique that sets us apart from the other drumming groups in Singapore, and in fact, even the world. I envision the show to be a mix of hippickles, stomp, blackfire percussion, marching band, slick drumming skills, entertaining gimmicks, ultimate drum machines, lots of jumping yelling energetic dances, etc. we can do half hour shows for F1 and Banthai, why not a show at the same venue, instead of running from place to place, the audiences comes to see us?

If that day comes, or rather WHEN that day comes, I want to be a part of it. maybe not even a player, but background crew, director, cheorographer, etc. marketplace ministry? it doesn't get any better than this! God, that's one of the few things that I actually look forward to in life.

I pray that I'll be able to fulfil those dreams, that You continue to give me direction and inspiration for my life. If not, i'll probably live just a mediocre life, of an average lawyer, earning quite a bit, living life comfortably, but not really doing anything great for God. the fact is, that sounds scarily good to me now, to sort of "settle down" and drop into a comfortable pace, staying in the comfort zone, enjoing life n its little pleasures. But i know that is not Your will for me, I still have yet to find that opening in politics, I still have yet to fulfil that dream of being a writer of fiction and stories.

I guess i'll have to start somewhere if I wanna become a writer, see if pple like my works, or am i simply writing for the sake of self-entertainment? of cos if pple like it, there's a way for what i like to do to become profitable, of cos i'll do it.

In conclusion, please bless my relationship with Joan, n my family members. I'm really so fortunate to have a great family who loves me n blesses me, n a wonderful girlfriend who simply adores me n loves me so much, i'm so thankful to You for sending her into my life. I will try to be a better Christian for You, to really change my bad characteristics and habits, and focus on Your Word for me.

In Jesus name,
Amen.

the end of an era?

2008-10-29T11:36:00.002+08:00

last night Boon had a meeting with various members of the Strikeforce to pass the motion (hahaha) that.. hehz, well, i'll keep it under wraps for now. but basically things won't quite be the same, which came as something as a shock to most of us. anyway most of us were in agreement with Boon's proposal, for a variety of reasons. but some interesting comments..

Perception of the Strikeforce from the viewpoint of church members hasn't been too positive. Somehow many pple still have the idea that ministry means serving on sat or sun in some part of the church, catering to the needs of the church, and doing "church" things. usher, children's church worker, musician, choir member, tv crew, sound crew, attributes, etc.. and they wonder why strikeforce has practice every sunday at riverwalk, but we never perform in church. they ask me, actually what is strikeforce all about, what do you do? how can a group that performs outside of church be considered ministry? how can you be paid? how do you know you're not doing it for the money and not for God? questions from church pple and even non-church pple.

which brings me back to the cultural mandate. to penetrate the marketplace, to be salt and light of the world.

is a Christian businessman who runs a sucessful big company considered as serving in a ministry? is he serving God when he's at his office or at a meeting or having agolf game with clients?

ministry is ministering to others, being a servant, a worker, so that others may enjoy your service and be ministered to. like what pastor kong always says, a Minister is a civil servant, they are there to serve us, not their own needs.

and yet they are paid hundreds of thousands for their service. they justify the salary for good results.

then pple will say ministry should be done out of love for God and not materialistic gains, you should serve without any gains.

to these pple, i ask them, then why not go an quit your job n work full time in church for zero salary? is that what ministry really is? serving at the expense of yourself for the benefit of others?

i think pple don't really understand how deep and wide the cultural mandate goes. they should all go n read Peter Wagner's book, the church in the workplace. by "they", i mean especially cell group leaders.

even yujie n rosa (two very spiritually mature close friends of mine who are business pple, have led or helped cell groups, led ministries, and worked with Pst Tan and other ZS closely before) have comments on the standard of cell group leaders now. but that's beside the point n for another blog entry.

the marketplace ministry simply means this: by excelling in whatever you're doing that's outside of the church and blessing others with your gifts, talents and abilities, you are glorifying God and serving His will, by impacting the people around you in a godly manner.

you're NOT out there to declare you're a christian first, n then try to find ways to hook them to come to church or seduce or force them to attend bible study or cell group or church service. pastor kong said himself, when we help pple, its with no strings attached, no ulterior motive to convert them or force God down their throat.

if u excel in your job n your family n whatever you do, pple will naturally be drawn to you and then you tell them the secret of your success, God!

4 pm on a friday n my colleagues have work overload.. poor chaps.

2008-10-24T16:08:00.002+08:00

some clients are really unreasonable. monday is deepavali, a public holiday, and they want to sign an agreement on monday, and will only be sending out the agreement this evening! its ridiculous, so they expect us to work over the weekend, and come back on monday with comments on the agreement, n then to witness the signing of the documents. i mean, don't these pple have a life?? even if they don't have the holiday (as they're in another country) they can at least try to understand that we're having a public holiday in singapore, isn't it? blood china pple can be damn unreasonable..

i mean, not like i'm affected, thank God. in fact i'm so free today I was on facebook n youtube n hotmail n now i'm blogging trying to kill some time until 6 pm when i go off. i mean, its really unbelievable for some pple to demand n expect u to work overtime like that. i hope my clients or the pple i deal with aren't so anal n crazy.. hongyee get to escape cos he's going back to KL to celebrate his birthday, Ruby is going to hongkong, so only my boss n shuhon n the secretary coming back during the weekend..

but on a seperate note, i really am sleeping from quite a full lunch, i can't see my boss becos she's so freaking busy running from meeting room to printer to her room, i think they're having a meeting now, along with a conf call. i think its quite ridiculous earlier, there were like 6 of them cramped into a small room having a conf call when they could've just moved to the meeting room.

anyway my firm is gonna have some renovation as the litigation department is coming over from the other side. good thing is, we don't have to move to club street. bad thing is, the corridor might get smokey, knowing the smoking habits of the litigators. plus there are going to be more pple walking up n down the corridor, means less privacy n harder for me to slack off liao. haha! but at least i won't have to change mrt at raffles to tanjong pagar and wake up 15-20 min earlier anymore.

weather has been really shoik for sleeping recently, thats why i woke up at 8.40 am this morning, instead of my usual 7.30 am! i overslept for an hour n was late for work, reached office only at 9.30 am ,but thankfully boss was so busy i don't think she noticed. =P or at least i hope she didn't notice. she's in a really foul mood now, no doubt from the arguements going on in the meeting, plus the fact that she'll have to come back to work during the weekends. puikwan n i don't dare to look for her to vet our documents, when she is in a mood like that! this sucks big time, that means i can't do anything the whole day until i clear my stuff with her.

oh well, now its already almost 5 pm, so in about 1 hours' time i'm packing my stuff n waltzing out of here.. to go for cell group. sigh. if not for the obligation, i wouoldn't go liao. more n more i find it quite a waste of time, time which i can spend enjoying myself with friends, clubbing, or doing more normal things which pple my age does. i suppose the fellowship is supposed to help, but i'm not exactly close to the CG pple either, aside from Qingni n Soohuei. complaining isn't gonna help of course, n changing cell group doesn't help either, so I'm just going to see how it goes. its like, i'm losing all interest in the typical CHC lifestyle. not that i'm losing interest in God, I still pray n seek Him n i do enjoy biblical theories n bible study which intrigues the mind (and not some repetition of principles which i've already been taught), but there's just so much reluctance to participate in CG stuff. its like, how do i put it nicely, an obligation n no longer a joy. well they always preach discipline, forcing yourself to do things because you know its good for your spirit, i can't remember the exact steps, but i think its decision=>duty=>discipline=>delight, or something like that.

i know i'm making the right choice to continue to struggle to go for cell group n bible study, but having no motivation isn't gonna help me struggle for very long.

Long weekend is coming soon!

2008-10-23T09:43:00.002+08:00

Watched L - change the world last night with Joan, after having dinner with Mikki and Jazz. Jazz is some magician guy who's a little bit weird, but I guess is a nice guy. Haven't seen Mikki since my birthday dinner, and oh man, she hasn't aged a day since 2004 when we were in the same cell group! still the ever youthful and cute Mikki with that cheeky smile, no wonder so many guys chase her lah. heard the latest one is called Andy n he's a guitarist in the zoneband or something. *shrug* don't think Mikki's interested in anyone at the moment though.

oh yes, attending a meeting on behalf of my boss cos she had to look after her son who was sick, n it was quite scary attending a AGM without my boss, n its quite boring as well, becos apart from the 2-3 pple in the company which i know, the other members attending the meeting are all unknown to me, n being in a totally different industry, i can't see how i can talk to them. anyway expected it to end at 5, but since it started 15 min later, it ended close to 5.30 instead, but still to be able to get out of the office, is really a refreshing experience. n when I met joan to buy my umbrella n return my book, just so happened we bumped into Mikki n Jazz n had dinner with them at KFC.

thank God for good friends like Mikki, who never ceases to put a smile on my face, though she may be 6 years younger than me, but i still click with her better than many of my peers.

had a slight arguement with Joan over some issue n i realise i need to learn how to see the whole picture before i start to voice my opinion, n often i jump to conclusions when she doesn't tell me all the details. we're quite different, i'm always surging ahead, quick thinking, fast pace of life, whereas she's more relaxed, take things slowly, more concern about relationship than situation. so learning to compromise is really an important skill in a relationship, something i've not quite mastered yet. haha.

A Merchant's Diary (fiction from Warhammer 40k)

2008-10-21T15:07:00.002+08:00

I wish I had never stepped foot on the Tau vessel this morning to negotiate the trade deal.

True, it was worth about 3 billion dollars, but when my life's on the line, hey, I'm out the door before you can begin to say "the Emperor protects".

But of course, things didn't turn out the way I expect today. As usual. Good thing I had that funny feeling when I was getting dressed this morning, and that frak jacket under my tunic probably saved my life at least once today. Not to mention my laspistol, which was given as a gift from that old friend of mine Demento Cain, a son of the famous hero of the Imperium, Commissar Ciaphas Cain. He said that this was a blessed laspistol which had shot insane Chaos worshippers, maurading orks, scavenging tyranide creatures and even a daemon from the Warp. Perhaps it was this pistol that really saved my life today, though I doubt such a small arm would have mattered in the scale of things.

Let me start at the beginning, I'm getting ahead of myself once again.

My partners and I were negotiating a deal with a Tau trader over a couple thousand barrels worth of amasec, as it seemed like our alien friends had developed a taste for fine alcohol. Though few humans would dare to trade with aliens and their unknown intentions (not to say that human merchants were any less scheming and would rob you blind the moment you let down your guard), I found this Tau merchant to be exceptionally trustworthy. We had brokered several deals before, and he or rather it, had never renegaded on its promises to deliver payment and goods as according to the contracts. M'kdash was its name, though I could never pronounce it properly, settling for a easier nickname "Dash" for it (which it appeared to like, though I never knew why).

So there we were, a group of human and Tau merchants, merrily doing business aboard the Tau vessel (we were getting quite a bargain, a ship load of new machinery and technology for a couple barrels of my cheapest wine which of course the Tau, with all their intelligence and technology, failed to detect) when I received a message from my aide, a former members of the Imperial Guard's ghost squad, whom I trusted to handle rocky situations.

I almost choked on my drink when I read the words on the data slate, and had I reacted a minute later, I wouldn't be in this miserable cell on board a space marine battle cruiser writing this down. I'd probably be fuming and dead, on my way to the Warp to atone for my misdeeds and other miscellaneous smuggling, killing and criminal activities.

Effects of music, speech, thoughts on water crystals.. psuedo-science or facts?

2008-10-20T10:56:00.002+08:00

Sometimes I think people are really too easily awed.

Did some research on Dr Emoto's experiments on water crystals, and found that they're generally rejected by scientists as being "psuedo-science" for lack of controls, improper procedures, varying results, and various other reasons.

But then again, even if it isn't factually-proven science, his theory does seem to explain a lot of human behaviour, assuming that the bulk of a human being is made up of water.

If music and words influence the shape and creation of water crystals, how much would music and words shape and influence carbon-based cells?

Although his research doesn't come out with any detailed scientific thesis or results that can be 100% repeated in any situation, it does give any person food for thought.

The Bible says, life and death is in the power of words. As a man thinks, so is he. believe and confess, and you will have whatever you pray for.

not so bad.

2008-10-17T15:12:00.003+08:00

things aren't as bad as i imagined them to be. thank God for that.

of cos, not everything is rosy n not everything's good n well with the world, but at least i can make an effort to deal with the issues n not just bitch about it.

had lunch with eunice ding today. honestly, felt a little weird. i think she felt it too at the beginning. we were so close like siblings a few years ago, but today at lunch it feels like we're almost strangers. isn't that sad? its like, we had a million things to say to each other but at the same time we conversed about casual topics first rather than jumping into the issues that we really wanted to talk about.. like her job, how bad they treat the employees, her struggles with her boyfriend, my arguements n differences with joan n some church pple, my job dissatisfaction, etc.. we did manage to get to talking more freely but only while drinking coffee at starbucks did we really open up to each other.

it was good, i really enjoyed catching up w her, n we both really wanted to make this lunch happen. it has been a good 3-4 months since i last met her.

but why was there this.. invisible wall between us? like we're afraid to talk to each other like we used to when we were both helpers in the cell group, when we both loved Jesus n served Him with all our heart. like we're afraid to admit to each other that now, we're no longer living the same life for Him. that we're struggling a little in our walk with God, we're struggling with our job, our relationships with our other half, n basically life got tougher.

after lunch at the jap place (thanks to Eunice for the belated birthday treat!) we hadn't really conversed about the main issues yet? it was more like reporting on what happened in the past few months, cordial n formal. i don't understand what made us talk like that. perhaps it was meeting at raffles place, in the middle of a working day, dressed in business attire?

but at starbucks, we finally began to talk about the issues that mattered. she told me something which i was shocked, n which she herself was badly shocked when she found out, something not so nice about mr YJ. sigh, i must say i am disappointed in him. i always thought he was better than that, that he wouldn't conform n give in to wordly practices. but anyway, it was weird, i was telling her how i made Joan upset n how blessed i am to have her although we're really different in some areas, n eunice was like telling me she loves YJ to bits but she isn't sure if he's the one she's gonna marry. fairy tales differ from reality after all. nevertheless, we managed to crack a few jokes n laugh, n that broke the ice, enabling us to really communicate like siblings once again.

but we were talking about different our lives are now compared to the past, n she actually said i now have a lot of pride, n actually she did too. thats why working adults lose their passion for God, become arrogant n unspiritual. some pride is good, self-confidence is necessary to succeed in the working world, but pride of life is wat makes us distance ourselves from God.

we had a 1.5 hour lunch break n were reluctant to get back to work, but well, work is work. i must catch up more with her, before i move to the new place, which is like damn far away from her.

i'm a mess now..

