Tuesday, November 21, 2006

I'm so pissed off! What the heck..

Dear God

i'm still pissed off. i don't think threatening pple is a method which a leader should use. i feel like changing cell group cos i don't like shaun. plain n simple. i just can't follow a leader who uses methods like this. n forces pple to memorise the bible verses without asking them if they want to take part. i'm clearly pissed off with michelle fong as well, for being such an idiot to call shaun n tell him dunno what things in a stupid way, no tact at all.

i really feel like scolding them a whole lot of vulgarities, but then shaun would only send me for more counselling n michelle won't even understand them, being a complete brainless numbskull.

thats it i've had it with pple giving me orders on how to live my life, on what i should n shouldn't do. what the hell. where's the freedom that God has given us? since He gives us a choice on everything n its up to us to exercise that choice, then what right does anyone have to force us to do something? u tell me, u're a cell group leader, ordained by God to direct us n lead us. well, excuse me, a true leader leads by inspiring or encouraging others, or teaching them to do the right things, not force them to do it simply becos its right.

God i don't remember You scolding pple or threatening them for their ignorance. i didn't know there were any new friends. i didn't tell the guys not to go for the basketball thing. i didn't think that since i don't like it i won't go. in that case i won't go for any of the prayer meetings, i won't go for any of the discipleship lesson, i won't go for any churchwide prayer meetings liao. i will be completely honest, i'm not mr spiritual. i don't like certain things but i still go for them becos its the right thing to do. and i remember, i will move from desire to discipline to delight. if only i get past the discipline part.. which i do not mean other pple can discipline me in whatever way they wish, or threaten or yell or scold or whatever.

yeah its true diff pple got diff ways of dealing with issues. i've no problem with that, their style is their own choice. but its not my choice.

i've really had enough. i want to get out of this cell group. i dislike many pple in it. i've slogged my butt off for the friends in the cell group. i was there when pple were in hospital, driven pple to doctors, paid for hp bills, accompanied them to study, shown them the love of Christ, taught them in the best way i know how while still remaining as a friend.

but while the pple actually show their gratitude, i don't see any leaders showing their gratitude, simply becos they think its our duty as mature christians to do what we do without any reward. becos everything we do is so spiritual.], we'll get our rewards in heaven, n the unperishable crown should be the only thing we desire isn't it?

sorry, i'm not so spiritual yet.

and by the way things are going, i don't want to be. God i've no problem knowing, loving n serving You, but its Your pple that are giving me a bad time n a bad experience.

i'll try one last time to go with the flow of the cell group, by the end of the year, if i have one more conflict with shaun, i'm requesting for a transfer out.

in Jesus name,
Amen.

Monday, November 13, 2006

End of Days - Enter the Shinigami!

After days of fighting off hordes of zombies and giants monster lizards, the supplies in the Titanium building were running low. The teams' rescue operations were going on a higher frequencies, and many more pple were rescued from the destruction and debri of the "end of days" phenomenon, but countless others were turned into the walking undead. General Kevin's battalion battled fervently against the monsters and managed to eliminate a substantial portion of the vermin, but more gateways opened and hell's assault on the earth did not seem to shimmer down in any way but instead grew fiercer and more frequent by the day. Portals opened every hour in every part of Singapore, hell hounds spewed out with accompanying doom guards, monsters and various other forsaken creatures. Grifter and Wolfwood decide that constant defensive measures would do little other than delay the inevitable overwhelming of the stronghold. Already the teams were running out of ammunition and physical energy, morale was running low as CNN and the internet reports of major cities being almost totally destroyed by the nuclear fall out as the WMDs fell merely weeks ago. They weren't expecting any help from the UN or anyone, they had to fend for themselves while the rest of the world struggled to survive as well.

Meanwhile, the Morning Star plotted against the rest of mankind, with only one goal in his mind: death and an eternity of suffering for all.

*******

"Time for a change of plans!" Wolfwood announced as the whole team of fighters and rescue workers gathered in cafe at the fourth floor.

"We've decided that holding the fort and defending it every single minute is a waste of effort and ammunition. We've decided to move every single person we've left alive to Pulau Tekong. There's plenty of room for thousands of survivors, and the island is inaccessible except for boats. General Kevin has already shifted the remaining forces that he has onto the island to clear any inhuman life forms, and Grifter and his elite team have rushed there to assist him in the remaining 4 Mech Warriors that we have left."

A murmur of comments. Wolfwood waited for silence.

