4 more hours till Switchfoot concert! No mood to work liao! hahaha..

Can't wait for time to pass by! Just merely 4 more hours to go before I rush out of office and change into my concert clothes and meet Christina n Marina at the mrt station! Think Joan wouldn't be too pleased knowing that I'm going for concert with 2 girls, hahaha.. But she's having lunch with some guy today, so that "balances" out. Haha!

Thanks Jessie, for the encouraging email. Things really did get a bit better today, cg members finally returning my SMSes and phone calls. N yeah, of cos I know I do make a positive difference in the lives of the pple around me, its just that I get scolding n make mistakes at work which makes me feel a bit bad. yeah i know, everyone makes mistakes, but the mistakes you make in school are just pen on paper, marks deducted, if you fail something you can retake your exam, or redo a project.

In real life, if you make a mistake, it can costs thousands of dollars to the company. Which means boss will get pissed off with me, which may possibly mean get deep fried by the oil fish. "Chao you yu" if you know what I mean! Hahahaha..

In sch we all had this heck care attitude, cos we know we're smart enough to get thru the module even if we skip all lectures n don't study. Of cos i'm not bragging, but come on man, Rafflesians and NUS students are just smart lah ok? If we're not smart we wouldn't be studying in those schools lah. Haha.. In university I can honestly say I spent most of my time on cell group, ministry, lan gaming, jamming with the band, and etc. I spend maybe like only 10% of normal sch days studying. Exams of cos I will "pia" but other than that, life was RELAK LAH BRUTHER kind of slack. I watched animae n played games n surf youtube n watch movie n spent lots of times dating Joan my beloved (and she still is!) as well as going out with friends. School work wasn't something that I'd worry about.

REAL work however is a whole new matter. I actually dream about what I'm working at while I was sleeping! A simple typo error equals scolding, overlooking details can kill you. Of cos the clients, as dumb lay pple, don't know anything is wrong, but of cos the senior lawyers do. We never had such drafting classes in school, everything was theoretical, nothing was practical. I'm not a very "C" person, I already scanned thru the work, but somehow the boss can still find mistakes.

But oh well, its already 2.09 pm now, less than 4 hours till I zao liao, counting down with my friends for the concert! damn funny, we're like smsing each other every hour counting down.. oh n really happy that i got a long weekend next week! 6-10 Feb holidays! my boss will only be back on the 12th feb, so thats good news for me man! hahaha..

tml cg gonna try out the new song God of Ages, hope my fingers don't get cramped from the fast song! prayer meeting with James n Cheeweng, buying refreshments also, a lot of things to do. Plus Chingay practices coming up, I don't think I'll even have the time or the energy to blog anymore until the CNY holidays. even then, stupid relatives making a lot of noise n stupid superstitious pple will make noise n stupid comments. i really don't like chinese new year gatherings, some uncles n aunties are downright irritating. but i like gatherings also cos i get to see my cousins n catch up with them, so quite meaningful also lah. ok enough crapping, time to get back to work.

Thanks God, for seeing me through everything this week.

PASSED PLC EXAM!!!!!

THANK GOD I PASSED MY PLC EXAMS!!! WHEEE!!!

I was like, oh man, results are gonna be out today at 2 pm and I can't check from my office computer! But for some reason my law friends actually went to help me check and we all passed! Congratulations to all you guys out there, especially Mr Kelvin Ang Fouk Leong, who got into the top 20! Goes to show that all those first class honours pple don't know their stuff when it comes down to the crunch! hahaha..

but seriously without God's help n divine intervention, i probably wouldn't have made it! Thank You Lord for constantly encouraging me n assuring me that I would pass! to be completely honest, the possibility of failing one or two modules actually made me a bit scared, with my career on the line n all, but today God really came thru for me!

Time to go out n party tonight! Oh, and on top of getting the good news, I get paid. $2000, totally no CPF because of my status as a pupil and not an employee! Alright man! Gonna bank in the cheque straight after work and hope to see $2K in my bank by friday morning! Sweet!!

Thank you all those who have been praying for me, supporting me, helping me in my studies, thank you Joan for praying and fasting for my results, and finally once again thank You Lord!!