2008-10-16T00:51:00.002+08:00

who i am hates who i've been? more like who i've been hates who i am now..

after a few days of non-stop quarrelling n arguements.. what do u expect me to say or do?

i'm tired, freaking sick n tired, physically, mentally, spiritually.

bet u didn't see this coming, that i'm not mr nice guy all the time, i've got a limit, i've got a temper, i've got some bad skeletons in the closets. so what? who doesn't?

just leave me the frak alone if u wanna preach to me, then go find someone who's willing to listen n give a damn. i'm not a naive little kid who listens to everything that everyone says to me anymore, i've got my own life n i make my own decisions, if u think u're so much wiser n spiritual than me, then i've two words for you - UP YOURS.

every job is tough, is that all u can say when i'm under stress? haha.

yeah well but not every job makes u a hated personality even before u have a chance to say a word. sure the money's good, but at what cost?

i've seen the true colours of humans, they're just out to make use of you, or they're out to backstab u the moment they see the weakness.

even christians see the world through tainted lenses. everyone has a prejudice. what equality n fairness? what righteousness n partialness? PLEASE.

i'm here by the ocean waiting for proof that there's sunsets and silhouet dreams..
my sandcastles fall like the ashes of cigarettes.. is everyone here make believe..
this deafening silence means nothing to noone but me.

time seems to fly past on weekends! really it does!

2008-10-13T10:54:00.002+08:00

well what an eventful weekend! once again, had no time to really rest n relax n just slack at home, was busy the whole weekend from friday night till sunday night, n once again after meeting with rosa, she posed some serious questions that i've yet to find the answer for.

friday night, spent the whole day doing some proof reading at the printer's office, was quite enjoyable talking with the clients n working with them for the whole afternoon. lunch was provided by the printer, very hospitable n nice woman. chicken rice with 3 side dishes, was really quite full after that! anyway i'm glad that the clients r quite nice pple who r down to earth. quite sad that their rights issue is launched at the wrong time. =P

anyway met qingni or Ashley's new boyfriend at holland village on fri night after cg, n oh man, was quite funny cos her friend tried to hit on me when she heard i was a lawyer! also, qingni's boyfriend, Raymond or something, he speaks with ang moh slang n seems like a nice guy, but joan thinks he's a bit fake or trying too hard to be nice in front of his girlfriend! haha.. later some drunk guy came n sat at our table, thank God we were already about to leave. crazy fellow, just came to our table n asked for a drink.

sat was spent shopping with joan, then we went to perform for the MINDS school for mentally disabled kids. was quite a funny gig was well, irenus while doing tag team crashed into darryl TWICE n cut her lip, n they both stoned there for a few seconds after the crash. haha. only 8 pple played, it was tight, but FHW was a bit soft, only Joan played support w tom. after that we unloaded the stuff for MTT from studio n wanted to get some cake frm Obolo. Irenus said "oh, bo loh!! (means no more in dialect!)" super lame! hahah..

sun morning Joan n i were both a little sick, runny nose n headache, so we were late for service, but not bad lah, can sit behind sound console, quite good seats. Pastor preached about the recession n being proactive to make things work out for us, even in bad times like this.

after svc, went for MTT where we did some video shoot for the vietnam client, n then learned chow kiat's new sequence. haha. celebrated drew's birthday in style also, with break dancing n stuff, it was really fun n enjoyable!

woke up at 7 am to rush to work today to lodge the OIS, now feeling a little sleepy n tired, can't wait to go home n sleep, but tonight got to celebrate yishan's birthday at botak jones at braddell first, i'll prob leave by 9.30 pm latest. wanna get some personal time to think things over n pray!

issues like when to ROM, when to change job, how to improve on my working style, the HDB loans for the house, etc etc.. like 101 things to do list which doesn't grow shorter ever, only longer! haiz.. =P

Playing the guitar n piano after a loooonnnnnnngg time.

2008-10-08T09:11:00.002+08:00

last night i reached home rather early after dinner with my colleagues, i think about 10 pm or so. had some free time, so i went to play a bit of piano n try to play a mayday parade song, 3 cheers for 5 years, it was in B, so i transposed it to C so its easier to play. haha! then played a bit of guitar, but i'm not as fast as i used to be, can't get the strumming pattern right for certain songs too. gotta practice more liao, for that gig on 8 November. live band with my bro n his friends! not sure what songs they're playing yet, but just gonna hone my skills these few weeks first.

oh yeah, i'm so excited at getting my mayday parade CD on sunday! haha! maybe i'm a little too old to be listening to punk emo music, but who cares, i like the raw energy n the cracking emotional singing, simple lyrics n harmonised singing.

a long celebration over the weekend!

2008-10-07T09:51:00.002+08:00

Thank God for a really enjoyable birthday weekend! I don't think I've had this many celebrations ever! Hahaha.. dunno why pple tend to tone down their celebrations when they get "older", i believe u should have bigger n better celebrations each year, i mean, don't u go from glory to glory in everything? haha.. its biblical to have celebrations man, God Himself had so many celebrations in the bible! grinz

Wed - dinner at waffle town with ex-cg members (see earlier post)

Sat - dinner at Jade restaurant with family, aunt, cousins, then went to ben & jerry at dampsey road, totally cosy n relaxing atmosphere w excellent icecream. funny thing happened, my uncle n auntie wanted to surprise me n went down to chinatown ktv (which was cancelled but we didn't inform them cos we didn't know they were coming!) but in the end realise we weren't there n we went to drop off Stevie at their house n met them there instead. haha.. miscom again. but i did get a couple of angbaos, so yeah! had my 2nd birthday cake (mango)

Sun (actual birthday!) - celebrated bdae with cell group after svc, went for MTT where Boon gave me the SF birthday "samba" treatment with a super long scary drum solo, n then gave a treat to some of the SF pple, more than expected turned up (i think there were about close to 30 pple who turned up when i invited like 16? hahaha..) but still it was alright, didn't burn too big a hole in my pocket. haha. thanks to Robin for covering the drinks! received a few presents, pretty touched n glad for them, but i really really loved the card, as simple as it was. i guess to me presents don't mean as much as words from a person's heart. hehz. after dinner went jalan jalan w a few other SF pple (nic, liting, rohan, christine, millie, ian, joan n myself) at city link n marina square, and had icecream for dessert again! haha met melissa there too. cookie n cream mudpie, really good. totally enjoyed myself with the SF pple on sunday evening. oh yeah, had my 3rd birthday cake! mango as well, chosen by the SF girls. haha.

Mon (6 October) - special day with Joan. went to work in morning but it was ok lah, only less than 2 hours n my boss said i only need to apply half day for the afternoon off so yeah! visited the ZOO! had mac lunch n took like a hundred pictures there, though most were of the animals n joan! haha.. had kfc for tea n Thai express for dinner, then watched a movie before sending Joan home. still have not received my present from her cos she said its taking a long time to prepare! hahaha.. its ok, Joan is the best present i can ever ask for already, thank You Lord! oh yeah, we got tickets for night safari as well since its only $17 package with zoo entry.

to all those who gave me presents: thank you guys so much, i really didn't expect to get so many presents this year, i really appreciate the thought n effort in getting it!

to all those who attended my birthday celebrations: thanks for being a part of my 26th birthday, and many more to come!

to God: thank You for always being with me throughout the years, for Your presence n joy in my life, for the people you've brought into my life, and for the things yet to come!

Fashion and God - whats the link?

2008-10-05T01:20:00.002+08:00

Yeah i know its totally weird to blog about something like that on 5 October 2008, at 1.30 am in the morning, when i should be happy about celebrating my birthday with my family n friends.

and of cos, i had a great time watching movie and having supper with Joan, Melisa, Millie n Ian, and slept until 12 noon before going on a shopping spree with Joan, she gave me $200 credit to buy whatever i like and we spent 2 hours walking around city link and marina square, and eventally bought 2 shirts from Clubmarc, 1 t-shirt from Zara and 1 pair of shoes from some shoe shop i don't even know the brand, but i like the design. then went to Jade room restaurant for dinner with my family n cousin Stevie, supposed to go KTV after that but cancelled cos another 2 cousins couldn't make it (honestly i wasn't annoyed cos i think KTV so often is a little bit boring, hahaha!) so we went to Ben & Jerry at Dampsey road instead, to enjoy ice cream, apple pie, nachos and the live band, actually it was a singer with a guitar, micheal wong or something, and he was pretty good! sounds almost like Jason Mraz, for a local singer i think thats amazing. had a great time with my family n friends, thank God for such wonderful loving people in my life.

Yet, i still need to blog about something that has been at the back of my mind since friday's cell group msg. and oh yes, i'm going to offend pple with this post, but i've discussed the whole issue with Joan for an hour or so today, and with my cousin from FCBC as well (he's leading a small group of youths and is part of TOUCH community services).

Its basically about the sudden talk about fashion during cell group. and its not chit-chat fellowship kind of talk, its a cell group discussion n forms part of the sermon. of cos, a minor part of the sermon, and Kenneth did share soemthing that really impacted me as well, the reversal of the worldly 3 Gs : gold, glory and girls, into the Christian lifestyle 3 Gs : God, goals and growth.

but anyway it was the talk and comments on fashion that really irked me. 3 questions:

1. what kind of fashion impresses you
2. what do you consider common and mediocre
3. what kind of fashion is distasteful

does this sound like part of a sermon? alright, given the benefit of the doubt, it can be about wearing your best for church, dressing up n looking sharp for God, so we not only give him the best worship n offering during service, we look our best for Him as well. sounds pretty much the usual doctrine of a spirit of excellence.

but when comments start coming about how "i really hate girls who wear baggy jeans" or "guys should not wear berms to church" or "i can't stand girls who wear ear rings big enough to put a parrot on" or "an example of mediocre dressing? our whole cell group" or even the ultimate "example of common and mediocre fashion - points at cell group leader!" the criticism flys, the pple who think they know fashion like they are the fashion police, "guys must always gell their hair" or "girls always look better with makeup" or many other statements that were made that honestly i didn't agree with, or even if i agreed with, felt that it has nothing to do with God.

the rationale behind the sermon is that service 4 pple are dressing sloppily to service, our leaders want to address the issue n suggest that we dress better, buy nicer clothes and listen to other pple's opinions on what is appropriate and what is not.

since when did your outward appearance become more important than your inward attitude toward God?

for that matter, since when did Ed Hardy and Skin become associated with cell group leaders, or wannabe leaders in the church?

yes, Sun brought that brand into SIngapore becos she liked it n those designs are one of its kind in singapore, so that is a good thing. bringing creativity and diversity into singapore fashion, excellent!

but why does every city harvest CGL have a longing to own a Ed Hardy or Skin apparel? or even better, as another friend of mine puts it so aptly, the "welcome to the Ed Hardy club" present when a new cell group leader is appointed.

but isn't fashion a matter of personal preference n taste?

i like the wear flowery n "ah beng" kind of clothes which no doubt some will find distasteful. do i need to please them in order to bring glory to God in my dressing? do i need to spend money on new "fashionable" clothes just becos i want to look trendy n by "looking trendy i can glorify God"? (quotations from actual pple)

don't get me wrong, i'm not against wearing nice trendy clothes to church. i'm totally fine with that, dressing well does give pple a good impression, BUT!

spending over half an hour during cell group discussing on fashion tastes and trends, criticising what other pple like to wear or trying to dictate what is considered "fashionable", is, in my opinion, a waste of time, n not only that, encouraging pple to judge themselves based on what others think, and not what God thinks. why spend so much time discussing on superficial issues and personal preferences, rather than exploring biblical principles that will help us understand why dressing well is important?

will God love a person more if he wears Ed Hardy shirts, as compared to a person in plain t-shirt and jeans? honestly isn't the answer painfully obvious?

and does the church expect everyone to be sharp dressers who have the best fashion sense, who wear ridiculously over-priced clothes and hideously fake smiles? is that really such a major factor in reaching out to the lost?

honestly i think some pple look like crap when they try to follow fashion magazines n wear whatever they think is the latest fashion, or if they are trying to be "emo" with thick mascara (even guys) n gothic lolita clothes with fishnet stockings n other weird stuff. but hey, if they wanna dress that way in order to dress their best for God, who am i to judge them? do i try to tell them my opinion n force them to submit to what i think they should be wearing? or are they even bothered by what other pple are perceiving about them?

at the end of the day, what you wear doesn't make you a Christian, its what you say and do, its who you are, on the inside, where pple can't see, where only God can see.

birthday weekend coming up!

2008-10-03T17:16:00.003+08:00

oh man, its 5.20 pm already n the weekend is a mere 40 min away! sweet! hahaha.. damn sian now man, actually quite sleepy n feel like dozing off for a few min, but every now n then the phone rings n jolts me up wide awake! damn i'm getting tired easily these days at work. but then again, its definitely not what i envisioned myself to be doing as a lawyer, doing complicated paperwork, but nonetheless, still paperwork! LOL!

at least i got a movie at 12.30 am to look forward to! hope its a good show n doesn't disappoint or put me to sleep!

right, gotta get back to work n finish off my stuff before 6 pm!

celebration 1 n 2 on 1st october!