"Alright everyone inform the rest in the various places of the building. Divide the survivors into groups of 30. About 4-5 of us will bring each group towards Tuas shipyard, where there will be boats waiting to bring the survivors to Pulau Tekong.."

Bourne Kiatz mumbled, "Haven't even been thru NS, but have to go to Tekong already! Sian man!"

Mikki shot him an annoyed glance. She couldn't believe that this guy was her knight in shining armour just a few weeks before. Now he was behaving like a baboon and monkeying around when everyone else was working furtively for survival. Oh well, at least he could be depended upon for he had a seemingly endless supply of energy, especially to conduct recon missions on his bicycle.

*******

Meanwhile, Grifter and his companions were facing little resistance as they surged ahead of General Kevin's forces. Captain Daryl's bombers had already cleared the path, and only a few zombified tekong soldiers remained to be shot down for the place to become a safe haven. Or so, they thought.

Grifter and his trusty sniper Turtle Teo emerged to a clearing in the jungle, where a portal suddenly appeared!

"Heads up! We've got company!" Grifter yelled into the intercom.

Immediately Clarence and Kenneth, the Chan brothers emerged from the jungle as well, weapons aimed at the portal, prepared for anything, while the other 2 Mech Warriors with George and Jeremiah in one, and Kenneth Cole and Commando Sashi in the other, rambled towards the portal at full speed.

2 fighter Apaches headed in the direction, one piloted by Lieutenant Jaric, and the other by Sergeant Kelvin. Captain Daryl maintained his watch from the Black Hawk high above the action.

Suddenly, a huge fist emerged from the portal and smashed one of the Apaches, sending it flying through the air!

"NOO!! Kelvin!!" Daryl shouted in disbelief.

A huge creature began to emerge from the portal, its face covered a sort of white mask, while the whole creature was unbelievably huge, its foot alone already 3 times the size of the Mech Warrior, and as the whole being came out of the hellish portal, the body was as big as a HDB building, and it towered above the tree tops, its muscular dark green body pulsating with an evil force.

"Oh crap.. this one's gonna be the toughest one to bring down yet!" Grifter muttered, while firing his Mech Warrior's canons and machine guns at the creature, doing absolutely minimal damage. It only served to draw the creature's attention!

With piercing red fiery eyes out of the deathly white mask, two brilliant beams shot out and destroyed the Mech Warrior in one blast!

*KABOOMMM!!!!*

Grifter and Turtle had barely managed to leap out in time, and lay on the ground semi-conscious.

"Oh crap!! Open fire with everything we've got!!" Clarence shouted, as the remaining 3 Mech Warriors poured on the bullets and firepower, Captain Daryl sending for reinforcement aircraft, and General Kevin's tanks finally catching in on the action.

*Boom!! Boom!! RATATAtATATAtttTTT!!!* Sounds of canons and gun fire echoed throughout the forest aimed at the huge monstrousity. Metal shells and casings littered the ground, as piles of spent shells formed mountains of metal.

Though badly wounded, the huge creature cried out in pain and anger and lashed out at a tank, destroying it instantly, while sending another section of soldiers flying in all directions.

Finally Captain Daryl's F-16s arrived with the required firepower to finish off the demon!

"Alright, eat this you freak!!" Daryl launched 2 missiles directly at its head, while the other F-16 launched 2 missiles at its neck, in an attempt to severe its head off!

*Ka-POW!!! BOOM!!* The missiles hit their target dead on, and the mask cracked into pieces, sending the huge creature howling in intense pain, before collasping to the ground!

"Damn that was close!!" Kenneth Cole wiped his sweat from his forehead.

Grifter and Turtle Teo began to stir and get up from the muddy ground, when something else began to come out from the portal!

Ken Chan pointed at the portal and yelled out in panic, "Oh no! More of those things coming out!!"

Indeed, another giant demon stepped out from the portal, observing its fallen comrade, gave a roar of anguish and move a sweeping motion with its arm, and several more giant demons began to pour out of the portal, which had grown in size to about the size of Expo!

This is the end, thought Grifter.

Soldiers, eyes wide open in fear began running away, tanks rolled backwards, and the Kenneth Cole helped Grifter and Turtle onto the remaining Mech Warriors to escape, while George and Jeremiah continued firing medium caliber bullets and even anti-tank missiles to try to stop the monnsters, to little effect.

"First Restraint Obstruction! Destructive Art 4: Blast of White Lightning!!" A commanding female voice cried out and suddenly a flash of lightning dazzled Grifter and attacked the nearest demon!