In Jesus name,
Amen!

had a great weekend!

you know, there's initially 2 things i wanted to blog about. first, we the sort of arguement / fight / whatever you wanna call it disagreement between joan n i on sat night over some trivial issues.. but of cos we quickly kissed n made up. and watched a movie after that too! stupid show called the sinking of Japan where the characters were so bad, the plot was so horrible, the music was so cheesy and the ending was so lame, I actually fell asleep watching the movie! i'm quite surprised cos i almost never ever fall asleep watching movies no matter how bad they are, so that show must be really really bad.. haha! it wasn't even very late, i think like only around 12+ am? anyway, i decided i won't blog about the arguement cos after thinking thru i realise its quite silly. anyway i should add one of my resolutions this year to be more trusting and loving towards Joan.. yes there may be guys who like her n stuff, but i've got to be able to trust her n also trust God that all things work together for the good of those who love Him.

so anyway, sunday was a great day cos we went to yongqiang's new house at chua chu kang to play game after service! hahaha.. service itself wasn't too bad, but honestly though its Dr A R Bernard, i felt it was a pretty ok sermon. not to say that its a bad sermon, of cos its still meaningful n good, but it isn't really something with a punch, you know what i mean? i was a little bit disappointed by the sermon honestly, and i think i know why. it was so obvious that Dr Bernard had a LOT more to say about marketplace ministry BUT due to time contraints, he was forced to condense his message, n in the end it didn't really link and pple were feeling a bit confused and lost. its really a waste cos i remember how awed i was by previous sermons from Dr A R Bernard, but this time, it was almost a casual normal sermon with no revelation(for me at least!) and no effect. its like, just expanding on the marketplace sermon by pastor Kong n the KFC guy. to be completely honest, i have already FORGOTTEN what was it e preaching was about!

not to say i was sleeping or not paying attention. i was trying to write down everything he said! i can remember it was a passage from John, and he was talking about the disciples and how they were market place pple, but i lost the whole essence of the message the moment service ended! disappointing.

then of cos, if i say that, pple will question my spiritual life. have i been praying n reading the Bible n actively seeking revelation? have i become spiritually deaf n overly cynical n cos of that, i can't receive from God? perhaps that is true... i haven't fulfilled my new year resolutions of praying n reading the Word daily. somehow just don't feel like it. like, i'd rather zonk out in front of the TV n stare blankly at whatever crap its showing, than read the Bible for a few minutes.

tonight there's a prayer meeting at riverwalk at 745 pm. i'm like, totally no eager to go at all. pple always say go expecting to receive, go with a willing attitude, go with a desire to pray and intercede for my friends, etc, yes i know all tat. i can quote scripture from the Bible, pray long n complex prayers, do all the right things. but when i have a wrong attitude, what does it matter?

i want to see my friends n family saved becos i want them to go to heaven. becos i believe that God is real and He will save those who confess n repent, and send the rest of the sinners to hell. BUT in spite of my beliefs, i don't really want to do all those spiritual things cos i don't see the value in it.

why?

cos i see more value in relaxing n meeting my own needs. after a hard day of work, i feel i deserve some rest, some enjoyment. going out with friends, catching movies, jamming, listening to music, shopping, playing games, KTV, catching up with old friends, etc.. how about catching up with God? i don't have an answer to that. what can God say to me that will change my life? its already as mundane as it can possibly be. what dreams can God give to me now that i've fulfilled what i dreamt of many years ago? i'm afraid to find out. i'm lazy to find out. i can't be bothered n i'm selfish becos i want to pursue my own desires.

thus comes the eternal debate again. "let Your will be done" in the Lord's prayer. so to do God's will is to sacrifice my own desires n keep doing work for Him? thats wat i've been doing for the past few years. non-stop reaching out, doing things for the cell group, sacrificing my time n money n effort for His kingdom. but did i see any fruits? not really. did i see any of my friends come to Christ? nope. am i such a horribly borin person who isn't shining for God anywhere in my life? i don't even want the answer to that question cos i know it.

i'm stagnating a bit too much. there's too many conflicting things in life. like Dr Bernard said, TENSION between the flesh n the spirit. (hey i remembering) n i'm honestly too tired to fight the good fight of faith anymore.

Damn sian..

I wanna complain man.. I can't believe it..