2008-10-02T10:14:00.002+08:00

boss not in again today! haha.. shoik man. can relax this few days. grinz.

celebrated puikwan's birthday at brewerks at clark quay. quite expensive meal, n i had a glass of fruit beer which tasted a bit funny. got quite sweaty n a little whoozy after that, but overall had a good time with pk n friends. haha.

after dinner, watched Painted Skin with joan, ian, millie, melisa, nic, n one of millie's friend, i think her name is weiwei or something, on tues night. quite average, nothing terribly fantastic about the show. its not a bad show, but its not good as well, its like watching a 2 hour chinese kungfu-romance-supernatural flick with big names in the cast but quite a predictable storyline.

reached home at about 3 am n slept till 12 noon, then went for a nice shabu shabu japanese lunch with family, mindice n joan. oh well i guess sooner or later they'll be family too. haha. nice food, but quantity quite small, roughly $30 each, not too bad. better than the $300 set lunch at the other chinese place.

went home, watched another horror movie with joan which was so boring i nearly fell asleep in front of the tv, then went to meet ex-cg members (n 2 sf pple) for dinner at waffle town. not bad lah, joan's 2nd year running organising outing for my birthday! pple who turned up were: Mikki, Michelle, Clarence, SK, BK, weiken, bowen, mark, millie, ian n of course my beloved joan, who went to get a chocolate cake before coming. =)

had a nice dinner with them, took quite a few pictures (uploaded on facebook, awaiting the rest from mikki's camera) n everyone went home at about 10.30 pm. clarence n sweekeng went to tan tock seng to report sick n get MC, but in the end not successful. hahaha.. BK n small kenneth came over to watch bleach movie at around 1 am, watched until 3 am. oh man!! i was super sleepy i almost fell asleep again, if not for the absolutely cool action scenes in the movie! hitsugaya was quite weak in it, n i'm getting abit sian of watching Ichigo as the main character all the time, n the plot is actually quite weak with lots of loop holes, never explain much on the new characters introduced. think i will borrow the movie from BK n watch again, when i'm more awake to enjoy it better! think even joan will like it.

quite an eventful holiday, if i should say so myself. haha!

so many birthdays n weddings coming up!

2008-09-30T10:00:00.002+08:00

Wow, there's like 3 pple (including myself) who are celebrating their birthdays in my firm this month! Puikwan, Hongyee and myself, the 3 new lawyers somehow all have birthdays in october! And i think we get along pretty well as friends as well as colleagues, so thank God for sending these guys into my life! i mean, before they came, going to office was pretty lonely n boring, but after these 2 malaysians came, at least i had some pple of my age to talk to. seriously God does answer prayers, i've prayed for good colleagues becos i needed some lunch buddies n friends in the office, and He answered my prayers rather quickly! Hallelujah!

Oh n i got an SMS from lijuan, one of my old friends, who's getting married in november! actually, we used to like each other a few years back, when i had just broken up with my ex-gf, but because she's not saved, i didn't do anything n focused on God, n we still remained good friends till this day. i still remember we met during the new year's eve countdown at orchard, i think it was jason or weixiang who asked his friend to join us for the countdown party, n i got to know lijuan from that friend (i can't even remember that friend's name now! haha!) and i didn't realise Lijuan was from AJC as well, the same JC i was from, though she was one year my senior. haha.. i'm really happy for her, she's honestly one of the nicest girls i've ever met in my life. Congrats to her n her husband!

(oh yeah for those who're wondering what the heck am i doing blogging at 10 am at work, well my boss didn't come to office today n she's working from home, so yayy!! hahaha)

Last night had a nice dinner with Millie n Ian, somehow even though we've been seeing each other almost everyday for more than 2 weeks, i'm amazed at how we'll still meet up during our free time. I had to help Millie with her essay about triads, n honestly i was quite tired n had a headache, but hey, they always say, a friend in need is a friend in deed and indeed, i would want to be that friend. (haha, cheesy yes i know..!) had dinner at the pizza place n oh man, we ordered a large pizze n a pasta to share between 3 of us, Millie ate the whole pasta n took a slice of our pizza! think she must have been really hungry. haha.. but anyway after writing the essay we went to cineleisure to take a look at what movies were showing but it was too late anyway so we went home, n that was when i heard the "white hair and tits" joke n laughed until my face muscles ached! who wants to know more, why not ask the man himself, Ian Lim. Hahaha! Oh yeah, sorry i had to be the light bulb there guys. Haha..

oh n i bumped into Mikki at the mrt as well, n on the way home i called her to chat to catch up with her. so many things have happened since we last chatted, somehow i feel kinda sad that we're no longer as close as before, our lives have taken us in different directions n different circle of friends, but i'll always look upon her as my little sister, even if the cute little Mikki that i used to know has grown up and has many guys chasing her now. haha! but she's just not interested in anyone of them n wants to focus on her cell group ministry, so too bad guys, just back off or stay as normal friends, she doesn't want to be forced into anything until she's 21 (next May).

and as i was discussing with joan on how to celebrate my birthday n she was telling me its very diffficult to buy something for me, i just remembered last year the super romantic n sweet things she did for me at my birthday, i almost cried!

in 2007, i celebrated my birthday at my aunt's house in yishun, joan secretly worked together with 2-3 of my members, using light sticks formed the words "Happy Bday" at the grass patch n asked my cell member to bring me to the window, n i was shocked! then the next thing i knew she was in front of me with a chocolate cake n smiling from ear to ear n the cell group sang happy birthday! oh man, that was the MOST memorable birthday i ever had, joan was so sweet to organise everything to surprise me, n i really enjoyed myself. but ok, let's not go back to the past, like i was telling Ian, i wanna ask God to show a replay of my life when i get to heaven, so i can relive all those good memories! hahaha..

Sat, ktv with family, relatives n ex-cg members, Sun, dinner at clark quay with SF members, Monday, spending a whole day with Joan to celebrate my birthday. Somehow, like what Mikki said, I always like to celebrate my birthday with lots of pple. Sweekeng called n asked what am I doing for my birthday on monday afternoon n i was stunned n didn't even realised i haven't seen him in months n yet he still remembers my birthday! good friends, these chaps. ha, if they think my brithday is celebrated in a grand way, wait till they check out my wedding plans. haha! Strikeforce, church choir performance, band showcase, etc.. ok can't reveal too much now. hehz.

God, its been a great year so far, thanks for everything, for all the blessings, for the great family n friends in my life, for the new flat, for the good colleagues, for the strikeforce, for being my God even when i'm rebellious n stubborn n sinful at times, at the end of the everyday i want to be walking in Your will, i want to make You happy, i want to enjoy this Christian life with You.

F1 weekend - what an exhausting weekend!

2008-09-29T11:00:00.002+08:00

Played a total of 7 gigs from last Wed till Sunday night, and man, does my body ache all over! My shoulders are aching from carryin n slinging all the toms, my arms are aching from carrying UDMs, my right elbow is painful i think maybe an old injury giving me problem since i use a lot of my right hand to hit the quarter notes, my knees are all blue-black all over, my feet n hands have blisters n i got a bit of sun burn. oh n my calves are aching as well, probably from all the jumping n dancing around with the tom. in fact i think my whole body is aching n was stretched n strained to near its limit, but not really at my limit yet, haha!

But it was simply FANTASTIC!!!

i haven't played tom for quite a long time, i think for past few gigs i've played snare or toys, but since there's abundance of real drummers this time round, i was assigned to the tom. oh n i played the sudo for one of the performances and oh man! i'm glad neo n rohan r the usual guys playing the sudo, because although its not heavy, it keeps banging against your legs and the sudo MALLETS are heavy! i didn't feel anything until near the end of flightphesy, at the tycotus, i was like, oh man, my arms are getting tired! n to think those guys play tat for several performances! hats off to them.

david excels at the rapanik. really, i don't think anyone in the strikeforce can play tat instrument as "Garang" n as musically as him! awesome solos from him, glad he was there to really add the punch to the solos!

yup, n this thurs there's another gig! when jen sms me at 7 am this morning, i was like, oh man, who sends sms this early. i don't know if i have the strength to play for tat gig, but since its 9 pm at night, i will be able to make it, so jus volunteer n see if my muscles recover by then! hahaha..

but..

although we had a lot of fun, n it was like party party jokes n laughter all the way thru out the performances, there were a few disagreements n unpleasant moments. people were flaring up n getting angry with each other, scolding n arguing n stuff. n the contact pple got a round table from Boon as well, as i heard from joan. i guess its inevitable to have conflicts when we're together so often, we get to see all sorts of "pattern" n personality clashes n idea differences between all the SF members. n of cos, we're all not perfect, differences will definitely exist. my poor dear was so stressed n upset, n i didn't even notice it until she told me she needed my support n encouragement.. i'm quite dense at such things sometimes. i mean, not as if i have a lot of experience in BGR to be able to understand girls so well! hahaha..

there's a lot of things that i noticed n probably even more things that i didn't notice but others did n told me, which are probably too sensitive for blogging, but i guess everything will work out alright. isn't serving God the ultimate goal in minsitry, n not satisfying a desire to express your disatisfaction or pointing fingers at others for their faults? as long as the performances go smoothly n everyone enjoys themselves at the gigs n God gets the glory for using us to shine for Him in the marketplace, i'm happy n satisfied that i've done a service for him. u may not be the lead player or the UDM player, but that doesn't mean u're not contributing. u may be taking video or pushing the UDM, or like Kell who waited patiently for us n looked after our belongings while we were performing. does it mean he's playing less of an important role? i don't think so. yeah sure, it must be really boring n no doubt i know i'd feel a little exasperated if i were the one looking after bags n pouring water to refill UDMs, but thats what we all did in the beginning. that's why i wanted to be a helper on friday n not a player, so that others may shine while i stay behind, to know that i don't live to show off my skills n perform for crowds like any band or school ECA, but i serve to glorify God in a ministry.

at the end of the day, my kudos don't just go to all the players. of cos they all did a fantastic job, they spent all their energy n played their hearts out, which is good! they did well n they received their praise from the roar of approval n thunderous clapping from the crowd. they got their reward, n they have every right to enjoy n savour the moments.

but my thanks also go to the very important pple who helped make the performances possible, who didn't even perform but helped out in any way they could. People like Kell, and Reid's girlfriend. I mean at least Kell's in strikeforce, but Reid's girlfriend isn't even part of the team n she helped looked after bags n stuff. People like Christine who took video n never complained about not being able to play. People like Desmond, who drove the equipment around the whole weekend, sacrificing his time n money (for petrol n ERP) to bring us the drums we need. They don't get their thanks from many people, they don't bask in the limelight of a great performance. But without them there would be no performance. So my thanks n kudos to all who helped out at the F1 performances! God surely has treausres stored up for your stewardship n servanthood!

on another note, oct 5 my birthday is coming this sunday. i wanted to celebrate with SF, but currently running low on funds from all the cabbing around, n i almost want to slap myself for buying that super-ex coat from zara, which i've yet to wear. guess i learnt a lesson not to shop on impulse! hahaha.. but really, i want to spend next monday with joan, away from everyone n everything else, no handphones ringing or smses, just the two of us, spending time together. its been a long time since we really had quality time, my job just keeps me so busy, plus drumfest n F1 n cell group outings n outreaches, i think i want to spend time with my girlfriend n just.. u know.. walk down the beach or have a relaxing drink or something. hope my boss approves my leave for next monday! =p

if i could i would take 2 days off, but as usual there's a dateline for a project next week, so yeah. it kind sucks living on a tight schedule, but at least wed is a public holiday!! can SLEEP in n relax, maybe go for a spa or something. haha.

i really need to get more sleep!

2008-09-23T14:53:00.002+08:00

darn, almost fell asleep in the meeting earlier on! damn hard to concentrate when u've just had lunch n been on your toes the whole morning, n my mind is on a 101 things to do n i feel like i can't handle it anymore.. haiz..

i think i'm close to my breaking point liao. sometimes i see my work n i just don't even want to touch it. i see the mass of emails n the phone rings off the hook n i let it ring n refuse to answer. this isn't the way i envisioned this job to be. sigh..

last night worked until 9.30 pm before going for practice, until about 12 midnight, n reached home around 12.45 am. slept prob around 1.30, n woke up at 7 am today to reach office early to prepare for meeting. my eyes are quite dry from the freezing air con in my room, but worse is that my eyes keep wanting to shut n my body is slow to respond to work, my brain is not thinking clearly n i'm making more mistakes than usual..

i'll be glad when 1 oct comes n i can finally get a day of rest. i haven't even apply for leave on oct 6 to take time off to celebrate my birthday with joan, who's also stressed about her school and finances, she has to work to pay off her own sch expenses, books, etc, n she can't cope with the work load as it is.

things aren't looking good Lord, how can i survive the week.. i really need your grace n strength, n to get thru the F1 weekend, i need more supernatural energy from You n motivation to perform my best for Yout oo.. its not about the glamour of F1 racing, its just another super hectic n tiring weekend for me. but i love it nonetheless, which is more than i can say for my job..

We got the 5 room flat at AMK!

2008-09-22T16:10:00.002+08:00

So many things happened over the weekend that I'm literally still in stunned mode.

Well, on friday prayer meeting was really good, i was quite surprised to find that after a long abscene from the cell group, i could still flow with them n fellowship with them quite easily n naturally. went for supper with william after cg, pratahouse was too crowded so we just had some bak chor mee at thomson road.

sat i was supposed to go back to office, but i was so exhausted i slept until noon, n then went for lunch with joan n family, before going to AMK central park to choose the unit. after a long deliberation on housing loan, which floor n which unit is better, etc, we decided on unit #27-227, 5 room flat at 117 square meters. it cost a total of $657,000 (excluding stamp fees n legal costs) and my parents had to fork out 5% payment on the day itself, and 15% payment in 9 weeks time. that totals to about $117,000!! no wonder a lot of units were left even though my queue number was quite high. i mean how many singaporeans can cough up 100k in 2 months? what, borrow from a bank or loan shark? its ridiculous, honestly..

but anyway i'm still happy that we got that apartment. not super duper overjoyed kind of happy, but just satisfied that i've made a decision to buy a property for my future. joan was super stressed n even up to last night, she was still so stressed up n worried about how we are going to finance the loan. to be completely honest, i was a litte apprehensive too. 600k is a lot of money! but then again, i shouldn't be afraid of working a little harder, saving alittle more, sacrificing a bit more for my future house. to be completed by dec 2011, so i suppose i can get married around oct or nov 2011, n that gives me about 3 years more.. thats actually too far away. haha!!

i actually want to get married in late 2010. i know 20 Oct 2010 seems like such a nice number right? 20-10-2010! but then again, it'll prob cost even higher due to the "auspicious" numbers! maybe will got for early 2011 lah. am i being very singaporean n overly pragmatic in basing my marriage on the price of the wedding n the flat?? hahaha..

don't worry i will still plan my great wedding proposal to joan. it will definitely be good, but not any thing soon while she's studying! it'll be too weird taking a study break to get married!

oh yeah n after getting the flat, we rushed for service, then went for KTV with the strikeforce pple. didn't really sing much, my voice wasn't too good that day, but still had a lot of fun with the SF pple! i think about 14-15 pple turned up in total. oh we celebrated rallen's birthday as well too. wah, heidi can sing quite well! she's really cute n pretty, she will definitely be a babe when she grows up! hahaha... then again on sunday i was supposed to go work, i overslept until about noon again!!

dunno why i'm so exhausted these days. but went to work for a couple of hours before going river walk for the practice cum photoshoot for the straits times. actually wasn't much of a practice last night, for me at least. more of a fellowship session n logistics session, moving back the udms to the warehouse n eating junkfood for dinner. but at the end of the night we had astons, n though the service was pretty bad, the food was excellent.

before we know it, monday strikes again. hahaha.. what a boring day. i mean i'm busy but i'm also bored, n i'm hell of a sleepy as well. i think i need to take bus back n sleep on the 76 home. tml got 2 meetings back to back n i still haven't prepared the stuff for the meetings yet. sighz...

corporate work is really quite boring. i'm falling asleep in front of my computer everyday after lunch. damn sian!