"Who can that be?? What's going on??" Grifter wondered.

"Souten Ni Zase!! Hyourinmaru Ice Ring, roar!!" Suddenly the surrounding temperature seemed to drop several degrees and icicles appeared on the trees, before a loud metallic cracking sound filled the air as a light blue ice dragon roared and seemed to attack and destroy one of the demons! Wickedly sharp Ice shards flew everywhere, piercing the surrounding demons, even as the ice dragon penetrated and froze one of them!

Clarence and Ken Chan both uttered in complete shock, "What the !@#$!!"

"Zabimaru Hoero, howl!!" A demon's leg was sliced off and its lower torso was ripped apart by a jagged blade-like whip, as a shadow with red hair darted around at breakneck speed! Greenish blood splattered across the canopy as soldiers scrambled for safety.

"this is getting too bizarre!" Turtle shook his head to clear his mind, not able to comprehend what he was seeing!

The remaining demons seeing that they could not fight off these new assaults and combatants, decided to return to the portal, and closed the eerie portal behind them!

Grifter wondered who these new friends or foes were, and how on earth did they have such astonishing powers, when a small kid with white spikey hair about one head shorter than him sort of landed in front of him! dressed in a white robe, carrying a samurai sword no less.

"You've got to get out of here before more of them show up!" The boy spoke with authority despite his youthful appearence.

"Wait a minute! Who're you? What're those things??" Jeremiah asked in bewilderment.

"I'm Hitsugaya Toushirou, a Shinigami Taichou! Or in english, a death god captain! My mission is to get humans to safety and eliminate the threat of the Menos!" the boy explained.

"Huh??" george apparently could not understand what the boy was saying, as he did not watch the popular Bleach anime series. (haha!)

The young boy smacked his palm against his forehead. "Why are humans always so difficult to deal with??"

"Come, let me explain." An elegant and beautiful but vertically challenged girl in a black robe began to lead the people away while explaining more. "The Menos are giant Hollows. Sort of like demons or ghosts in your terms. Something's happening on a really large level, we don't know how they got such a power boost, they're appearing everywhere in earth suddenly in the last 24 hours!"

Grifter interrupted, "What do you mean the last 24 hours? We've been fighting monstrousities for the past 3 weeks!! Ever since that day, the power surge in the earth's core, the unexplainable burst of energy that caused every electrical equipment on earth to malfunction and launched every nuclear missile on the face of the earth, all sorts of monsters have been appearing, but this is the first time we've encountered something so big!!"

"You mean that other gateways and portals have opened as well?" The girl asked.

"Yes! aren't you death gods supposed to be gods and actually know what is happening??" Ken Chan asked irritatedly.

"Well we aren't really gods, we're more like angels to humans, guardians over them. We're in one division of heaven while, micheal and the other angels are in the other division. We take care of the Hollows and Menos while Micheal and the others take care of the lesser devils and demons." The red hair dude finally spoke up after examining the green blood on the ground. "But things seem to spiral out of control just a few days ago, when news of one of our captains defaulted and betrayed us, to join the Menos and their ultimate leader Satan!"

The white hair boy's faced turned dark and serious. "That Aizen! I'll never forgive him for betraying heaven and soul society! He's almost as bad as Lucifer himself, plotting the massacre of heaven's angels and taking 2 other devoted captains with him!"

Grifter tried to piece everything together. "Ok, so what you're saying now is that one of your angel captains Aizen has fallen to join the Menos and Satan and 2 of the other captains decided to leave with him as well? Perhaps that explains the power surge that we felt within the earth's core a few weeks ago which caused all of this destruction! Hitsugaya, didn't you say that the betrayal took place only yesterday? This all begins to make sense now, except for the timeline!"

"But wait, it does make sense even given the different time frames! Remember, time in heaven is for eternity, which is different what you humans experience on earth! A day could pass in heaven and months or years could have passed on earth! Plus, your deduction of the betrayal leading to shifts in the balance of power affecting earthly as well as heavenly beings makes sense.. You're brilliant, more brilliant than our technological captin Mayuri! And furthermore... I sense that you have great power hidden within you.. Your human reiatsu is much more than a normal person's!! Are you the leader of the human survivors?" Hitsugaya questioned.

Grifter was silent. Then he answered, "No i'm not the leader, there're many other leaders back in the church! We've got to warned them of the Hollows attacking! We initially planned to bring them to this island, but it appears that it isn't safe..."

