My first weekend at work

I've always considered myself very blessed to be working in this firm where I leave around 7.30 pm every night. My friends and other lawyers I know work kind of crazy hours, like until 9 or 10 pm or even occasionally until 2 or 3 am. So I thought, wow I'm in a good firm which almost has working hours of a 9-5 job, which isn't too bad. I mean, during pupilage, I could even leave office at about 6 pm on some days. Which still left a night life for me to enjoy.

But I guess expectations are higher when I am a real hired lawyer. I'm expected to do all sorts of work, in short amount of time, and if I have to work weekends, I've got no choice. And whats worse is that I know even if I come to a point where I can't take it, I can't quit because no other place has similar or better working hours than here, from what I know. So I guess this is a lawyer's life right? I choose this path so there must be some reason why I'm doing what I'm doing.

True, when my boss is on leave or at meetings is when I get to slack a bit, go home on time n even go clubbing on weeknights if I have the energy and the mood. And when my boss is in a good mood, she brings us to lunch and is generally quite a nice person, outside of work.

But today I dunno why I really have no motivation or mood to do any work since after lunch. I've got contracts to review, documents to prepare, phone calls to make, but I really just feel like stoning n wasting away the next 1.5 hours or so until 6 pm, then leave promptly and send a message to the bosses - don't touch my weekend. But of cos I know I can't, I'm already preparing which files I need to bring home to work on, n emailed myself a couple of documents.

Oh well, one thing I can look forward to is tomorrow's SF gig and the 14th July gig and the 27th July gig too. Oh, and choir practice on next tuesday night, for range test. Life would be so meaningless without these ministries. I was about to say life would be meaningless without God, but then again, I am living my life without much regard to God in my daily work. I just can't see how God fits into the "real world" where I see politics, backstabbing, unethical behaviour, gossiping, etc. And on a larger scale, I see why the rich get richer and the poor get poorer. There's just too many factors that enable the rich to get richer. Of cos it comes at a price too, probably the price of a healthy family life, or a social life.

I haven't met my friends for weeks, everyday its just work work, go home eat dinner, rest awhile, catch Friends on TV, then go to bed. I'm too tired to even go for a jog with clarence nowadays. Think I'll go cycling tonight, maybe ask BK if he's keen.

Time's now 5.55 pm. I think I will leave around 6.30 pm and take mrt.