In a flash, its Friday already!

2008-09-19T16:02:00.002+08:00

one more day to the selection of our flat at The Central at amk! i hope we get a nice unit above 10th floor facing away from the sun n away from the school! but honestly our chances of getting a desirable flat are quite low, given our queue number of 537.. crap, gotta get back to work, boss is hounding me again.. update again later

Drumfest 2008 and a big headache to rush my forms for the HDB loan..

2008-09-15T15:42:00.004+08:00

(Apologies to Boon for putting incorrect statements on the blog. I'm fully aware who bears the cost of Drumfest, and I assume SF pple should know as well.)

Its 4.15 pm in the afternoon and I feel like I've already worked for hours when in actual fact I've only worked for a little over 2.5 hours or so? I just feel so lethargic and exhuasted, my muscles are a little aching, and the air condition is rather warm today (I suppose i should be happy that its not freezing cold anymore).

But anyway I had a great weekend at the drumfest 2008, starting with the gig on friday.

had dinner with millie n yanqin then went for a gig with only 6 pple at Hotel Intercontinental at around 9 plus at night. wasn't too bad, but definitely wasn't good either. mistakes made by almost everyone. haiz. but that was just the beginning of the super hectic weekend.

after the gig, went home to get the car to drive to airport to fetch the rockstar guys, Rafeal, Nate morton, Cory, and Storm Large. (i got a hug from storm, and oh man, she is tall and has that rocker chick attitude man!) they were really friendly and nice, but had a hell of a lot of equipment to transport, boon's RUSH and my WISH (which is a 6 seater with a boot) was barely enough for the band, plus the drivers and chaperone (Ian).

no wait, before fetching them i think Ian and i went to fetch Johny Rabb n chris paterson (sp?) the lesser known drummers but i think johnny was really nice n accommodating. i did talk to them a bit about the food in singapore n got their craving for local delights. hahaha! chilli crab anyone? apparently that was too spicy for them, hehz. that was pretty uneventful, but thank goodness i didn't pick up virgil donati, everyone says he's a little weird or eccentric, and come on , to practice drums for 5 hours in a row without any rest eventhough you're jetlag? its either ultra disciplined or downright nuts. hahaha...

anyway after fetching those 2 guys to the hotel, we went to studio to help shift things, that took about 1.5 hours or so, until around 3.45 am or so, then went over to Ian's house to take a bath n a short half hour nap, then at 5.15 am we checked the flight schedule and to our horror, Rock Star pple had landed about an hour earlier than expected! needless to say, we rushed to the airport and met them at about 5. 40 am with Boon.

oh yeah Ian's house is quite big, n the sofa is really soft.. hahaha! i think i knocked myself out on the couch while he was typing stuff on his laptop. poor guy. but then agian, half an hour of sleep didn't make much of a difference.

after sending them to the hotel, we went to fort canning to help out move stuff again, then went to buy breakfast for the pple, and i got to fetch the American idol pple with Sy Smith and Teddy Campbell, along with julia, so that was kinda cool! they weren't as friendly as the Rockstar pple, but then again, i was to zonked out n zombified to talk much anyway. haha..

after that the rest of the day was spent fetching artistes up and down from the concert venue to the hotel, n buying food n other stuff for them inbetween journeys. oh man, by the time the AI pple ended their set and I drove them back, i was on the brink of collasping.

oh yeah, n i did fall asleep at one red light while fetching the AI band back from their sound check in the afternoon! haha! i think they didn't really mind though. they were just laughing about it. =p

thankfully on sunday i managed to catch about 7 hours of sleep cos rockstar pple cancelled their sound check which was supposed to be at 10 in the morning, so i only needed to pick them up with Liting at about 12.30 pm. it was hilarious the way Rafeal was so obviously hitting on liting! "oh looks like there's no more space in the car.. liting will have to sit on someone's lap." and even nate got into the act!

nate: "are you coming to tonight's party?"
LT: "oh i don't think so i've got to get up early for work tml.. haha"
nate: (after a look that said you-gotta-be-kidding) "let me try this again. are you coming to tonight's party?" (ends with a super funny smile)

oh n i can't believe storm large is 39! man! in the photos she looks early 20s, in real life she doesn't have any wrinkles, wears tight leather pants and barely looks 30! amazing! n i thought americans age more quickly than asians. =p oh yeah n her vocal class was quite funny as well, she was more interested in talking about singapore than any vocal points. her first time giving a vocal class i think, n whatever she shared was pretty basic knowledge for any wanabe singer. oh except for the gaggling the throat with smashed panadols or baking soda. i think that's not a good way to deal with a bad throat before you sing, n it will get more damaged after that, but i guess that's a last resort.

sunday passed by pretty much in a daze, and oh yes, i forgot to mention the crazy speed at which we played crazy army! oh man, Ian forgot n gave the flightphesy BPM instead, everyone was shocked but we still played on, sounded alittle messy, but i guess its ok. flightphesy was good! i felt the vibes, the grooving was great, n FHW, all i can say is i never knew it would be tiring playing the snare part for FHW! i think i used a speed which was too high as well, Ian and everyone else was clearly super exhuasted at the end of it! hahaha... but i think the crowd liked us, we certainly opened the drumfest with a big loud bang!

sunday was more relaxed than saturday, but tempers flared and sales were not as well. actually there's a lot of negative things i can say about the drumfest, but i prefer not to mention the unpleasantness as this wil probably be the last time boon organises the drumfest. i don't blame him, after making huge losses for 2 years running, even if i had the cash to keep it going, i would throw in the towel and call it a day. n worse, to have partners n workers who aren't helping you effectively n do things arbitrarily (ahem, a certain black Mos burger) n sadly SF members who aren't helping out whole-heartedly (they know who they are) or didn't even turn up to help at all.

but on the whole i would say i enjoyed myself. i think Irenus was truly very amused at my girlfriend's comments to me n the incredulous look on my face when she makes unbelievable remarks. haoshan was also being very accommodating n professional in her job, n lynette (i never knew who she was until drumfest itself!) did quite a good PR job, the AI pple were on the news n Sy Smith herself commented that lynette was very good n had many connections with the media.

but seriously, at the end of sonofas' show, there were so few pple left, i think only about 30 or 40 pple in the audience bothered to stay so late, n the SF pple needed to go home to rest for work today. its just unthinkable to stay back to load things n transport heavy stuff around, n still have energy left for the next day at work. i mean school, o k lah, can always sleep in class or even pontang sch, but working adults can't just randomly take off from work.

which brings me to my last point, me taking half day urgent leave off to settle the HDB loan forms. joan was super annoyed at the number of forms n the documents which we needed to get before we could submit the forms. n to be completely honest, i just take the half day so i could catch 1-2 hours more of sleep, rather than to settle the forms, but it turns out the time was really tight for application for the HDB loans n other forms, so we had no choice but to rush to TPY Hub to get a queue number to submit the form. thank God my boss seemed to understand that i needed to settle the things, n i won't take urgent leave for no good reason.

like i said earlier to joan, i've got totally no strength or mood to work today, i just dragged my feet to office cos i know my boss will freak out if i take a whole day off, n i'll just get hell of a scolding tml. so i'm just here today to chill, reply a few emails, n answer phone calls. Sigh. Lawyering may bring in the bucks, but with added stress, responsibility n work load. i think i will only practice for a maximum of maybe 20 years before i get really fed up with this kind of job n lifestyle.

Too many things happened over the weekend! MC on Monday liao..

2008-09-09T15:27:00.002+08:00

I can't even remember what I did last friday.. oh yeah, i went with my parents n neighbours n joan n weiliang n mindice to celebrate my mum's birthday at minori! honestly i think the standard of that place is dropping. either that, or i'm getting sick of going to the same japanese restaurant all the time. haha. oh man, the group of adults were so noisy, i felt like i was in a hawker center. but i think my mum likes the gift i got for her, so its worth it.

Watched Wall E with Joan at plaza sing at 11 pm after the dinner, n honestly i was quite tired n wanted to doze off at certain parts of the show, but somehow the movie was really so good that i ended up wide awake at the end of it! super cute wall E and Eva, robots who have more personality than certain humans i know! haha.. i dun mind getting the DVD when it comes out.

did i play a gig on sat? all i remember is waking up really late for SF prac at east coast.. ah now i remember. the practice under the hot sun from 10.30 am till about 1.20 pm, then went for lunch with a few of them, before heading home. was supposed to go back to work on sat, but oh well, screw it lah, work can always wait.. weekends are for relaxing! i think after taking a short nap at home, i went out with joan, we had thai express n spent time just walking around, n then had dessert, oreo cheesecake. oh yeah, n bumped into boon n family at marina square as well! small world! i think i went to joan's house to play with the kittens after that, until about 1 am, n woke up on sunday morning feeling sick. should i blame the cats?? hahaha...!

sunday didn't do much, just slept until 1 pm, then went to play DOW for a while, before rushing for MTT at riverwalk, then pratice at joochiat for the friday gig.

Monday i was totally wasted. sorethroat, headache, flu, the works. after seeing doctor in the morning, i went home to watch Hamburger Hill with my bro (who is still at home btw), then joan came over n we watched Meet the Spartans! totally stupid show, but quite entertaining lah. supposed to watch another movie, but joan wanted me to go with her for practice, so we went to meet up with Millie n buy Ian a ORD present (a wind vane no less!) then went to studio n practice until about 10.15 pm.

not quite recovered from my sickness yet, but no choice lah, had to come to work cos too much work to do liao. sigh, i can't imagine taking more than one day off from work in a week.

this fri got a gig at 9 pm, then followed by drumfest over the weekend, then one weekend of rest before the F1 weekend! tons of gigs n performances, exhuasting n physically tiring, but still i really enjoy spending time with joan n the strikeforce guys! esp now that more n more couples r springing up, its almost like, or rather it practically is, family!

really hope that ticket sales go up soon, 41 tickets for a 500 capacity audience is really pathetic. not even 10%! i mean, i really want to go out n help spread the word for drumfest, but my work is keeping me pinned down, n the most i can help is to drive the musicians around n perform on the day itself. yes, it will be glorious, it will be fun, lots of energy n hype,but at the end of it, i'm still worried for boon n his family..

Love song for the one

2008-09-01T11:11:00.003+08:00

Verse 1:

The moon light shines down her face as she looks to
Me in our embrace and her eyes paint
A picture of love so beautiful noone can explain

We dance across the room slowly swaying
To the music that plays in our heads but noone else can
Hear the enchanting melody that isn't really there at all

Chorus:

You are the awesome love of my life the only one
Who can lift me up when my world comes crashing down
No other girl will ever hold a candle to you
You are the craziest girl that I've ever known
Your smile speaks louder than any word in this song
I thank God that I'm gonna live my life with you

Gonna spend the rest of my life with you

Verse 2:

So time passes by so fast we hardly knew that
we've been in love for 3 years and counting and I am falling
Deeper and deeper, I'm drowning in this ocean of love for you

Bridge:

waited for so long for this broken
boy who was hardly worth all you gave
you reached out your hand and pull me from my grave

Stolen from Ian's blog: Some serious food for thought in a not-so-serious way!

2008-08-28T16:57:00.003+08:00

The following shows how easily the human mind draws its conclusions without knowing the full facts, and also how the church, as it becomes modern n flashy, must never forget the reason behind its existence..

By the way, Ian took this from KC's blog, just so to give due credit!

*****

Dear Apostle MegaSleek

Greetings in the name of the Lord!

I write to share with you good reports about how our church has been transformed!We are so impacted by your message on "Pimp Your Church" with the latest revelation on 7 steps to church growth. In fact after applying the principles, we are able to position the church in the most relevant way to the unchurched.

We have purchased the most advanced sound system and video equipment.
We have hired the best looking and skillful musicians to be on the worship team.
We are releasing the most cutting edge music albums every year.
We have planned the best church conferences with the hottest line up of speakers.
We are launching the most sophisticated projects that is unheard of in this century, even the media is hot on our movement.

Of course with the latest implementation comes much resistance from the older members, especially those with us from the beginning, just as you have warned us. However like you say, change is necessary and not to change is destructive. We have to let them go and maybe that is for the better as we keep the unity of the vision.

One of the oldest member happened to give us the most problems.

Firstly, he insisted that we are ignoring him and not paying him much attention. I had to remind him that church is not all about him. He complained that church worship has become a show and is no longer ministering to him. Once again, i tell him not to be so self-centered but to be more vision-minded. He then questioned why we have removed the cross from the pulpit and message, I told him that his likings are too traditional and old school. He feedback that all the conferences and projects are not helping people at all and the church need him. How ridiculous and arrogant can that be just because he was an old-timer! I had to tell him off and reminded him again that church can't be all about him and certainly no one is indispensable! I guess he didn't take that well and with much sadness he finally left.

However, apart from that, all is going smoothly and more people are joining us and things are looking great! We look forward to you coming to share more revelation with us.