"Actually it is. After the Menos close a gateway, they can't open it in the same area for a long time, because the spiritual energy is used up in the area. So this island should be safe for at least a few years." Renji Abarai advised.

"Great! Let's send the word back to Wolfwood that all's well and going according to plan!" Sashi heaved a sigh of relief at the first piece of good news for the day.

*******

Flash back. A few years ago.

"Grifter.. You must remember that no matter what happens, you must never unsheath this sword.. it was something your father wanted you to have, but he warned me never to unsheath it and to tell you that it will determine your destiny.."

"Mum! Don't talk nonsense lah! Its a cool sword, but anyway the blade is stuck in the sheath! I've tried pulling it out but somehow its stuck there... anyway I don't really care as long as it looks cool on my room wall!"

"Sigh... Alright. But don't try to unsheath it, perhaps its a valuable piece of historical artefact and it can't be exposed to air or it will rust.. anyway keep it with you all the time alright?"

"Yeah yeah... how did Dad get this sword anyway? Its really heavy.. and it has Japanese inscriptions on its sheath, I wonder what does it say.."

"Its a long story... You gotta rush off for your school, we'll talk about it another day ok?"

"Alright mum.. bye!"

*******

"Oh my gosh." Grifter mumbled to himself in revelation. The sword. His sword passed from his father. It looked exactly like the one Hitsugaya was holding.

Friday, November 10, 2006

Back from Phuket!

Dear Lord,

Its been a long time since i last blogged/prayed here, so an old friend was just complaining about me not blogging anymore, so i supposed i can do my prayer time here today instead of in my room. haha.

God, its been such an amazing past 2-3 weeks. one of the most enjoyable trips i ever had in a long time came in the midst of serving You in the marketplace! how does the strikeforce bring Christianity into the market place? simple. first we bring life n excitement into the place, impact the people, n get them talking about this great bunch of energetic lively creative people. second, we influence them further, get into their lives in a greater way. finally we announce we're Christian n show them what is Kristos Kai Kosmos, Christ in Culture!

No more of that old religious nonsense about Christianity being a boring n dull religion! No way man! Our God is an awesome God, He deserves way more credit than what the religious pple give to Him! Thank You God for showing Yourself in a powerful way at Phuket! somehow in the midst of the anxiety n "kan cheong"ness of the first night, we didn't pray before we performed n somehow, i suppose that led to the many mistakes, especially those made by me. oh God i felt like i humiliated You, that i let down Bro Boon n the strikeforce! i admit my playing really sucked big time on the first night. i made so many mistakes, it was really unforgiveable. thank God i wasnt' scolded very much. and i know it was my first time playing lead in a major gig, so i really was super anxious n too tense, i couldn't enjoy the whole performance at all! in my mind i was thinking, oh no, whats next?

The second night was so much better. Thank You Lord for being with us when we prayed n guided our hands n broke thru the atmosphere there! somehow or other, the second night was really without a doubt the best night we played! the crowd was ecstatic n kept asking for more! i think the only other performance we had which was more "climax" n exciting was on the final night after the parade!

Tml i'm gonna play lead for the padang gig again! Lord this time, let me really put on a good show, not just to be good in skills n my playing, but in my facial expression, my body language, let the Holy Spirit really take over n let the life of God, the zoe life flow out of my playing so much that everyone will see a difference! Thank You once again for sending me on the Phuket trip, it really was quite enjoyable.. Serving You in this way has been so far one of the most fulfiling.

Now the building fund is coming.. i think i underpledged the amount, Lord. i know i was giving in doubt, even in fear, becos You know the last time i didn't manage to complete the amount. Yet i know in my heart that when i give out of fear or out of doubt, You are not pleased. how can it be a sweet aroma of worship when the offering stinks of fear n lack? No, i gave in a wrong mindset. I pray that during cell group later You will really come into the place n give me the right faith amount to pledge. not something too easy n realistic, but one amount that needs me to exercise my faith to another level.

Now i need to rest, so thank You once again, i enjoyed the jamming session, i enjoy strikeforce so much! this is the best ministry i ever served in n i pray that You make a way for me to excel more in this ministry, so that i can serve better with better skills, more time, more effort n more excellence, n of cos more anointing! thank You Jesus for the strikeforce! bless the leaders like bro Boon n sis Jennifer, they've been working so hard for so long, i'm sorry i might be a bit harsh on them somethings n talk back, but i still love them cos they are my leaders. they are Your leaders, Your chosen ones, so i will respect them for that.

In Jesus name i pray,
Amen!