My cg is like, not very welcoming lor. supposed to go for cycling then cancelled, ask everyone for dinner, only like 3 pple replied. i already asked my pri sch friend to come along, n for the cycling i asked some pple to go liao, then cancelled.

seriously, i really wonder how desperate these pple are to see new friends get saved. or are they too busy with their own lives to bother about God's desires? they seem to be totally bo chup or couldn't care less about getting souls saved or reaching out to friends.

well, if they dun wanna work with me, i'll just go it alone. try to bring my friends for service n cg, thru whatever ways i can. God i can't really complain since i was the one who requested to be transferred over here.. i can't even remmeber my cell group name.. W427? or 437? doesn't seem to ring a bell..

but anyway at least tml night im going jamming with some friends at boon studio. even if its all just Christian songs, at least its something.. i haven't played with a band for like MONTHS.

work at the office is crazy, sometimes super busy, other times super slack. all depending on my boss n when she wants things to be done. oh well, i'm not complaining to get paid to blog n update friendster n watch youtube! hehz...

but to do this for the rest of my life? don't think so.

cloverfield.. i'd rather watch garfield.

what is up with the stream of sucky movies in 2008? i haven't seen a decent film so far!

why cloverfield sucks:

1. imagine blair witch project meets godzilla.

2. no storyline, just pple running around for their lives.

3. one guy risks his life and his friends' lives cos he wants to rescue his ex-gf. why??

4. guy holding the camera runs with the camera through 1.5 hours of the show with explosions and crashing buildings and pple dying, but the camera is unaffected!

5. girl with an iron rod pierced through her shoulder can still be alive and walk around with her friends, with NO BLEEDING from the wound. (this iron road is about half an inch thick and goes through her shoulder.)

6. monsters look like rip off from starship troopers

7. they sound like zerglings from starcraft

8. monsters only eat selective humans (i.e. not the main couple in the show)

9. the movie is incredibly low budget as the first half hour is a video camera showing scenes from a party and americans acting stupid

10. you will vomit if you have motion sickness.

i rest my case.

Smack in the middle of the month of Jan n i'm running out of cash already..

I can't believe my rate of spending.. I think I have roughly a little over $300 to last me for the rest of the month! I started out with $1650 at the beginning of the month, how did it get used up so fast? Let me do a quick calculation of my expediture for Jan up till today.. This is a little too scary!

Tithe = $165
Offerings = $30
EZ link = $40
Taxi = $60+
Movie = $14
VCD = $20
Shopping for clothes = $20+
Building fund = $400
Food = $160+
Repay YQ = $200
Paintball = $60+
CG Fund = $10

Total adds up to about $1180. But considerin I only have around $350 left, I still have not account for about $100.. I really must watch my spending, especially on cab and food! No more paintball for the next few months! That is a really expensive game.

Goals for 2008

Hi God,

Here's a summary of my goals for 2008! finally did manage to spend some time on it.. will prob pray about it and print it out and paste on my room wall to remind myself daily.. might revise it cos its a bit too cluttered up with too many things, might not be realistic for some of the goals..

But still above all of this, I pray that You give me a greater vision, bigger dreams, more desires in my heart. i will not settle fore the mediocre life!! help me break my mindset about settling down and slowing the pace, but instead fill me with more passion for work, more sensitivity to the Holy Spirit, more strength and energy to perform well at work, at church, at ministry, at home, and wherever I go!

Spiritual Life / Personal emotional goals:

1. Complete Fivefold Ministry BS by end of year
2. Read the Bible for 5 minutes a day
3. QT at least 15 min a day (excluding worship - about 10 min)
4. Continue as helper in the new cell group - organise CG outings at least once every month
5. Reach out to 6 friends in 2008 and get them integrated into the cellgroup
6. Bring back 2 backsliders, help to raise up more committed ministry members
7. Learn all new hip pickles sequences and teach SF pple
8. perform in at least 12 gigs this year (average once a month) esp opening act for Singapore Arts Festival in June
9. train up more guitarists in the cell group - william, grace
10. give more for offerings at cg n svc - min $10 each time until June, then up the stakes to $20 each time min
11. Learn how to control temper, be more acommodating
12. No more vulgar words and crude behaviour
13. be more accountable to CGL and build genuine relationships with CG / ex-CG members - SMS and talk to members throughout the week, encourage each member at least once in 2008 with cards, gifts

Family Life:

1. Bring brother and girlfriend to church
2. Spend more time with parents
3. Treat family to dinner at least once every 2 months
4. Spend more effort on family members birthday gifts
5. organise more cousin-outings
6. reach out to shuhui janice

Relationships:

1. Spend more time going out, encouraging and studying with Joan - meet Joan at least once a week excluding svc n ministry time
2. Put more thought into special occasions and gifts
3. Build up strong friendships with certain spiritual guys and girls - who?
4. Meet up with non-church friends at least twice a month
5. Organise JC class outing

Career:

1. Read more finance news, newspapers, magazines, etc
2. Get used to waking up early and reach office by 8.45 am everyday.
3. Earn $5 k per month min by end of 2008
4. stay no later than 7 pm in office 4 out of 5 working days, no working on Sundays