Oh, before I forget, the old-timer guy who left may be going to other churches and if you happen to see him, just take note of what i have said. By the way, his name is Jesus.. if I didn't remember wrongly...

May you be greatly blessed!

Reverend Wannabe

Dazed in the day again

2008-08-28T15:05:00.002+08:00

damn sian.. last night supposed to go out play LAN games or catch a movie, but in the end all back out, n i worked until 8 pm so either way i simply wouldn't be able to go out.. but on the bright side, i managed to meet u with Joan for a nice dinner, I ate the usual chicken chop, and she ate some ban mian thingy. After that, had a donut before Joan sent me to the 163 bus stop n i took bus home.. still managed to play a game of Dark Crusade ("Go Space Marines! For the Emperor!!") of 3v3 before heading off for bed.

what a dull life! simply no more time to go out after work, or even if i have time, my energy is drained n i'm quite tired n listless after work.. prob due to mental stress than physical tiredness. i mean, how tired can i get from sitting in a chair typing all day? the only exercise i get is walking to the printer, walking to the toilet, or walking to the water dispenser to refill my cup, n once in a while walking to my boss or colleague's room. the mental stress however, is another matter altogether. i feel quite overwhelmed sometimes, like i'm so clueless n inexperienced. guess its like that when u first start working..

anyway Joan n i have been having weird dreams lately. i dreamt of losing my temper n doing some terrible things to Joan, she dreamt of betraying me n falling for some other unknown guy.. i don't get it, we seem totally fine n in love, i don't think there's any issue or problem between us, so why the weird dreams recently? i don't know, n i don't like it. its like some unseen force trying to draw us apart even though we're really closer than before. honestly, i've never felt happier with any other person in my life.

JWIM outing (no its not misspelling of gym!)

2008-08-26T14:54:00.004+08:00

Had a nice time with Joan Millie and Ian last night! Went Sweelee to buy sticks, then went to Miss Clarity Cafe for candlelight dinner, then went to Raffles City Shopping Centre to buy my socks and underwear, then went home at about 9.30 pm. Dunno if Ian and Millie went to Mac to chill or not but honestly I was too tired to stay out much later.

Sorry guys! Next time I promise we stay out later lah. Cos running low on cash, can't take cab to send Joan home liao. End of the month pay haven't come yet, so gotta stinge a bit. =P

I think I love these guys, they're super fun to hang out with. Sure, we cross swords once in awhile but then again, if a relationship can't survive a few bangs here n there, then it isn't really a close friendship right? Hahaha.. I think only God knows how many times i cross swords with Edwin, Millie n even Luke liao, but after a day or two, everything's back to normal. hehz.

I think it'll be really cool if the 4 of us went on holiday together, maybe go diving at tioman island, or chill out at the beaches at langkawi. Haha.. but perhaps not so soon, overseas trips r expensive. =P

So planning for my brother's 21st birthday party this coming saturday. a lot of things to do, coordinate with his friends, his girlfriend, my cousins n relatives.. without joan's help i think i'll be super overworked. hehz.

Drumfest 2008 coming on sept 13 n 14. oh man, i wanted to ask for leave from boss on 15 sept, cos i KNOW i'll be super extra EXHUASTED after the drumfest weekend, n probably need a day to recover or else i'll end up taking MC n annoying my boss again. i dunno if i'll be assigned to be driver / security / hospitality person again this year, but i'll help out as much as i can, i guess. i already slacked enough last sat, was supposed to help out at the band challenge but dunno why i was down with severe headache in the morning, n my body was super lethargic.. i didn't even do anything last friday besides go for dinner with my JC friends n chill out till around 11 plus in town.. but we did laugh a hell lot n eat a lot ice cream n fries at macs though, perhaps that was what made me sick! McDiahorrea! hahaha..

God give me the courage to ask boss for leave! asking her for one day leave is like asking her to give u a scolding for free. =P but still i think leave is better than MC bah. =P

ok from now until the end of the year, i must go jogging twice a week, on tues n thurs! i can't stand it liao, getting fat! can't fit into my size 31 pants anymore! oh man!!

class gathering, SF gathering (Hazel's birthday actually) and dark clouds gathering

2008-08-25T15:05:00.002+08:00

Whats with the weather these days, its absolutely freezing in singapore. Such shoik weather means time to get more sleep, harder to wake up in the mornings as well. haha..

first up, thanks to Wilson for organising the class gathering with our class tutor Siau laoshi! I think it has been what, months since i last saw the class girls (though i did meet sujin to ask her to help me with some chinese contract and i think wilson n i met qinning last year during teachers day or something) n it was quite fun catching up on the latest news, who's getting married, who's working as what, etc.

Oh yeah, congrats to Sujin who's getting married in December! i'm sure we'll make your wedding an event to remember! hehz.. oh n i think cuixia's getting married as well, but we've no idea who's the guy.. at least we've seen sujin's boyfriend on her blog pics before. =P sigh Sujin, the only girl i ever chased who didn't bite the bait. hahaha.. out of the 10 guys, 4 guys chased her before, 1 got together with her for a week. alright, if u wanna know the full story, i'm not gonna tell u! hahaha.. =P

it was damn funny laughing about the good old days in anderson junior college n how freaking childish we were! especially the guys. actually, only the guys. hahaha!!

long triangles, love hexagons, shanghai beach machine guns, karaokes in lecture halls, coughing our lungs out, skipping school, coming in late and climbing the fence, vandalising the sch, torturing the poor econs teacher Daniel Wong, class chalet at loyang, BBQ at kevin's place, the tons of racist jokes n fat jokes n act cool jokes (directed on u-kno-who), the weird Simon who runs all the time, the chicken n rice stall, running to the LAN shop at suntec, everything, all the memories came back at the dinner!

i can't write everything down cos it'll take days, but i laughed till i cried, n then laughed somemore. we were such idiots then! hahaha!

i treated them dinner. what could i do? they all expected the lawyer earning the most to treat, so i obliged, though i hope to recover my losses at the next class outing! hahaha.. ok lah ting tai feng, some chinese restaurant, not too ex lah.

seriously before God n church, my life was mostly hanging out n chilling with friends, at LAN shops, catching movies, going bowling, BBQs, KTVs, etc. actually after coming to church, i sort of neglected my friends a bit, cos church well, there's cell groups, prayer meetings n bible study classes, n ministry, n whole lot of other church activities.

but i do miss those days of just having fun, sometimes at the expense of others, laughing n joking our way through life, scoring the As, pleasing the teachers, breezing thru life.

working life is.. honestly, its BORING. its STRESSFUL. its AWFUL. its all those things u expect from a real job, n worse. i'm not even gonna compare my part time tuition, or telemarketing, or cafe jobs. i mean, those were for fun if i screwed up n i don't like the job, i just up n quit.

this ain't so simple in the REAL world. u wanna up n quit, pple r gonna spread bad things about u, n the legal industry in singapore is so small, pple won't want to hire u in the future. its really that small. n gossip n slander run amok all over, all the time.

anyway, on a side note, and even though she can't read yet, here's wishing HAZEL a HAPPY 1ST BIRTHDAY!! awesomely cute baby!

oh n boss is at home today, looking after her sick kid. so quite a relaxing day for me, i'm leaving at 6 pm sharp, can't be bothered to look hardworking anymore. wasted my time working on sunday when i could've just as easily done my work this morning! thought she wanted to see my work this morning, but in the end never even come to office..

The worst scolding I ever got, but also an enjoyable makeup cg n jogging on tues.

2008-08-22T09:44:00.003+08:00

Got blasted really bad by boss on Wed afternoon cos the annoying clients, instead of calling me to ask questions, went to shoot email to my boss to complain. really nothing to say about it liao, cos wat can i do right? corp sec work is not my problem anyway.

on the other hand, i enjoyed jogging with clarence, millie n yeewen on tues night. we jogged from millie's house along the mrt track, turn right along the edge of yishun, passed some army camps n the yishun nasi lemak place, then ended up back at millie's place again. i think we jogged about 3-4 km, in a square shape around yishun. haha!

then last night had cg at helen's house with the guy ban chuan as the CGL, not sure if pronounced his name correctly. he reminds me a lot of my cousin bernard for some reason. LOL! i think i enjoy millie's cg better than my own cg. i know most of the pple there, n they're more, erm how should i say, innocent n sincere n friendly? i dunno, but the CGL came over n spoke to me after cg n we had a nice chat, which was good. hehz. somehow everyone knew joan n i were together even if we didn't announce it or anything! hahaha..

but then again, that leads me to question myself.. i click with youths better than adults? does it mean i'm more childish n immature mentality? or do i have a biased n prejudiced view of adult cell groups? i really don't know. i've been to other adult cgs before, n i felt totally welcome there. i think it was at serangoon area, i went with mark n yorkbing for some makeup cg, though we were the only 3 young pple there, the cg made us feel very welcome. do i really click better with youths in general?

at my work place, i click instantaneously with puikwan n hongyee, the malaysian lawyers who are about my age, n the other legal associate who's about 40 i think? so i don't think i have problem communicating with pple of my age or older, so why can't i feel at home in my own cell group? why is it i feel this distance, not just between me n them, but between the other members as well? am i imagining this, or being overly judgemental or sensitive? am i having some sort of bad attitude toward my own cell group? i don't hang out with them or communicate with them at all thru out the week, not that i don't want to but i prioritise them below work, below joan, below meeting my other friends from ex-cg, below meeting friends from outside church, below SF members.. probably right at the bottom rung of the ladder. haha! -_-

no offence to them, i'm sure they are all fun n spiritual pple in their own right, but there's just something i can't describe or identify, that sets me apart from them. Joan can sense this for me too even though she seems to be able to mix with some of the cg pple quite well. i mean i get the feeling i'm in a bunch of strangers drawn together for a common purpose of worshipping God n thats it. no sense of comradeship, or brotherly or sisterly love, no sense of openess or trust. of cos i could say its all not coming from me either, so i'm partly to blame for the problem of disassociation, or being superficially social.

Exposure and confession

2008-08-18T16:17:00.004+08:00

For the past week, I've had several conversations with 2-3 friends about some stuff which I thought I knew pretty much enough to handle matters myself only to realise that sometimes the human heart boogles the human mind. Actually human emotions often conflict with the human mind, we've been fed with so much info on what is the right thing to do, what we should do, but often we don't feel like doing it. Or rather we know what we should not do, but the temptation, the feeling of doing it or just thinking about it is enough to make us shut down our minds and listen to our hearts - sometimes with unpleasant or even disastrous consequences.

I know who reads my blog often, of cos my beloved Joan, a few of my church and strikeforce friends, my overseas friends (dunno why all my good friends always end up going overseas to work/get married/study, is Singapore really such a lousy place to do all those things) and thats about it. My non-church friends don't get to read whatever I ramble on here, which is a good thing cos sometimes I write stuff that would make cell group leaders cringe and yell blasphemy, but at the end of the day I still maintain my stand that this is my blog and whoever reads it has to deal with the content it has in whatever way he/she takes it.

Btw, I was just reading a really old post on Lithiumised blog on how annoying it is when someone comes to rant and scold you about certain things you put on a blog, when its supposed to be part of your private life. But seriously, I share her sentiments on the issue. Its like the internet when it first came out, everybody wanted to control the content of it, filter out violence and porn, filter out political dissidents, filter out dangerous religious or racist articles, filter out advertisements for cigarettes and alcohol, and a whole lot of other censorship crap. But honestly, what the internet is filled with depicts the moral standards of society as a whole. It shows the ugly side of humanity in its fullness, the vices, the "worldliness", the whole shebang of bad stuff.

But the internet also shows the good side of things. The music videos that we can appreciate, the beauty of nature and space, the charities that help the poor and needy, the causes for the protection of minority races, etc. There's too much good things in the internet to mention, but probably an equally innumerable amount of bad things. So what the heck is the point I'm trying to make, dear reader?

A blog is a reflection of the person's current state of mind, his emotional wellbeing, his current situation in his life. It doesn't mean that if a person curses and swears on his blog means he's an uncivilised barbarian in disguise. If a person complains about things or other people in his life, it doesn't mean he isn't able to deal with it, or isn't trying his best to.

Yeah true, there is power in the words that come out of our mouth, or something that is written in the Bible to this effect. But how about the words that come out of our fingers, cos technically we're not speaking these words onto the blog, but rather typing them out? Haha! If i were in a court of law and asked to prove this point, I'd go into it and claim that if God was against blogging, He'd have put it down in His Word. Show me a passage that states you can't bare your soul to another person. Rather, thru out the Bible, the Word speaks of having faith toward God. Now how do you know if a person has faith to get saved? By beliving in his heart and speaking the words out in confession, that Jesus is Lord right? So if he has any doubts in his heart, does it mean he has no faith? Can doubt and faith co-exist? I believe pastor Phil has addressed this issue before. But let me bring it to another level. If faith and doubt can co-exist, can a person have good thoughts and bad thoughts as well? Obviously, no doubt about it (pun intended).

So when a person writes on his blog, he can only write the good stuff? keep the bad stuff suppressed n let it build up? wait a min aren't we supposed to be honest with ourselves? come on , life isn't a bed of roses, just becos I smile a lot and treat everyone nice doesn't mean I'm a saint all the time. and the times when I let lose, I get condemned and pple say I'm immatured, I'm stumbling younger Christians, yadda yadda yadda. Let me put it this way:

1. If I'm immatured, then tell me what I should do in your subjective view of maturity.

Paul says if he has to boast of what he did, he can but he chooses not to, and considers all that rubbish for the sake of the Kingdom. I'm not so noble or highly qualified as Paul, but I indemnify myself by saying I write this not to put anyone down but rather to question the right of those whose comments seek to put me down.

Want me to list my accomplishments throughout my life? It may not be as many as the A*star scholars, and I'm no Micheal Phelps, but I've done some stuff. Second in Command in the NPCC in sec sch, enabling the unit to win GOLD award for the first time in the history of the eca. Prefect and class monitor for about 8 or 9 years of my life. Trashed every speaker in the debate team. Air Rifle club in JC, taking part in competition and getting 3rd in my first time shooting, then getting bored and quit the club to be more active in ministry. I don't even want to mention about ministry, cos pple will then turn around and question my motives for joining those ministries if I were to mention anything exciting about it or how proud I am to be able to serve in it. About my job, oh, did I mention I handle deals worth millions, or meet with ultra wealthy clients who are in some cases "untouchable" by the law? Granted, these opportunities and positions were given by God, and I wish to give Him full credit for it, but I know that my own character and personal decisions had a role to play too, however small it may be.

While I know that without the grace of God I could never have done all these, sometimes I just wanna tell the person "correcting" me, who do you think you're talking to? A juvenile delinquent who's high on drugs and low in intelligence? Give me a break man.

But I respect your opinion, I take it, I digest it and hope somehow or other it really is applicable to me. Do I hate you for it? Of cos not. Rebuke is never painless and always unpleasant, and sure I know its for my own good most of the time. But let me just turn things around and ask, have you put yourself in my shoes before telling me what to do? Do you know the entire truth surrounding my circumstances?

I may be able to put my blind faith in God but I certainly don't put blind faith in what people say. Too many seemingly gullible pple do that just to achieve their own objectives, while those who reason and ponder over and occasionally challenge the advice given by others are seen as "trouble makers" and dissenters, who ought to be deported or made bankrupt or locked away from the innocent sheep. (tip of my hat to Ian and Sebestian here. haha!)

actually i think i've written enough on that, cos i'm here to blog something entirely different and just sort of got carried away. haha. my bad.

How do you know when you're in love? When you just want to be with the person all the time? When you will give up anything for that person? When you wish that person to be happy even at the expense of your own happiness?

I'd like to think my own understanding of love transcends these typical BGR questions.

Pastor once preached, once a guy is married, he can no longer have any good friends who are girls. The best pals can only be guys, girls can stay as friends, but never best friends anymore. The girlfriend or the wife takes the place of best friend, lover, soul mate, etc. And I have to admit, it is the right train of thought to yield the desired results.

I know even though I am attached to a wonderful, caring, extremely cute and lovable girl, I sometimes get the thought of "what if". Not that I'm straying from her or loving her less, but issues of compatibility and personality does get me ruffled every once in a while. Here's what my friends have to say about it (summarized for your benefit):

If you think you're more compatible with another person then you're just looking at the superficial things. Character is more valuable than personality. You may have the chemistry in another activity with another girl, but is she able to bring your characer to another level? You may enjoy the company of another girl, but what is it about her that you are attracted to? Her outward beauty, her personality, her intelligence, or taste in music? You're putting your life and your girlfriend's life on the line by every moment of wandering, as harmless or innocent as it may seem. A weed is planted, it takes root, if unchecked it springs up and damages the garden. The garden you've taken great pains to prune and beautify, the blood and sweat and tears you've sown into it, the beautiful creation that the world stops to admire and appreciate. Is it all worth it? Are the "what ifs" worth it?

Really reminds me of pst phil's But God sermon. But God would not allow me to wander too far, or to let my thoughts or emotions dictate my actions. But God would always send me the Holy Spirit, no matter how rebellious I was, to keep me in check, to reel me into His presence, into His love.

But God reminds me of this fact which I know and nothing can change my mind or my heart:
I love Joan.

To quote from Julia's email (thanks for providing the inspiration), Joan, my heart remains with you. No matter how many times we argue, at the end of the day, I know you are envisioning our life together in our new flat, the furniture we're going to enjoy cuddling up on, the moments we're going to spend on our honeymoon, the places we're going to explore and take lots of photographs of, the children who will call you Mum and call me Dad, the school we're going to set up together, the vision of God we're meant to fulfil, the cultural mandate of music and law and education, the amazing world of opportunities just waiting to be birthed forth by God.

To throw this away for a "what if" that will never amount to anything? No way.

She tells me that she scares herself thinking about how much she loves me. I tell her it scares me that she trusts me enough to leave her heart, her life in my hands.

And through it all, God has always been in the centre of the relationship. Maybe we don't pray as much as other couples, we aren't as spiritual as other cell leader couples. That's ok, we can always work on that in the many, many years to come. Serving Him together in Strikeforce, in the cell group, at church.

Now that I really start to think about it, i realise God has indeed blessed us greatly. Thanks to Him, we have a future to look forward to, while many others have a bleak dismal image of the future. It is our duty to reach out to the lost even as a couple, to share the love of God with our friends and relatives. Well I don't think hard selling the gospel to strangers is going to work very well, so we're not going to go into that. Hahaha!

If anyone is wondering if there is a point to this post, there are several but the ultimate point is that I love Joan and if ever there comes a day of temptation, my love for God and my love for Joan will pull me through to make the right decision. How do I know it for certain? I don't. But I have faith.

(Blind faith, even in the wrong things, can be scarily powerful. Look at how the blind faith of the cursed townsfolk in Silent Hill kept them safe from the demons of hell despite having such blind faith in the wrong hands. Terrorist and extremist have the utmost faith in their false gods to be able to throw away their lives like that. In order to be able to be a soldier of Christ, we are to have faith that overcomes the world, not to mention faith that stands firmer than the evil resolve of the terrorists. Like the chinese who teach their missionaries how to be matyrs.

One thing that mr KFC aka Dr Peter Wagner omitted in his preaching on sunday is this - in a war, even if one side is victorious, it will suffer casualties. True, he did mention that the kingdom of heaven suffers violence, and that the gates of hell shall be taken by force and violence. But with every war, not only does the soldiers have to endure suffering, many of the soldiers will inevitable face death.

I wonder if the day ever comes when I have to choose between declaring my faith, or having my head sawn off at the neck like those poor hostages in the jungles, what would I do? Lie to save my life, or give it up to proclaim the name of Jesus? How many of you can honestly say you will do the later in all truth and honesty?)

Drum challenge finals, Joan's grandma's birthday, and my first morning prayer meeting!

2008-08-18T11:41:00.002+08:00

First of all..

CONGRATS TO ER CHOW KIAT FOR WINNING THE DRUM CHALLENGE ASIA!!!

Man, I knew he was talented, but didn't know he was that amazingly good! His precision skills and stick tricks probably bought the judges over. Noticed that the other contestants double pedal went out of time after about 1-2 bars, whereas Chow Kiat, while he didn't really do much double pedal stuff, was in time and consistent for most of his parts, so that was pretty slick!

Bet Boon must be really proud of him, this drum prodigy who is actually a regular member of Strikeforce! Let's hear it for CK! Awesome performance, groovy chops, crazy skills and nice stick tricks! The other guy who tried to do the stick tricks didn't execute the tricks with the speed and precision as Chaokiat, so he got 2nd for his showmanship, though I think CK winning was quite obvious as he is the only drummer combining drumming skills with showmanship!

Second, happy birthday to Joan's ah ma! 84 years old and still in the pink of health, that's one hardy and happy old woman!

Thirdly, thank You God for a very refreshing morning prayer meeting! I've never woken up this early just to pray before (goodness, the last time i woke up at 6 am was during army days, n i even woke up at 6.15 am only!) and I guess it really pays off. I didn't grab the breakfast though, no time to eat n stomach feels queasy too. Dunno why my stomach is so weak in the morning. But anyway just want to thank God for an enjoyable pm, could really feel His presence and I was praying so fluently, words and thoughts and verses just poured out of my mouth, and honestly I was amazed at the Holy Spirit being able to use a weak and tired body to really pray today! Well I paid the price for waking up slightly late (if I take the MRT i would've to wake up at 5.15 am, whereas I took cab and woke up at 6.15 am! an hour of precious sleep!! hahaaha) but it was ok, around $11 for the cabfare.

Thinking of where to go for lunch later..

planning a weekend trip for my birthday!

2008-08-14T14:43:00.002+08:00

with all my friends going on short trips to bali, or bangkok, or whatever, i was subtley influenced to go on a short vacation too, n i decided to go around my birthday weekend! of cos not to some fanciful expensive place lah, i can't really afford expensive holidays after splurging on the recent hongkong shopping trip, so thinking of going to bintan chalet, or maybe tioman island for some snorkelling! i really liked tioman, the last time i was there in sec 3 or 4 with my RINPCC friends it was super fun, i think about 20 of us went, along with our teacher and edward's aunt. 2 adults to 18 kids, i think it must have been difficult for them to take care of so many of us! but well, being in sec 3 or 4, i don't think we were that difficult to handle! haha!

i know october is like, what, almost 2 months away but i like to plan my holidays early to get the best deals and spend time getting to know the place a little better n estimate how much i should bring to spend. i hope they have jet ski there too! hahaha.. i love the speed, the wind in my face, n doing those high speed turns! last time i jet ski had an accident, so hope to rid myself of that bad experience! hahaha..

anyway was quite touched n surprised that someone so far away still bothers to sms me n reads my blog as entertainment! haha.. apparently she's getting a beer belly but its alright now, since she's already attached n no longer need to maintain the fishing hooks, or looks! hahaha..

its now 3 pm in the afternoon, what my colleague calls the "sleepy time"! n it really is, from 3-4 pm i usually end up stoned n unproductive in work, turning to blogging or facebooking or youtubing to keep me awake, otherwise i'll really fall asleep in front of the com! =P

after work gonna rent another space marine book, n hopefully plan a bit of lan games if my friends are free.. i can't stand my super slow computer at home with lousy graphics.. i think its time to overhaul my com or get a brand new one, at least when dawn of war 2 comes out i can play it with detailed graphics!

Singing and cycling on national day!

2008-08-12T12:06:00.003+08:00

Perhaps its true what they say, that a picture speaks a thousand words. that a good picture will be able to not only capture the location and the activity, but the feelings n experience of it all. but then again, sometimes only words can truely express what goes on in a person's thoughts n feelings, pictures n videos cannot do what human memory can. So no matter how many photo albums u upload on facebook or friendster, nothing beats a good narration of events. hehz.

Anyway enough rambling, just wanted to blog about the amazing weekend i just had, eventhough the photos are already up on facebook, the SF ktv, the ktv with Maurice n Qianyun, the night cycling with millie Ian n Lax, among various other misc pics. I realise pple will either blog or upload photo albums, but very seldom do pple do both. Haha. i guess its just too troublesome.

Friday night cg was at a very weird place where we played some very childish games (haha) n sat on chairs for cg. quite a short message n Joan n i rushed down to chomp chomp for a quick dinner of chicken wings n hokkein mee before going for KTV at this broken down looking place called K-Garden or something. so out of the way, n the sound system isn't very good. but oh well, at least it was only about $13 per person, not too ex but only 1 drink each. we sang until about 2 am, then went for supper at the indian stall. i think i've found my favourite duet partner in Millie, n somehow we sound quite good in the songs we sing together! Now, my gf shouldn't get jealous cos after all its just singing songs right? Haha.. Not as if I will actually like millie in that way.. hehz. Oh wait, i did a few years back, but thats history now. Haha! but anyway i sang a couple of duets with millie n ian, a few songs with desmond n i think haosan, n a few of my all time favourites, one night in beijing, etc. overall not bad lah, i think i sang at least a dozen songs? and in a room of about 13-15 pple, i think thats quite alright lah! haha.. well, we only reached at about 11 n sang for 3 hours max, so it felt a bit short but totally enjoyable. Boon can sing quite well too, although mostly old school chinese songs! hahaha..

On the morning of 9 August i was a bit pissed off cos supposed to go jogging n both joan n mikki didn't turn up, joan was sick n mikki was sleeping away, i should've called before i left the house instead of when i was on the bus there! so went home n slept till 12 noon. later joan came over n i showed her some Mambo moves before going for 2nd KTV session with Maurice n Qianyun, all the way from 3-7 pm, then went to squeeze with the crowd at marine square to see fireworks (which wasn't all that impressive this year, despite the new sparkling ones n the "S" shaped fireworks) n dinner with KFC. to my surprise the new varitey meal is actually quite worth it, filling n tasty, so i think i'll eat at kfc for a few more times while this offer is ongoing. haha! Joan is simply amazing, she can walk into the most crowded place n just find an empty seat. her expectancy at finding seats, or hailing taxis, or finding ATMs or whatever, never ceases to amaze me, God must really be blessing whatever she does no matter how small action it may be like finding a seat!

Oh time for lunch , cycling details later.

***

ok back from lunch. stupid client call me at 1 pm during lunch hour, of cos i'm not in office lah. anyway, the night cycling at east coast after sending joan home.

only millie Ian Lax and I went. melissa supposed to join us as well, but she last min didn't want to cycle cos of some problem with her contact lenses or something, n she suggested bowling. i'm like, no way am i taking bus all the way to east coast to do bowling! thats so boring n i can bowl any time lah, throwing money into longkang, waste money leh. not to mention my average of 140 points will put everyone to shame. hahaha! =P but anyway, our cycling route was from east coast to an unknown dark road, then back out to east coast cos the dark road led to a dead end (and Ian stubbornly refused to turn back until he went through a hole in the fence n came to a "deader" end of grassland! hahaha) then from there to the kallang bridge at the SIS, then across nicole highway, thru suntec, to the 7-11 at marina square for a drink, to the singapore flyer, then back to the chalet again. actually was hoping to meet some of bk's cycling gang, they used to gather at the 7-11 at marina square every friday night around 12 midnight, then they'd cycle to mount faber or some other slopes n do some stunts. but anyway we took a lot of pictures, some turned out really black, but a few were quite nice! hahaha.. the funny part i remember was when we thought we saw ghosts in the dark road n millie screamed! actually it was a couple of guys probably golfers, who were doing God-knows-what in the middle of the night in such a dark place. pretty scary, imagine total darkness n then u see a few shadows moving towards you! hahaha.. it was really so dark, the only source of light was from Ian's bicycle lighting up the path in front. quite exciting. the rest of the trip was quite normal, taking photos on the kallang bridge n exploring the singapore flyer toilet. hahaha. the toilet is actually air conditioned! amazingly cold in the toilet compared to the night air. oh yeah, n on the way back we did the NDP bicycle formation! cycle in one stright line, then 3,2,1 disperse! like how the air craft displays do it at the NDP! it was damn lame n funny lah! hahaha..! formation 2! cycle in a sqaure! cycle in a triangle! whatever!! hahaha..

by the time we reach back to millie's friend's chalet, it was about 4 am. we sat around n talked for awhile, then took cab home, me with millie, melissa n another guy who works at prego. can't recall his name, but he kept talking about his prego job in the cab when i wanted to sleep. -_- anyway it was quite fun n exercising my muscles made them ache until monday, but it still felt shoik to be exercising again! i don't get much exercise sitting in an office all thru the week, n exercise actually rejuvenates the body n energises it. at least before i fell sick with flu on sunday afternoon! kept sneezing n sniffling at church n missed MTT cos of my runny nose n i couldn't stand it, very irritaing not being able to breathe properly. wanted to take MC on monday, but then again my boss is very "ngeow" n particular about pple taking MCs, so decided to just go to work n sneeze my way through the day.

i really enjoyed the weekend, it felt great doing the stuff i love to do, n spending time with my girlfriend n other good friends, it felt as if i didn't have a care in the world, to enjoy myself to the max even if its just for a short period of time n the consequence of over-exhausting my body came in the form of flu n headaceh on monday! but still it was worth it. thanks, God, for an enjoyable weekend, with Your people, people i can trust n seek counsel from, whom i know will not lead me away from You, but will draw me closer to You, even as we do "non-christian" normal activites! =p

Jamming session and hanging out with the SF pple

2008-08-07T11:10:00.002+08:00

Yeah today boss is not in (secretary says she will come in at 7 pm, but then again whats the point of coming to work so late unless there's some super important things to settle) so we're all pretty slack in the morning. puikwan is surfing net for holiday resoirts in bali, i'm updating facebook and doing a bit of work, only the new guy seems on the ball n doing research or something. haha!