Health:

1. Lose the pot belly by jogging at least 2-3 times a week - whether or not i'm alone!
2. Train up muscles by doing 30 push ups and 30 sit ups everyday
3. Take better care of my skin, visit doctor not more than 5 times a year for skin problem
4. go swimming / cycling once a month

Finances:

1. pay up building fund ASAP!! Half of Jan salary goes to BF, followed by 1/3 of Feb's salary
2. start saving up money in the bank - aim to save at least $15,000 in bank by Dec, minimum savings $2500 a month from June onwards
3. start buying insurance or investment policies
4. start giving money to parents - $200 each from May onwards
5. bless Joan with better gifts and finances
6. get better gifts for friends' birthdays, weddings and special occasions - at least $100 a month
7. take taxi max 5 times a month
8. limit overall expenditure to $200 a week - food, transport, entertainment, shopping, bills
9. start payin my own handphone bills by June.
10. start planning for family life and long term goals

Entertainment / leisure:

1. get at least 7 hous sleep a day
2. go for movie twice a month minimum
3. practice keyboard at least once a week for 1 hour
4. write at least 6 new songs
5. spend maximum only 1 hour a day playing computer
6. meet up with different friends at least bi-weekly for dinner
7. go night cycling 3 times
8. go paintball another 2 times
9. learn a new dance - source for dance lessons and instructor
10. go for a holiday with Joan at least once in June

Miscellaneous:

1. pack my room, throw away old books n clothes before CNY
2. blog at least once a week!
3, evaluate my progress once every 3 months

God i pray that i will roughly stick to this guideline as much as possible, and not give up after the first few weeks!

In Jesus name I pray,
Amen!!

AVP2 sucked!

Oh man here's my list of complaints for the AVP2 movie:

1. The Predator was really pathetic.

Those who have watched Predator 1 n 2 would know, Predators kick serious butt in those movies and would've tracked down any enemies in its vicinity and killed it quickly and efficiently. In AVP2 we have aliens taking turns to dodge bullets from the Predator's shoulder canon, we have aliens popping up near his face without him noticing, aliens walking under and above him making him look like an idiot. That was really a big insult to the ultimate hunter-killer in the universe!

2. The Aliens were really really pathetic.

Compared to the fast and nimble aliens of the previous movies, the AVP2 aliens move like snails. Maybe the special effects were on low budget, or the directors didn't watch the previous alien movies. And they had some sort of growth hormones that made them grow ultra fast only to also die ultra fast. Pistol bullets don't kill it but a predator can stomp on its head to crush it. Oh well, I don't really like aliens in the first place, but the director really made them look real crappy.

3. The Predalien boxing match with the Predator was ridiculous.

When it comes down to the final showdown, you see the Predalien moving like it was stoned on drugs. Painfully slow. The Predator on its own should've been killed by the predalien, especially since it was weaponless and already injured. But to please both fans of Predators and Aliens, they had to make them kill each other. Duh.

2008 begins.. yawnz..

Dear God,

Its the scond day of 2008, and I really hope that this year will be a better year for everyone, especially myself. 2007 was a year of living on the edge, taking many crazy risks, playing for strikeforce in many countries, going through PLC as if it didn't really matter how well I did, getting to know many new cg members, quitting choir, getting attached.. God, it seemed that so many things have happened in 2007, it was like the ultimate happening year!

But now, things are gonna change. I'm going to a different cg, a different service, a different location, with a new bunch of pple whom i'm not at all familiar with.

At least I can thank You for all the good things that happened in 2007, my parents seem to be opening up to the gospel and are on their way to becoming firm believers. That's one thing I'm totally happy about! Hahaha..

I've got a great relationship with Joan despite some quarrels here n there, we know that we're probably set to get married n start a family in the long run cos we're really serious about this relationship, though we may say nasty things n have fights once in awhile, at the end of the day its about learning more about each other, giving n taking, compromising and devleloping skills in communication.

One thing tat I still need to ask of You Lord, is for healing for my skin. The eczema is really irritating and painful sometimes, and it actually affects my work performance and other areas of daily life. So I pray God, the first prayer in 2008, to be totally healed of this disease and affliction, that You remove the skin problem permanently from my life. I really hate having this skin problem n being unable to do so many things that other normal pple can do. Please help me get rid of the eczema, I definitely don't want my children in the future to suffer the same problem.

Ok, time for lunch. Say grace first.

In Jesus name,
Amen.