Spent last night helping millie to set up her drum kit together with Ian n my brother. Yiwen also came a little later on to join us for supper. It wasn't really fruitful, cos the snare stand was missing, n with the super thick drum pads, its either super soft or super loud when we remove the pads. we were just chilling, playing a few songs here n there while millie was showing her photos of when she was young, photos of her n jeremy, photos of her cell group members, etc. actually Ian said Sharlyn absolutely hates Jeremy, not just becos what he did to Millie, but she really dislikes him for some other stuff that happened, n even boon doesn't like Jeremy. hahaha, all Jeremys cannot make it man. even that guy who was chasing Amanda, then in the end when they were discussing with CGLs, he said he felt he wasn't ready for relationship n backed out. I mean come on lah, you should've thought about it before you started chasing her? how typical of guys to act first and think later. hahaha.

anyway had a great time just talking n chilling out with the SF guys at macdonalds, my bro helped me bring the guiatrs home, cos he needed to work on some editing for some wedding so didn't join us for supper. but anyway we were talking about SF pple, nic n shona, sharlyn n ivan, lingling n ian, hahaha.. it was really very funny. ian was also telling me some stuff about his BGRs n complaining that girls are all materialistic. hahaha! guys go for looks, girls go for the money. isn't being superficial the same as materialistic? so guys n girls are equally appalling? hahaha.. anyway we left the place around 11.15 to go home n ian n millie was talking about having a chalet together to celebrate their birthdays! soooo sweet right? haha! yiwen n i were like suaning them for that. if Ian n millie do end up together (through some sort of miracle) i really do think they make a good looking n friendly n hyper active n loud couple! haha..

but honestly, i don't find such good friends in cell group anymore. at least in my previous cg, N280, i could hang out with the girls who liked ktv n singing, or hang with the guys who're into computer gaming, paintball, n other guy stuff. in this new cg, W something, i don't even know what the pple are into. nobody makes any effort to meet up with us during weekdays, not even a sms or call from them, until cg or service. same problem that Ian has with his cg too. they have their own cliques n joan n i just don't fit in. n they wonder why soohuei n qingni n grace don't feel like part of the cell. they wanna be cell leaders and everything, but to me spiritual things n biblical knowledge go hand in hand with natural relationship. n seriously if u can't establish relationship with pple, how do u lead them?

which leads me to another conclusion which i've suspected all along but gave the benefit of doubt to those pple until recently, just becos you go to SOT doesn't mean you become more spiritual or anything changes in your life. sure there are those that go on to start churches n become leaders in church, but there are those who eventually backslide, or worse, totally no change in their character or lifestyle. all these pple become is more puffed up with knowledge n have this "i went thru SOT u know" kind of smugness. yeah, so i really wonder, these SOT students, how many friends have they personally brought to church in the past few years? how many lives have they impacted on a deep level (other than other SOT students)? how many friends do they have outside of church? how is their work and status in the marketplace? how is their relationship with their family members?

of cos there are those who make everyone else look bad, those mr perfect kind, cell leader, sucessful businessman with happy family, etc. the kind that everyone looks up to. but how many more just go through SOT like another few months in school? oh and the 2 year SOT course has been shortened to an embarrassingly short 4 months. just see the quality of the older batches of SOT graduates compared with the last 2 years, and the difference is painfully unmistakably obvious.

and why am i so upset over all this? heck pple will say i have no right to say anything becos i've not even gone through SOT, or i'm not spiritual enough to make sensible judgement. truth is, i WANTED to go to SOT a few years ago, i was planning to finish my NUS studies, then go to 1 year of SOT, then enter the workplace fully equipped with the Word of God to apply in the marketplace. i wanted to be a CGL who cared for his members, who isn't so concerned about growth as the lives of his members. many CGLs keep asking for new friends every week when their members don't even feel like part of the cell group, then whats the use? when i was a normal member, i prayed one hour everyday on average a few years ago, i read the Bible twice through in a year, n i brought like 10 friends to church each year. when i wanted to be a CGL, things changed, i got more busy, less time for God, more time spent on admin n collecting forecasts, more discipleship classes, more church meetings to attend, etc.

i think i'd rather be a normal member with time to pray n worship God, with good friends in and outside of church, who is able to do well in my job without compromising on my values, to excel in my ministry being led by a leader with big dreams and visions so amazing i'm blown away by his leadership, n to have good relationship with my family n my beloved Joan.

am i settling for less? am i becoming mediocre? am i becoming lazy and doing less things for God? perhaps not. if i live my life for God every single day, isn't that enough for Him? God delights in the prosperity of His servants. Seek first the kingdom of God and all will be given unto you. you know what? i don't feel that i'm living a mediocre life anymore. i used to think that being a CGL is the ultimate calling for all christians, that if i don't become a CGL at least once in my christian life then i've failed my duty as a christian. how wrong was I! hahaha..

What a happening weekend!

2008-08-04T09:52:00.002+08:00

Totally exhausted after a week of activities.. From work to ministry to FOP and company dinners, I think last week was pretty good.

Managed to finish one major piece of work, well not really finished, I still need to go through it again today to do spellchecks and the proof reading, but mostly done up. So actually a lot of my work has been cleared and this week should be a slower pace of work, which will do nicely since I'm quite tired. I dunno whats wrong with my sleeping habits cos I always wake up automatically about 7 am everyday, even during the weekends. Almost as if an internal body clock is forcing me to wake up for work even if I don't have to go office!

but anyway friday night's company dinner with the interns, wincen n the new guy wasn't too bad, the food was good, but i think joan felt a little left out n honestly i thought it was pretty weird n awkward, i felt that the pple didn't really wanna talk to each other or something, which is quite different from when puikwan n i talk to them individually. i guess some pple are shy in front of a group of pple or something. but anyway had a big quarrel with joan that day cos i was feeling unwell and she was unwell too (which i found out only the next day cos she didn't even tell me) and she was demanding that i spend more time with her even though i was dead tired after work n the company dinner, so i wanted to send her back in a cab but she refused. anyway to cut a long story short, we had an arguement that led to some uncalled for comments, which really made both of us upset, but eventually we talked it out n everything seemed back to normal on saturday morning at least. yup, so for those who're wondering why the sudden changes to my facebook status, now you know. yes, i can get pretty emotional n do irrational things when i'm worked up, i'm human to n i'm prone to do stupid things, even as a Christian.

speaking of which, sat FOP was quite good, managed to meet sebastian at plaza sing bus stop after our movie (the dragon emporer, which was quite a silly movie with lousy special effects, bad acting, bad storyline, and even worse lines from the ang mohs trying to speak chinese, i actually LOLed in the cinema) n we took a cab to SIS from plaza sing. Its ridiculous, the journey was like, 10 min or less, and the cab fare was $12. I mean, i could go from my house to town last time n it was even cheaper. i travel from yck to expo n its $12! the ERP n extra cab charges are getting too pricey man. but anyway i digress, the FOP event this year had less pple, no queue at all when we reached SIS, n somehow meet sansan alicia ziqian n company, apparently we all reached at the same time (roughly 7 pm, although hanning did tell me they were meeting at 6 pm but she herself was late! haha!). honestly i saw little point in fop cos honestly how many pple from other churches were there? when pst derrick came out, everybody cheered, n every comment the other pastors said, there were some cheers here n there. who else can be so overly enthu n excited? anyway joan thought the parachute was too punk, but i thought they were so-so only, not exactly creating a diff kind of sound like delirious? did, merely copying from other christian n secular bands. the vocalist wasn't fantastic either n he looked like a maori (they're from new zealand btw), can't reall reach high notes. i think even CCC's youth band with daniel n joseph pringle was better, honestly. the hillsongs team was much better, but their bass guitar was way too loud, the speakers were bursting. bad sound makes for a bad experience, but thankfully most of the songs the bass player tried to tone down the playing. mark conner's preaching was quite interesting n funny too. after FOP we went to my house for supper, bak chor mee, n watched Punisher, which was quite draggy, n i sent Joan home around 2.30 am or so. by the time i reached home n bathed, it was like 3 plus already, but its ok cos sun we could sleep late.

n i woke up at 11.54 am on sunday! wow! slept like close to 9 hours lah! shoik man, after always struggling to wake up early for service on sunday ( i don't think i ever took public transport for JW service, maybe once or twice?) it felt good having a relaxing time, chilling with SF pple at woodlands KFC, then chilling out somemore at the NDP tentage area, joan n i really have a lot of fun with the SF pple, n its not just practicing n playing n performing, we usually talk about lots of other things, joke around n pair pple up, exchange tips on drumming n various other things, army stories, movies, etc.. just like family. well i have to admit, the intro sequence was quite badly done, especially the rock beat while moving, n rohan ended one bar late, which was quite bad n boon scolded us all after that. for myself, i've never played jam block with my hands so high up before n it kept slipping from my fingers. but even if i did raise my hands up all the way, i doubt many were actually watching me hit the jam block, n many simply forgot the rock beat or the 16 dance transition, which is quite frustrating for boon, i can understand.

but thankfully flightphesy (with 6 snares n 1 rapanik carried by yuhong) sounded pretty tight, n the new gimmick with prophesy went smoothly n nobody forgot anyting, except rohans part during the march, which was very funny, it happens like 50% of the time when we play flightphesy, either neo or whoever forgets to play that part! the crowd wasn't very engaging either, probably more concerned about eating their dinner (i think there were probably around 50 tables or so? quite a large number of woodlands pple) than watching the performances, but it doesn't matter cos we're still doing our best. the FHW was not too good, over all playing sounded tight, but volume went soft at certain parts, n we sped up n slowed down again at the usual parts, but at least it was together! the double UDM had no light, but other than that i think everything went smoothly, joan was dragged by boon to play in the nearer to the players of which she was quite stunned by boon pull her shirt to move her to the center of the players, i think the expression on her face must have been super funny! hahaha.. oh n she banned me from talking to LT for the day cos she says i'm always flirting with her! hahaha! oh man, she's like wat, 6 years younger than me leh! n she has too many guys chasing her liao, she doesn't need another one, hahaha.. noticed the usual players didn't play, lingling, chaokiat, rallen, julia, but still i think it was pretty alright, just that would've been better if we had 2-3 more support players. n another pseudo instead of rapanik! yuhong so big size carry the small rapanik, look like cartoon man! but an achievement is that joan finally managed to learn the whole FHW, albeit at a slower speed, but at least with some practice, she can replace me liao n i don't have to bring extra clothes or get wet or foot rot after playing UDM! hahaha.. just realised we've been playing for SF gigs 3 weekends in a row! no wonder i'm getting foot rot..

but today joan's getting her exams results n i'm very worried for her. i couldn't sleep properly (n probably neither could she) thinking about the possibilities n consequences. woke up this morning feeling as if i didn't sleep at all thru the night, which of cos is impossible. but my eyes feel pretty heavy, n i'm not in a condition to do any work, my arms n legs are aching whcih is kind of weird, why would my legs ache when my arms do the drumming? hahaha..

what an exhausting weekend! tonight meeting yishan n company, terence going army soon, n tml meeting bernard to buy insurance, then meeting janice for supper.. honestly i feel like cancelling on janice cos i think i'll be too tired to travel so much n stay out so late on a weeknight. i'll sms her n see if she can meet another time instead lor.. really so tired i dozed off twice just typing this! i know i know, slacking at office again.. but really no mood to work. wish i can take a few days off, just to really relax n go to the beach n enjoy a good time drinking ice cold drinks n watchin the sun set with joan.. will probably do that sometime next month. planning to join the function room for NDP countdown this saturday, haha..

i miss my JC friends, n N280 friends, n my other girl friends too. i mean yeah im attached so i can't meet them anymore, n we're all so busy with work n our own lives, its so hard to find time to meet up with friends these days.. n this year, NDP is on a saturday, not a weekday, sucks big time man.

but just a quick prayer for joan again:

God i pray that you really be with Joan n give her encouragement n strength even as she goes to collect her results, Holy Spirit fill her with joy of the Lord, and peace which surpasses all understanding, that You are with her to support n comfort her, that all things will work for the good of those who love You, that You will be there in such a tangible way, holding her up no matter what the results may be, that You will bless her with good academic results, she will get Bs and Cs and not fail any subject, that she will not have to repeat any module. It may be asking for a miracle, but God is a God of miracles, and surely You can come through for Your favourite daughter this time round, bless her n anoint her, that even in the midst of this, she can shine for You in the school, that her class mates will look up to her n many will be led by her to Christ. Please look after my baby, my sweet cute Joan, I commit her into Your loving hands. I trust You heavenly Father, with our lives, our future, and our relationship in Christ.

In Jesus name,
Amen!

Traffic Jam gig with Chris Daughtry and working over the weekend!

2008-07-28T14:21:00.002+08:00

I can't believe its been a week since I last posted something here! I guess my life is pretty boring n have nothing interesting to blog about. haha..

aside from the balloting of the new flats where we so coincidentally bumped into kenneth n his wife, as well as zhiqian n alicia (hahaha imagine all of us as neighbours! that'll be so weird lah.. seriously weird. anyway i'm ok with zhiqian n alicia hanging out with us cos they're quite fun, but to have your CGL stay next door is like, er, hahaha, no way am i gonna let that happen!) and from the Chris Daughtry Traffic Jam gig (which Ivan proposed to Sharlyn after like, 9 years of being together n it was awww so sweet - pukez) where we played Dhoom agian, 4 min, Larger than Life and of cos to wrap things up FHW!

i dunno man, i'm doing so many things i kind of feel like my weekend isn't meant for resting anymore, but rather to run errands n get my personal things done since the rest of the week i'm spending the bulk of my time slogging it out in office! hahaha.. in fact i feel quite exhausted, no doubt from working through the weekend n exerting soooooo much energy in the performance last night, swinging the tom around n hitting my knees. its still painful n my back hurts a little from all the sudden exercise!

actually i think Ivan is not really the right guy for sharlyn, she's so pretty n nice n spiritual n mature, but oh well as long as she loves him n vice versa, that's their relationship. but i think he's really changing n trying his best to provide for her so yeah, he's alright i guess.

well another thing really made my day last night, but well, i guess i shall not mention it here where various parties may jump to wrong conclusions n the repurcussions that would follow the wrong conclusions would be nothing short of catastrophic. haha! i'll end this post with the song from Hellboy 2 which Ivan so aptly used for the proposal last night..

"you know i can't smile without you
I can't laugh without you
I can't smile
I can't sing
I'm finding it hard to do anything and I
Feel glad when you're glad
Feel sad when you're sad
If you only knew what i feel for you
I just can't smile without you" =)

technically i won't classify this as a love song, it can be like family song, friendship song, or whatever else suitable occasion it can be used.

Cheap thrill but still..!

2008-07-18T17:24:00.002+08:00

Today I set a record for fastest "trip to funan to rent a new book and return with lunch" routine!

Took me just a little over half an hour, left my seat from my office at 12.39 pm to take a MRT to city hall, walk to funan second floor, browse through the book titles n choose an interesting one, rent the book at the cashier n return the old book (cost $4.50 as usual), went to macdonalds to buy a fillet meal, then take MRT back, n i sat down in my chair at about 1.12 pm.

Borrowed "Duty Calls" about Caiphas Cain, the super funny comissioner of the Imperial Guard, always running away from fights, hiding from responsibility, acting cool n humble, when he is actually recognised as a hero in the empire! its a damn entertaining series, he fights tau, orks, tyranide n rebel troops so far, seems to have zero skill but amazing amount of luck and intelligence to get him out of any battle. its really comical, I'd recommend "For The Emperor" to any DOW players who are looking for something interesting to read, with the same bloody battles n action n adventure, BUT with sarcasm, humour, romance and comedy.

Primary School Gathering

2008-07-17T10:45:00.002+08:00

Last night was our Second Primary School Gathering in 2008!

The earlier one was around April where we had dinner at HK cafe at hougang followed by a drink at a pub at Punggol area. Attendence was about 17-18.

Comparatively, last night's outing only had about 10 pple (including my girlfriend Joan was isn't my primary sch friend, hahaha) so it wasn't one of those big outings, but to me I felt it was one of the best.

Who came:

Stephanie Sim - flying to china on friday n then back to australia to continue her studies, she was the main reason why we had the gathering in the first place. i couldn't contact her on tues night so was a bit annoyed, but haha, i should've trusted her that she will turn up. she's still the same, chirpy n talkative n bubbly, but less tomboy. haha! but can't get used to her accent no matter how she speaks it just feels weird.

Weiyi aka Winnie aka Rion - this guy used to be one of the quiet ones back in pri sch, very low profile and a bit on the plump side. now he's this hunky GP teacher in MI, with a low voice n a charming smile. oh man, how pple change! i don't even remember him being good in english class in primary sch, i don't think i talked to him much.

Lishan - class monitress, n a personal good friend during my sec sch n JC days, we were in the same JC, AJC. my pri sch best friend weixiong used to like her last time n he often went over to her house to visit n play with her. haha! she's still quite pretty n kudos to her for always taking time n effort to organise the gatherings over the years!

Junhao - the NTU IT personnel n part time investor, this guy is a subtle joker! he's still a bit shy in talking to crowds n tends to be quiet when we're engaging in group chats, but personally he's a good friend who still bothers to chat with me on msn n sms me once in awhile to ask whats going on in my life. he's damn funny when he's in the joker mood though. haha

Liangfeng aka Jerald - this large guy used to be sarcastic n aloof, always acting cool in pri sch, but now he's much nicer to everyone n he actually took initiative to organise the first outing this year. think he's helping his dad with his business now, n looking to take over in a couple of years.

Yvonne - the fair n short hair Christian girl who's a sunday sch teacher n works at the supreme court (i found out last night!) who was always with Fungus in pri sch. (Fungus apparently is now a really handsome butch with blond hair. I really can't picture that, gives me the creeps!) she has that nice bubbly personality that somehow didn't quite show in pri sch.

Yingyan - the birthday girl last night! we got a delicious chocolate brownie with sugar coated words on it. i loved the brownie, it was so sweet. she's this petite nice hardworking girl if i remember correctly, always very "on" about class outings. i think she was quite good in english also.

Deborah - the tall dark n pretty one in the class, now working in OCBC doing mortgages n charges over property. didn't really talk much to her in pri sch cos she was very "dao" n hung out with net ball girls from other classes, n Kelly n I made fun of her calling her "the bra". haha! but she's quite friendly now, more of those classy sophisticated girls, so i guess a remnant of her "dao"ness remains, manifested in another aspect.

Shujun - another quiet girl whom i didn't really talk much to in pri sch cos she was sitting at the other end of the class. she's now quite pretty compared to last time, n is now the official photographer of our class outings. still don't know her well, despite her being lishan's closer friend.

Jacob "biscuit" aka Dr Chee Soon Juan lookalike - this guy sat in front of me in class next to yong weiwei (whom i used to like in pri 6, yes yes i know, so childish right? hahaha) so i was pretty envious of him since the girl treated him quite well but treated me like i was some lowlife scum, despite of how nice i was being to her. haha! he's quite a weird guy, who makes comments that somehow doesn't quite flow with other pple, but i suppose he's alright n can take a joke (its usually on him! haha)

Basically these were the pple who turned up last night. We had a nice dinner at Cafe Cartel (although the hawaiian pork chop was sold out, much to the annoyance of some of them) followed by a walk to esplandade to celebrate yingyan's birthday n take lots of photos with Stephanie before she leaves again. it was really good, or surreal as Winnie puts it, that we can still click n be such good friends despite having not seen each other for long periods of up to 10 over years! I mean, we were all what, 11 and 12 years old (pri 5 and 6A1 class) when we first met n now we're all 26 this year! oh my gosh, its 14 years ago since we graduated from Xinmin pri sch! it really goes to show that old friendships formed are somehow firmer n really stand the test of time n even distance. mukesh, AK, stephanie, Jiayong all went to USA, australia, etc but we still keep in touch ever so often, i think its amazing. Mrs Ng would've been proud of us!

And look at us, all achievers n contributors to society. Teachers, IT specialist, investor, businessman, supreme court accountant, lawyers, doctor (she couldn't make it as she was on duty) and other professions. Thank God for such a great primary school environment and even better friends. You know it may sound silly, but Kelly n a few of us had a pact that we would be friends no matter what happens way back in primary school. And this sunday we're going to his housewarming party. We'll also probably be there to see his first child. This is so exciting isn't it?

Life span of a human is about 70-80 years. If we can maintain this friendship until our last breath, we would've been friends for at least 60 years, longer than we've known our partners, husbands, wives or church friends or colleagues or whatever. Its something special, the bond that was formed way back then that lasted till today. =)

Part 2 of the Blazing Angels

2008-07-15T14:46:00.002+08:00

Private Silverthorn screamed in rage and pain as a tyranid pierced his right calf, and brought down the small knife he held in both hands with his full strength, plunging it into the head of the alien repeatedly until it was dead. Without missing a beat, he reloaded his rifle and let loose a few more shoots at the approaching tyranid, each bullet blowing apart a creature's head or torso. But still they came.

"Silverthorne! We've got to keep moving!" yelled another scout, Private Eduardo, as he grabbed the collar of Silverthorne's combat fatigues with one hand and fired his pistol in the other. The other two scouts were covering the flanks, one on each side, firing shot after shot at the pack of vicious tyranids.

Despite the terrible pain in his calf, Silverthorne struggled to his feet and supported by Eduardo, ran back to the assault bikes which were parked less than 20 feet from where they were. Somehow, the short distance of 20 feet seemed ridiculously far away to him and he wondered if his injury if he would be able to ride the bike out of harm's way. But it was too late for doubts even as he clambered onto the bike, the other 2 scouts had already gunned the throttle and let loose a final spray of bullets before riding off. Silverthorne wondered how long were they able to hold the swarm off before they were finally overrun, even as his bike sped faster and caught up with the other scouts, the tyranids soon left behind in the dust.

Singapore Band Challenge Semi-finals and 3 Strikeforce Gigs! What a weekend!

2008-07-14T14:57:00.002+08:00

What an awesome weekend! Simply one my best weekends so far in 2008!

First up, the enjoyable performances of the local bands at the Singapore Band Challenge! Though we only caught the last 5-6 bands, almost all the bands which I liked got in! Yeah! Well, there was one band which wasn't really that good but got in anyway, but still the other 6 were totally rocking awesome! Here's the bands that I support that got into semis:

Shoe Size Nine (though I missed their prelim performance, I caught their auditions n thought they were simply great! good old rock music!)

Street Sights (when the announcer said their name, I thought it was street sex! hahaha! these 3 guys sound really good and they have excellent audience engagement, although they didn't have any personal friends or supporters, they really wowed the crowd and the judges. the only reason why they won't win is becos they lack a lead guitarist and some parts sound a bit empty. sure, they sound full for a 3 piece band, but a lead guitar with a bit of rifts would be good.)

Just A Pose (I thought their name was Just a toe, and by the way they're Julia's choice for winning the competition. they did a jason mraz song, and to me, any vocalist who dares to do Jason mraz must either be looking for a deathwish or is a really good singer. it was the later n it really surprised me. they were really tight n crowd engaging as well, although it was not really a song which shows off their music skills, it was very professional.)

Sonafa (this 7 piece band is out of this world, they're really in a league of their own. no other band comes close to this awesome group, with 2 laptops, a weird big flute, a keyoard, a percussionist, a bass n a drmmer. a mixture of rave, dance, new age n funk, they totally blew away the competition. the only minus point, they have no singer. they can realy have their own show, like nigel said. this band alone made the trip down to *scape worth it!)

One more band, i can't remeber the name, had this awesome electric guitar soloist, i think he must be one of the best guitarists in singapore! he looked a little big size for his guitar, but the sound was awesome, his playing superb, no fancy play-with-the-tongue gimmicks, but plenty of soul n attitude in the shredding n playing! I'm not sure of the band's name, maybe Damage Control or something.

ANyway all of these bands made it to the semi finals, and I'm definitely going to catch them perform! I was really inspired to take part in the competition next year! Now all I need to do is form a band, hahahah.. my brother eletric lead, me on keyboard or rythm guitar. I need a bass n a drummer n a good singer. Anyone care to join? ?? Hahaha...

But seriously what nigel said is true, there are lots of good musicians at the competition, but very few good vocalists. i think cos all the vocalists are mando-pop super band kind, n thats quite sad for the music scene. so much good music n no singer to sing the lyrics to tell the story of the song!

***

Besides the band challenge, there were 3 gigs we played this weekend, MTV gigs for sat n sun, and one for LTA this morning at about 9.30 am. why was it memorable?

for the sat gig, it was playing UDM in the day time, when i can actually see the audience appreciate the UDM n enjoying the performance. it was exactly one of the best performances, esp the crazy army, which my cowbell REALLY sucks n screwed the ending up a bit, but overall it was good, it attracted attention of the crowd, n we have a lot of fun. Joan was playing, so I'm really happy she can master crazy army, and she played for sunday as well, so proud of her.

sunday gig was flightphesy which there were a few mistakes here n there which were quite funny, but at least the sequence was tighter than saturday, perhaps cos it was easier to play. i was cow bell all the way, and although i didn't play UDM, it felt just as good to be part of the support role, and for ONCE i can see how FHW looks like in a daytime performance! i never realised it but i've never seen FHW being played in day time cos i'm always playing UDM! i don't say this in haughtiness, but a revelation of how long i've been playing for the strikeforce and man oh man, how much i enjoy every single performance (that doesn't suck of cos!) and gig!

this morning's LTA gig was something of a challenge for me. i've never played cymbals for the Mediacorp sequence before, n for me it was stepping out of my comfort zone, n trying something new which to be honest i think i suck at.

the last time i played cymbals, i fell down after jumping off a bin n injured my knee, and worse of all, i almost crushed a girl who was standing in front of me, i leaned to my right so that she won't feel the full impact. Up till this day, I still don't know the name of the girl i fell on, because i was so embarrassed i didn't dare to speak to her.

yeah, so now you know why i fear the cymbals. i hurt someone n i fell down looking stupid. oh, n another reason is that the standard of cymbal players is pegged at arthur. who does push ups on the road after marching for 3 km, who kicks the cymbals in the air with splits, and who is good looking to boot. how do i match up to a standard like that? i simply can't.

but today i tried. i wasn't exactly happy with my performance, but i want to see it on video too, to see how i look playing the cymbals. honestly, playing cymbals is a lot of fun n strenous on the muscles, n a lot of dancing n body movement is involved. i admit, i do like of like it! really.. but after the fall, i never did have the courage to play cymbals for more than a year.. until today.

thank God for giving me the strength n courage to do it. nobody knows of cos, my fear of the cymbals, nobody except God. but i got through the gig with no injuries, n i hope i did well. haha.